by ZOE FOSTER
Not that any of us ever have them obviously! Ha! As if. We are total dreamboats, the lot of us, sailing from one gloriously glossy hair day to the next without so much as a lick of frizz or a lank fringe in sight.
But sometimes our, uh, friends have shit hair days, so maybe keep these tips handy and pass them on…
1. The fake ‘I’ve had my hair done’
Great for any length, sort or long: Run your styler/ghd/Cloud Nine/flat iron over the ends of your hair, just a couple of inches up from the tips is all, so they look sharp and, yknow, cool. Then use a styling cream (like Rusk Wired Styling Cream) or a dab of your dude’s styling wax or pomade warmed up in your hands, and define the ends a bit. Next flip your hair upside down, and mist hairspray all over lightly. Wait 10 seconds, then flip up. Tousle with fingers and you’re done, cool cat.
2. Inject Instant interest
Great for: waves and curls: Spray dry shampoo all over the head, pulling air up to get underneath and at the back too. Leave in for 30 seconds, then on low heat, use your hair dryer and fingers to settle it in to the scalp and soak up any oil. Next massage a small amount of texture cream or paste (like Garnier Fructis Surf hair) between your hands, then grab and twirl and “fondle” random sections from the mid-lengths to the ends. Zim zang zop – root lift and texture!
3. Cheaty loose waves.
Great for long, dull, flat hair: Mist thermal protector through hair and allow to dry. Take your curling tong (or styler) and starting at the ears or below, (you roughly want the bottom third section of hair, no higher) put in random curls all over. Hold the tong or styler close to the head, not sticking out, so the waves lay flatter. Once each curl is done, tug it gently at the bottom to make it wavy and loose rather than right and coiled. Spray all over with light hair spray and then marvel at your new sexy texture. (Sexture.)
4. The twisty tousled texture hit
Great for: one-length bobs
Spritz sea salt spray (like the excellent Bumble and Bumble Surf spray) all over your dry hair. Take sections haphazardly and twist the hair with fingers so that it starts to turn back on itself. Bobby pin in place and then go over whole head with low-air, low-heat hair dryer to set it. Allow to cool completely then remove pins and tousle and tease and scrunch the hair with your fingers and a light zhoom with that low-heat, low-air hair dryer.
5. The Bardot.
Great for: hair that is already quite big and maybe reminiscent of rat woman. (Usually after having an intense hairstyle/updo the night before.)
Do nothing except finger scrape, very gently, your hair up onto the top of your head. Secure with a hair bungee or elastic into a high pony up there. There can be pieces framing your face and ‘bubbles’ it’s okay. Now with bobby pins secure the pony into a loose bun shape, tugging gently at sections once it’s in a bun, so that it’s voluminous. Use a clean, large powder or bronzer brush and brush it in small circles along your hair line, which will bring out more cute little face-framey bits of hair, which softens it and adds to the overall Brigitte Bardot look. Add winged eyeliner and nude lips, obviously.
6. Slick down and behave yourself
Great for: hair that won’t do ANY of the above.
Mix some blow dry/straightening cream with gel together in your hands and comb through – with a fine tooth comb – hair that you have dunked under the tap and made wet, but not washed. Create a nice, deep side part and comb it neatly into a low ponytail or bun, or if your hair is short, just tuck behind ears. Do a red/bright lip or add some deco-style earrings (very now) and well, look at you, fancy pants.
Zoe is an author, columnist and porridge fan. Her books include the beauty bible Amazing Face, dating and relationship guide Textbook Romance, and three novels, Air Kisses, Playing The Field and The Younger Man. Find more info on her here, or supervise on her daily procrastination here and here.
Please understand that Zoë cannot respond to ALL your questions – but never fear, there are readers that are bound to know the answers, so don’t be afraid to ask.
If Zoe has left you a little hair-obsessed this morning, then you should head on over to our sister site iVIllage for more hair tricks and tips than you can poke a burnt ceramic hair straightener at:
What are your tricks for fixing a bad hair day?