If you haven't seen the unhinged drama playing out on The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives reality TV show, then you've seen it in the headlines. 

A swinging scandal . 

Allegations of domestic violence . 

Pornography addiction. 

Infidelity and cheating allegations . 

Basically, TMZ is having a field day with these people.

In recent days, the group's so-called leader, Taylor Frankie Paul, has been accused of domestic violence by her ex-partner, Dakota Mortensen.

Then a video of the alleged incident surfaced online, just days before her season of The Bachelorette was set to air. ABC has since pulled the show

Now, one of the group's central figures, Jessi Draper, is speaking out about her own marriage breakdown, which happened this month, revealing the moment everything finally clicked.

In the interview, Jessi described her relationship as increasingly difficult, claiming she was on the receiving end of frequent criticism about nearly every aspect of her life — from her career to her appearance. Until one moment made everything click.

Watch: The cancellation of Taylor Frankie Paul's The Bachelorette season. Post continues below.

A marriage born from grief.

Jessi Draper's marriage to Jordan Ngatikaura began in the wake of personal heartbreak.

She had recently left a previous marriage that she described as controlling, and while healing, met Jordan — a father navigating his own past, raising a daughter from a prior relationship.

The couple married in October 2020, and over the next few years, they welcomed two children together: son Jagger Zayn and daughter Jovi, alongside Jordan's older daughter, Peyton.

Despite appearances of a picture-perfect family, Jessi described a marriage that grew increasingly fraught. After a 90-day separation which was aired on the TV show, the pair have finally decided to split.

Jessi said that she was the one who decided the divorce should happen, and that they should mutually announce it.

However, in a bombshell episode of Call Her Daddy, released on March 26, she said Jordan had gone around her and leaked the news of their separation to TMZ.

They haven't even told their children yet, aged 6 and 3.

The moment she knew. 

While in a session with her energy healer months before her final decision, she was asked a simple question. 

"Are you safe?"

Jessi told Alex Cooper, "I told her everything and it was the first time I said it out loud. And that was the moment that I was like, "I have to leave him."

"She goes, 'Jessi, this is [allegedly] emotional abuse.'"

It was a moment of reckoning for her. 

"It was like a weight had fallen off," she said. "It was almost like something clicked and I was seeing it clearly for the first time.

"My mum wasn't even shocked and she was hoping we would just end it."

The pair ended up going on a period of separation for 90 days before attempting to reconcile. 

The Pilates fight. 

Throughout the interview, Jessi alleged that Jordan could be manipulative and controlling in every part of her life, advocating for traditional gender roles while he "played golf" and she worked. 

She says it was, "90 per cent criticism and 10 per cent compliments... like how I ran my business, how I parented, my time management, how I cleaned the house, every little thing. Even how I would dress."

She recalled a fight they had right before she finally decided to end things. 

"He told me he wanted me to start doing Pilates every single day," she explained. "He said, 'I believe in traditional gender roles and I want to be more in my masculine and I want you to be more in your feminine'."

This request came while Jessi was the breadwinner, taking care of the children and her husband. It's estimated her hair brand JZ Styles is worth approximately $2.37 millionAUD.

"He doesn't work and we had a full-time nanny. So he wasn't even helping with the kids until nighttime," Jessi shared.

Listen: The Spill breaks down the Taylor Frankie Paul drama. Post continues below.

The final straw. 

Jessi had brought up divorce with Jordan multiple times but he'd always calmed her down and got her to try again. 

She felt like she was in limbo. 

"Anyone that's lived in limbo knows it's excruciating where I'm like, 'I don't know if this is right or not,'" she said. 

But eventually, she had a dawning sense of clarity. 

It was Thursday 11 March, when the moment finally hit her. In four words, she knew her marriage was over.

"I literally woke up one day and I was like, it's such a simple thought. I was like, 'I can change this'," she said.

Adding, "It's going to be hard, but I can do this. And my life doesn't have to be this way. 

"It was like something flipped and I was like, 'I'm done'."

The next day, Jessi decided to come out with the truth. 

"His emotions were calm, then mad. Then he kind of gaslit me and was like, 'You're not healed enough. You can't love yourself yet'."

She had to drive away from the discussion and has since been staying at a hotel while they sort out the details of the divorce. He's currently living in the house she paid for.

Looking back, Jessi says the hardest part wasn't leaving. It was how long it took her to get there.

"I did lose myself," she said. "And the people closest to me saw that."

For years, she says she stayed in a situation that made her deeply unhappy — not because she didn't know, but because she wasn't ready.

"I felt so trapped in that marriage, you know, like I couldn't do anything right," she said. 

"I was so beaten down emotionally and I was just so unhappy, deeply unhappy in what I was in."

But in a way, she feels now she has a new lease on life. 

She spoke to another personality on the show, Chase, who reminded her just how successful she's been, even with a difficult marriage. 

He told her, "This is what you've accomplished being held back. Like this is going to be scary to see what you can do."

And she agrees. 

"And I was like, 'You're right. Like I could do anything'."

Feature image: Call Her Daddy.