Claire Dalton had met the love of her life at 17.
After four years together, Claire was about to walk down the aisle to marry her “best friend”.
But then she looked on her future husband’s phone.
There, she discovered something that made her feel like “someone had taken a dagger and fiercely pierced it” into her heart.
It was…
.
.
Wait for it.
.
.
Prepare yourself.
.
.
PORN.
Yep, it turns out ole’ mate fiance liked to watch porn.
Claire has written about this life-changing discovery in a 1860 word piece for the Facebook group Love What Matters.
In the post, the 21-year-old describes herself as “THAT girl”.
“That girl that spent six months with a ring on her finger thinking I had finally found what I’d been looking for. The girl that was about to step foot into the journey of her “dreams coming true.” That girl that planned an entire wedding only to find a week prior that it was all a lie from the beginning.”
Claire goes on to describe the night she discovered what will be forever known as #PornGate.
She had grabbed her fiance’s phone to search for a store that stocked something they needed for their wedding. In the search bar, she discovered “three words” which revealed he had been searching for porn just hours earlier.
She then discovered several windows of images with “sick and twisted ideas of what women supposedly look like”.
When she confronted her husband to be, he lied to her and said his brother had a porn addiction and must have been using his phone.
“I felt sick to my stomach,” Claire wrote.
“The coldest thing I’ve ever witnessed in my entire life is the lying eyes of the man I love, gazing deep into my soul as multiple lies rolled from his lips.
“He knew it was all a lie, but for some reason, he could look at the woman he claimed to love so dearly straight in her eyes, and lie to her face.
“I never knew until that moment how unconsciously cold a single person could be.”
But later, her husband came clean, telling her that he “has a problem” with porn.
She immediately called off the wedding.
“I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to kick and punch the wall,” she wrote. “But in that moment, I felt paralysed. I had a sudden frightening sensation of someone grasping at my neck as if someone or something was attempting to suffocate me to my death.
“I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. Everything felt lonely. Everything reminded me of him.
“Everything made me feel overwhelmingly sick to my stomach. I felt traumatised. I felt worthless. And I felt incredibly afraid.”
Claire’s post attracted thousands of comments, with many people criticising her for dumping her fiance for watching porn.
In a follow up post, Claire said it wasn’t her job to fix his “addiction”.
“But to those who think I ‘jumped ship,’ you’re right … I did. Because when someone in an engagement decides to violate God’s laws, honesty doesn’t exist. And neither does love.
“At that point, because we were not yet married, it was not my job to ‘fix him.’ It’s his job to fix himself.”
She then said she personally called all 300 people who had been invited to the wedding and told them what had happened.
“Pornography addiction does not just affect you. Pornography addiction affects the people around you, and it’s only so long before the truth is going to come out,” she wrote in her post.
“There is nothing natural or healthy about indulging in pornography. To say that ‘all men look at porn’ is to say that all men care more about self-gratification and sexual desire than they do about their wives, daughters, sons, and the other people they love in their life.”
You can read Claire’s full 1860 word post here.
Top Comments
I don’t condone lying..but the poor bugger had his wedding cancelled to a woman he probably loved dearly all because he chooses to watch some porn and have a touchy feels with himself. And he did come clean to her but with massive repercussions!!!
I am a woman and I enjoy porn. I think it’s sad that some see it as failure and feel they should be ashamed for enjoying it. Do what makes you happy. You are completely entitled to masturbate to porn if you want to.
I can’t lie... as soon as I realised this was more of a religious problem I felt relieved for him. I hope he meets a woman who doesn’t make him feel ashamed for watching something that turns him on. Hopefully he can enjoy watching it with someone else in the future 🤪
I’m surprised at the comments here. Why shouldn’t she have expectations of her partner? If they had discussed this issue and agreed on what is and is not acceptable conduct, and he broke that promise, why wouldn’t she be upset?!? Good on her for standing firm and not excusing what is obviously a deal breaker for her. The fact that it isn’t for a lot of other people isn’t relevant.
I think a lot of people believe the trendy lie (which “Friends” did the hard sell of) that watching porn is cool and harmless.
In fact it takes huge efforts to conquer a porn addiction and therapy is a growing industry.
Porn is destructive and damaging to its participants and its watchers. Too many people I know have been ruined by it, lost jobs, lost families. Good on her for making the call.