kids

"Stop being a narcissist and let your children believe in Santa."

The first time I ever heard of a parent purposely not letting their child believe in Santa Claus, I was 18 and in my first year of uni.

My philosophy lecturer explained that he and his wife refused to have some imaginary fat guy take credit for the presents they worked hard to buy for their child. At the time, this made sense to me. More than a decade down the track with children of my own, however, it seems nothing short of narcissistic.

Gift giving shouldn’t be about taking credit for the gift; it’s about seeing the recipient’s eyes light up when they open something they have longed for. There is nothing better than being woken at an ungodly hour on Christmas morning to the excited squeals of children who have discovered that “he’s been! Santa came!

The thing is, children aren’t going to believe in Santa forever. Eventually they’ll grow up, and they’ll know that mum and dad were behind the magic of Christmas, and they’ll be even more thankful for that magic than they would have been for knowing that their parents bought the gifts at the time. The need to take credit for the presents is, in my opinion, a bit like those people who film themselves giving a meal to a homeless person and then post the footage on social media so everyone can fawn over what a nice person they are. That is not true giving.

A lot of people talk about how lying to children about the existence of Santa is wrong, but if we’re going down that road, the entire Christmas holiday is based on a big lie. Surely by 2016, no one believes that a virgin gave birth to the son of an omniscient being who created the Earth? I’ve never met anyone who has been scarred for life by the Santa lie. I look back and wish I could re-capture some of that magic of childhood, but the closest I can get is giving it to my own children, and hopefully teaching them that the true joy of giving is not in getting credit for the gift, but in giving someone else a moment of happiness.

"I’m going to give my kids as much Christmas magic as I can." Image supplied.

In any case, the stakes are so much higher if they know you’re the one buying the presents. By believing in Santa, at least if they don’t get exactly what they wanted you can blame someone else. And the old “I’m calling Santa” as a means to end bad behaviour is my December school holidays saviour.

I know that my kids are going to learn the truth probably sooner rather than later, so in the meantime I’m going to give them as much Christmas magic as I can. You should too.

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Top Comments

LadyBlah 7 years ago

Please stop using trendy words, which are actually really hurtful, damaging and stigmatizing words to promote your uneducated and unintellingent opinions.


Pete 7 years ago

I used to think I would tell my kids he's not real at a young age but by the time you actually have kids, you wise up and understand the joy it brings to their lives so what sort of a parent would you actually be taking that joy away from them. You're spot on Kelly!
I think it's important for kids to understand that it's not all just Santa, that their parents in fact do work hard to provide for them and give them gifts, but certainly not to the point you take away the joy and magic of a creepy old dude dropping present off to every (well behaved) kid in the world in the span of 24 hours with flying reindeers...