We sh*t you not, Britney Spears is influencing international diplomacy.

New reports from the east coast of Africa have suggested that the British Navy are using songs by Ms Britney Spears to scare pirates away.

Now there’s a sentence we’d never thought we’d write…

But if this story is true, it’s possibly the most bizarre-yet-delicious yarn we’ve heard all year. Prepare yourselves.

Throughout the coastal waters of some African countries, it’s not uncommon for pirates to take control of ships and demand ransom money for the return of crews.

According to media reports, songs like ‘Oops I Did It Again’ and ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time’ are being blasted from naval ships’ speakers in an effort to stop pirates from boarding ships.

This from

Second Officer Rachel Owens, who works on supertankers off the east coast of Africa, said: “Her songs were chosen by the security team because they thought the pirates would hate them most.

‘These guys can’t stand Western culture or music, making Britney’s hits perfect. As soon as the pirates get a blast of Britney, they move on as quickly as they can.” “

Britney Spears making her mark in the world of international diplomacy.

Who knew?

If only the Democrats had thought to play a little ‘Toxic’ to the Republicans, the recent shutdown of the US Government might have ended far sooner. Or maybe if the Sea Shepherd had belted out some ‘You Drive Me Crazy’ to the Japanese whalers, they would have more success achieving their environmental aims.

One thing we do know for sure is that Britney is back. Bitch.