lifestyle

This is how much a vagina costs

 

 

 

 

Life is expensive. That probably doesn’t come as much of a surprise to you. But what you may find surprising is the amount of money you may be spending just by having a vagina in your pants.

Because they require so many things, don’t they?  Birth control pills. Tampons. Pap smears. UTI remedies. Waxing. Thrush cream….it’s a long list. Certainly when you compare it to the needs of a penis which are far more modest and mostly optional.

US website Jezebel did the calculations on just how much it costs the average American women to have a vagina and came up with a figure of  US$2663.02 PER YEAR.  And that’s not even taking variables such as emergency contraception, pregnancy tests or abortions into account.

Since their calculations were American estimates based on the experiences of Jezebel staff, we’ve done our own Australian version to see exactly how much the average Aussie girl might spend on her vagina every year.

Here’s what we worked out…

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Birth control: Yasmin Tablets, 12 months supply = $280

Tampons & pads: Tampons, 20 a month =  $67. Pads, 14 a month = $60

PMS relief: Naprogesic Tablets = $13. Heat pack = $20

Sex: Condoms, 4 packs  = $50. Lubricant, 2 tubes = $20

Vagisil: 60ml tube = $7

UTI remedies: Antibiotics = $40. Doctor’s appointment = $85. Bottle of Cranberry Juice = $6

Yeast Infection: Diflucan = $35. Doctor’s appointment = $85

Waxing: 9 waxes a year at $40 = $360

Pap Smear: $130

Toilet Paper: 12 packs a year = $96

TOTAL: $1284

And variables: Pregnancy Test = $20. Morning After Pill = $30. Abortion = $400

TOTAL: $450

So the good news is that an Australian vagina costs less than half the price of an American one to maintain. And of course, every vagina’s individual circumstances are going to be different. Maybe you use a Mooncup, maybe you let your lady garden grow, maybe you don’t need to buy the pill or condoms.

But this doesn’t even take into account other things like women’s UNDIES. While men can wander into Kmart once every few years to pick out a four-pack of Bonds trunks, women are constantly shelling out to fill up the different categories of their undies drawer: the ‘special’ undies, the ‘everyday’ undies, the fat-sucking undies, and the period undies

Columnist says it best in her book How To Be A Woman: “I can’t believe we’ve got to a point where it’s basically costing us MONEY to have a fanny. They’re making us pay for maintenance and upkeep of our lulus, like they’re a communal garden. It’s a stealth tax. A fanny GST. This is money we should be spending on THE ELECTRICITY BILL and CHEESE.”

When faced with the numbers, do you think you spend more on your vagina than, say, your hair? Or your face? Or any other body part, for that matter?

Tags: women

Top Comments

better-off 10 years ago

Get rid of trhe panties/knickers if you want to save money - read Pantiless in NYC regarding getting rid of yeast infections by getting rid of panties under skirts or anything else.


Crm 11 years ago

Haha that list sounds ridiculously costly.
I'm not on the pill, I can't have it but even if I could I wouldn't knowing me I'd forget to take pills. So not much point. Tampons and pads wouldn't cost me anywhere near that much. I don't get waxed all the time, you know life gets busy so it doesn't become necessary, 5 times a year maybe. I don't use painkillers that often, only when really necessary for period pain so I probably only buy one herron blue pack a year at the most.
That's about it really, what more do you need?