You know a Relaunch when you see one.
Bridget hasn’t posted on Instagram for a while. Last thing you heard she was living overseas with her boyfriend, Mike.
Oh.
But now Bridget’s back in your Instagram feed and, yes, she’s in a gold ball gown. You can’t quite make out the occasion. She’s twirling in a forest and has a spray tan and highlights. Fresh highlights.
The caption is about the year ahead. “2019 is my year…” Bridget says, before alluding to all the possibilities.
The picture, in all its glory, begs one question – and it’s meant to.
Where the f*ck did Mike go?
We talked about The Relaunch on Mamamia Out Loud. Post continues…
Mike is gone now and, no, Bridget doesn’t want to talk about it. Hence The Relaunch.
The Relaunch can be defined as follows.
The launch of oneself following a break up, specifically on Instagram, involving a thirsty (but not desperate) image. Used to announce status as single to community but also world at large. It says ‘if you’ve ever had the slightest interest, NOW IS YOUR CHANCE.’
Here are some examples:
Jenna Dewan announcing herself post Channing Tatum split.
Amber Heard celebrating ‘Friday’ not long after break up with Elon Musk.
… And again on Valentine’s Day.
CLASSIC relaunch by Jessica Origliasso in the month after her break up from Ruby Rose.
Ariana Grande being sexy in bed after Pete Davidson.
I asked friends to send me their Relaunch photos… and they are everything.
Renny is very pensive post break up
Rach would like her ex boyfriend to know what he is missing out on, please, but also attract new interest. All with one simple photo!
Oh. I've Relaunched like four times and they're all... a lot.
Twenty years ago, The Relaunch consisted of a) new clothes, b) a brand new hair cut and c) possibly a fringe that one would immediately regret and d) desperately trying to get the word out there that you were on the market, perhaps through distributing... flyers.
Now, The Relaunch is supported by a number of comments, mostly from the sisterhood who are helping to improve reach. There are flame emojis, love heart eyes emojis, strong arm emojis and comments like, #goals and "Tell me everything about last night xxx" from Bridget's good mate, Jen.
Jen, of course, knows that nothing happened last night. But it's a critical step in letting everyone know that Bridget is very busy but also sought after.
The direct messages are open. The comments are extremely welcome. The likes are appreciated.
The Relaunch is the modern day mating call - like when koalas let off that weird smell, or crickets vibrate their creepy wings.
When a woman Relaunches she is setting her light from red to a blinding green, the visual equivalent of yelling: "I'M HERE PLEASE SEE ME."
Chances are you've seen a lot of Relaunches lately - some were posted during an emergency girls trip to Thailand, and others lying in bed on a Sunday afternoon after at least 500 attempts to look a bit sexy.
But, in case there was some confusion, there is nothing at all 'sad' or 'desperate' about The Relaunch. Rather, it's an act of commendable efficiency.
You see, The Relaunch reminds us of the liberating freedom that comes with a break up; a chance to somewhat reinvent yourself.
It's an opportunity, and the girl in The Relaunch photo bloody knows it.
Top Comments
"But, in case there was some confusion, there is nothing at all 'sad' or 'desperate' about The Relaunch."
But that's a matter of interpretation, isn't it? From where I'm sitting, it all looks pretty sad and desperate to me. Living your life to this extent on social media is a bit pathetic, just quietly.