fashion

There's a product on ASOS that has us very, very confused.

Okay, I’ll admit it. It’s been a while since I looked at a fashion magazine or read a street-style blog. I couldn’t tell you this season’s colours or what’s on trend, accessories-wise.

But I find it really hard to imagine that things have moved on so substantially that this is now a thing:

asos dinosaur tail

Note: this is an appropriate facial expression for an adult wearing a shiny, green dinosaur tail. Image: ASOS.

Yes. That's a long, shiny, green dinosaur tail. For sale. On ASOS. For adults. For FIFTY FOUR AUSTRALIAN DOLLARS!

Advertisements for the prehistoric accessory have been clawing their way into social feeds recently (disturbingly, as a “recommended” item), and they seem to have cut through so effectively that the black version actually sold out on ASOS UK.

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But I’m confused. And thankfully, so are plenty of other people.

After all, it doesn't appear to be fancy dress, as the model is pairing it with a bomber jacket and some little denim shorts. Also, the brand doesn’t seem to be selling shiny, green feet to match.

So what's the haps?

According to the accompanying blurb, the TellTails Shinosaur Tail is a hand-washable, one-size-fits-all accessory designed to help you "get your waggle on". "On a mission to unleash your inner animal, TellTails' designs are either stuffed ‘swooshers’ or bendable to fit your mood," it reads.

Okay, so it's kind of... Or maybe you could wear it for.... Nope, we've got nothing. In fact, that description just raises a whole host of other questions. ie. Mood - seriously? And what do you mean by "designs", plural?

Well, this. They mean this.

And this one.

And also this.

Determined to find out the true meaning of this sartorial strangeness, we hunted down the manufacturer online. Their explanation:

“Wearing a TellTail is an exercise in silliness. It’s about not taking yourself to seriously, it’s about self-expression, it’s about the unadulterated enhancement of fun in the extreme.”

Simple as that.

Let's be honest, deep down we wish we were bold enough to rock a fluffy fox tail to work or a family BBQ. But for now, we might just leave it in the perhaps-but-almost-definitely-not bag. It can keep the high-waisted booty shorts company.

Do you own a tail? Tell us what occasions you whip it out for in the comments below.