Last year, I was incredibly moved by a story I saw on 60 Minutes about a gay couple from Melbourne who had had twin girls via a surrogate in India. It provoked some lively debate and I was delighted when the two fathers in question, Trevor and Peter, hopped on and got involved in the comments.
Recently, Peter contacted me about something else and I asked him if I could come meet him and Trevor and the girls, Evelyn and Gaia, next time I was in Melbourne.
They welcomed me into their home with hugs and warmth and it was really hard to leave. Especially after meeting the girls who I very much wanted to pop in my handbag and take home because they were just so delicious.
I took my camera along for the ride – excuse the amateur nature of the footage, I’m trying – and I persuaded the enormously talented Fully Sick Rapper to work some editing magic on it which he kindly did from the salubrious location of his isolation ward.
Here is part one…….
You can visit Trevor and Peter’s site here and follow Fully Sick Rapper on FB here or Twitter here
Update: Trevor and Peter have since also had a baby boy via surrogacy in India, named Reuben Harvey Alexander.
Top Comments
Lana, help! All 3 videos on this topic have been deleted and I have not seen them yet- what happened??
The videos have been posted onto my blog, with links back to the mamamia pages with the story ...
ethicalsurrogacy.blogspot.com
Hi
First, I completely support the rights of gay men to be parents if they would like to be, and to share in all the same rights as any other citizen of our country has come to expect in relationships or otherwise.
Second, I did not see the Sixty Minutes interview, but have watched the video and read the supportive comments. However, I can't see any discussion about the "uterus", as Mia called the woman who was the surrogate for your girls. What were the outcomes for her, financially, socially and health-wise? Why did she choose to become a surrogate? What were her options, rights and treatment during the process? I find the use of "uteruses" of women in underdeveloped areas of the world, on the financial fringe, to be very ethically contentious and can't see any discussion here about that.
Yes, it's wonderful the girls are being cared for and loved. Good on you. But what about the system you are buying into when investing in surrogacy in India?
Nicky
Very good questions which needs to be asked, thank you..
I don’t think as the parents of the children we can give you the answers you seek. Would I be right in saying that this is information you would like to hear from the surrogate and egg donor? If you have a complete list of questions I am happy to forward it to our doctor to see if either of the women will answer. I’m sure Mia would love to come for the birth and ask the questions herself if she did not have her own little ones to look after.
I can say categorically that our surrogate receives $5000 for helping us as it is stipulated in our contract. Also the intended parents can give gifts directly to the surrogate as well if they feel they want to increase the amount.. We have pictures of our surrogate and she looks incredibly happy. I will not publish them to protect her privacy …..all I can suggest is maybe we should ask Mia to do a phone interview with our doctor.
You can find a link to the 60 min segment on Peters blog www.ethicalsurrogacy.blogsp... and the follow up as well.
Thankyou for your reply, Trevor.
I just realised that the person called Michael who responded to my questions about ethics on the second part of the interview may not be connected to you. I guess my response still applies.
It's good that you are open to scrutiny on these issues. I'm not sure that one interview with a surrogate or an egg donor at one point in time, or one interview with the doctor would inform ethical deliberations much, unless they are done in the broader context of other data. For example, Mia cannot verify anything the doctor claims, and we do not know under what circumstances the surrogate and the donor are offering their comments - particularly as they are under paid contract to deliver a service. For such information to be reliable it would really need to be collected by an independent person, and collected from a bigger sample, alongside objective data about fees, care covered, etc..
Do you have a financial link with the doctor, getting a fee for successful referrals, as another post claimed? That further complicates consideration of the information offered. If you are part of the industry as a financial beneficiary, as well as benefitting from the services of the surrogate in terms of having children, then there is an even higher ethical standard to meet - including work asking for government regulation of the industy in the interests of the surrogates and donors, and in lobbying for clear standards of care that must be met under these regulations.