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Ben Fordham calls out Salim Mehajer's actions for what they really are and it's about time.

The fallout from Salim Mehajer’s obscene rant leaked to A Current Affair has been intense. It’s shocking, it’s disturbing, and it’s abundantly clear that this man is not mentally sound to be a leader or a husband.

But what we’ve all been waiting for is for someone to publicly call out Mehajer’s behaviour for what it really is: domestic abuse. And this morning, Ben Fordham did just that.

Sadly, the dialogue surrounding the leaked footage has been murky. Whilst the majority have thrown their support behind wife Aysha and her safety, there is still sentiment that Mehajer’s actions came from love. You know, just a passionate guy losing his cool about his wife. He didn’t mean it, right? He was just angry. He still loves her.

This kind of dangerous perspective is far from a new issue. Domestic violence continues to be perpetrated by those who think verbal or physical abuse is born from a place of passion, that hitting or screaming at your partner is because you love them is somehow excusable.

How important it was, therefore, to hear a male voice this morning denounce Mehajer’s actions and call them out for what they really are.

On this morning’s segment on the Today show, Ben Fordham and Mamamia’s Jo Abi discussed the disturbing footage, and the even more disturbing concept that anyone could continue to support Mehajer.

“He’s gone out of his way to cultivate this image, that he’s a smooth operator, that he’s a romantic – the effort that he went to for this wedding he’s put together when he married his bride Aysha,” pointed out Ben.

Ben went on to note that well before the leaked footage was made public, Mehajer was exhibiting controlling and threatening behaviour towards his wife.

 

"Then there was this thing a month or so ago where he said 'Til death do us part' on Twitter," said Ben. "Now, I know that's part of the wedding vows, but it's also something that I think can be perceived as a bit of a threat - to say, 'we'll only be apart if someone dies in this relationship'."

For Ben, the proof is in the pudding with the shocking video.

"Now there we have it, on video," he said, "recorded by the lunatic himself. He is an absolute grub, and a guy that threatens the life of his wife, and threatens to rape her parents, is deranged lunatic and a grub."

Listen: Mia Freedman interviews Ben Fordham on No Filter about leaving the Today show, becoming a dad and escaping conviction of 2 years jail time after a hidden camera report. Post continues below.

For co-host Jo Abi, the importance of the footage lay beyond exposing his behaviour - it was an important lesson for younger Australians who needed to learn what domestic abuse really is.

Jo decided to allow her young son to watch the footage with her to exemplify what kind of behaviour is not acceptable towards women.

"My twelve year old son accidentally watched it with me last night - we were doing homework in front of the TV. It came on, he watched it, we were both incredibly shocked. My first instinct was to turn it off, but I thought, nope. Teaching moment," said Jo.

"Because I'm someone from an ethnic background, and I know a lot of people and ethnic men who would say this is passion, this is heartbreak, this is love. And I had a conversation with my 12 year-old saying this is not passion, this is not heartbreak, this is not love."

"This is crazy, this is illegal, this is abuse, and I appreciated the chance to have that conversation."

The video Mehajer sent Aysha is beyond shocking.

“Give me a call in five minutes ... I’m gonna rape your mum and your f***ing dad! Call me now!” he says in the video.

“Aysha, I hope you die, you sl*t."

Unbelievably, Mehajer has brushed off the footage as being taken out of context, whilst maintaining that he still loves his wife.

"Aysha is a beautiful, warm, amazing individual," he said in a statement released today, "whom I believe was betrayed, or set up, by someone who supplied A Current Affair with these out-of-context videos to make a sensationalised story."

Watching the leaked video, it is hard to understand what kind of context Mehajer's language and unbridled fury would ever be appropriate. The only answer to that is simple - there isn't. Threatening your partner with a video message in which you make death threats, rape threats, accusations...it is, plain and simply, abuse.

And there is no place for abuse in a relationship, no matter how fiery you believe your 'passion' to be.

But as Ben Fordham firmly stated in this morning's show,  "That's not passion, that's scary."

If you or somebody you know might be suffering from domestic abuse, please contact White Ribbon Australia.

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Top Comments

Guest 8 years ago

Seeing this video of Mehajer gave me chilling memories of the frequent verbal attacks of my ex-husband against me. It didn't matter what I did, I was stupid, I was a slut, I was having an affair. I am glad this video has come to light. It shows that there is more to DV than just getting punched in the face - something that so few of my friends seemed to understand when I was going through it. I am 18 months free. I wish Aysha all the best for her freedom journey


Ms.M 8 years ago

I would like to commend Jo Abi's comments on this issue. I too am of an ethnic background and I absolutely support her comment that men of a NESB would make the excuse that this type of behaviour/ talk is acceptable or justified when you're upset/hurt.
I also think she needs a mummy pat on the back for taking the opportunity to teach her 12 year old not to grow up and be a dickhead like Mehajer. We learn best through examples...
I'm not sure if this is a set up as Mehajer claims, but that IS him on the video screaming those words and making those threats and insults - about time he stand up and be accountable - that's what mature adults do. He obviously is not one of those. So its probably for the best that girl got the hell away from him when she did.
Guys like this cant handle being exposed for what they really are, They rely on people being scared and domestic matters being hidden or 'dealt with in the family'- that's code for an egotistical male getting his way every time...sad sad little man...

Ceist Celt 8 years ago

Guys like that are like six foot toddlers having a tantrum. Dangerous toddlers.