Translated: Parent-teacher interviews.

The world is made up of ordinary people. As long as your kids are okay, have some nice friends and interests, does any of that stuff really matter?

Your child works to the best of their ability. - You child is really not very clever.

Your child has made a good effort this year. - They are really average and don't stand out at all.

They seem to struggle with difficult concepts. - They are lazy and need to sit down, shut up and do their work.

They are easily distracted. - They can't sit in a chair and won't stop playing on their phone/iPad/computer.