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kirsty 300x200 The Expat Files: whats it like living in the Middle East?

Kirsty in Qatar

It’s been a while since we last spoke to one of our expat readers so today we jet over to Qatar to hear from Kirsty who has been living in Doha for over a year.  I have always been fascinated by Middle Eastern countries and was interested to read about a real life in Qatar without “spin” or the stereotypes.

So over to Kirsty and Lana…(Lana is asking the questions, Kirsty is doing all the answering)

Where do you live?

I have lived in Doha, Qatar since 2009 My husband and I left Australia in 2000. We began our travels in Indonesia then on to  Malaysia, Libya, Canada, US and now Qatar. We have 4 children born in 4 different locations along the way.

What took to Qatar ?

We chose Qatar because of it’s enormous possibilities. After spending time in Asia, Africa and North America we thought we would like to try the Middle East. Qatar has experienced enormous growth in recent years. It’s a very exciting place to be.

How did you prepare for this move ?

I’ve gathered a little network of expat women and in the expat world everyone seems to know someone who knows someone who once lived somewhere. My husband came for a visit and looked at housing and schools and I contacted a couple of expat women groups with a list of questions. Apart from our usual truck load of vegemite we really didn’t bring anything else from home. There’s not too much that you can’t find here now.

What are the biggest cultural differences?

camel racing 300x225 The Expat Files: whats it like living in the Middle East?

camel racing

The moment you arrive the world looks very different from the Western world visually. The local men and women look amazing in their Thobes and Abayas. There is a mosque on every corner and the desert sun and moon feature prominently in the sky. I have marveled at so many gorgeous orange skies with a stunning setting sun. We arrived in November (beginning of winter) so dressing modestly wasn’t a challenge but in summer when daily temperatures are over 40 degrees I have had to really become creative with my wardrobe. I have a growing collection of scarfs to cover my shoulders.

What is the best thing about living in Qatar?

It feels very safe to live in Doha. Family is important here and children are seen as a blessing. I have found Qatari people to be very generous and friendly. My children attend a very multicultural International school where children of all races and religions learn and play together every day. I love going to school events and looking in to the crowd of parents, all in different cultural dress but all there for the same reason. Even though we are from Qatar, North America, Asia, Europe and Australia we are all doing the same thing….madly waving at our children and taking video and pictures with stupid proud grins on our faces. It makes you think of our similarities rather than our differences.

Have you adopted any Qatari customs  into your life?

We’ve certainly adopted a lot of the food. We love the hummus, tajines and kebeh found at the local restaurants. My husband is a regular at the fish markets each Friday morning (our weekend falls on Friday/Saturday). We love to spend time at the local souks and I recently smoked a shi sha pipe with a girlfriend in the main souk. I’m gradually finding my way around the fabric, gold and vegetable souks in town and love bartering for a bargain. I think I have also gained a lot of respect for the Abaya (an Arabic  cultural  garment essentially like a long robe) and find that I dress a lot more conservatively now.

What is most different about your life in Qatar compared to your old life in Australia?

I don’t pack my own groceries or put petrol in my car.  There is one sole provider for alcohol so definitely no stopping at Dan Murphy’s to pick up a bottle of wine on the way to dinner. The babysitter does my washing and ironing when my husband and I have a night out?!  We both miss our families terribly but skype has definitely changed our world. Having Granny or Grandma sing Happy Birthday along with us on the laptop as we blow out the candles of the cake doesn’t make her seem so far away.

How important do you feel it is to retain your “Aussie” status? 

It is extremely important to us. Only one of my four children was born in Australia and we moved her back to Jakarta when she was 11 days old. There is a term for my children “third culture kids” so we are well aware that they need a sense of belonging. They are all Australian passport holders and all think of themselves as Australian and we have worked very hard to make that happen. We always try for an extended visit home (2 months at a time) at least once a year. They can all sing the Australian Anthem, we go to Auskick on Friday mornings, watch Rugby and AFL, they are currently watching Australian Masterchef every night and listen to Australian audio books in the car. We have done the Hot Potato with the Wiggles in most Australian states as well as North America (they’re in Dubai next month and I’m seriously contemplating tickets). We celebrate Australia Day and have joined the ANZA Association here in Doha. There is a large Australian population in Doha and my guys have a lot of Australian and New Zealand friends.

kirsty family 300x200 The Expat Files: whats it like living in the Middle East?

The family.....and a camel

How have your children handled expat life?

My children do not know any other life. Their issue will be fitting in to a non expat life when the time comes.

I have had a children in Australia, Malaysia, Malta and Canada but I haven’t had a child in Doha.

Has it been easy to make friends ?

Very easy . There are a lot of groups and clubs to join and the children are always a great icebreaker.

Are the relationships very different?

Relationships are tremendously different. My friends in Australia are mostly from school or work and we all have strong commonalities eg. lived in the same areas, went to the same schools/clubs or worked in the same field. We share a history. My expat friends are all ages and nationalities. When you travel and find yourself making a connection with someone you tend to share information quickly. I’m not sure if it’s because there isn’t the history or because we can’t label people in their usual boxes. You rely on people enormously as you don’t have family to fall back on and we are all in the same boat.   I have girlfriends in all of our previous locations that have helped me through very personal situations. It’s always the hardest thing about leaving a country, the people you have to say goodbye to.

Looking in your handbag – do you see Australia or Doha?

The pictures of my children that were taken in a very close friends backyard remind me of Australia, as well as the mobile phone with the Aussie sim card that gets a kick start every time we return. I keep a scarf in my handbag at all times to cover up if I need to, that’s definitely a Doha reminder. I think we have 2 homes. Doha is school, work, daily routine and sport. Australia is family, holidays and a reminder of who we are.

Preparing dinner for the family – what is on the table?

A bit of both. My husband is an amazing cook and we’ve picked up a lot of dishes in our travels. I think our children are quite adaptable with spice after spending time in Asia. At least one night a week we’ll have local food (because it’s really easy) and I’ll do a spread with pita bread, hummus, a roast chicken, fresh summer vegetables and kebeh. I’m waiting to see how much our vegetable supply decreases as the heat sets in. I’m told to expect temperatures over 50 degrees when we get to August. My nine year old daughter makes a fabulous pavlova.

If someone was coming to visit from Australia what three things would you ask that they bring for you?

Freddo Frogs, Maggie Beer pate and the new tele-movie that Claudia Karvan was in on SBS.

What three things would you tell a prospective immigrant to Qatar to bring ?

An open mind,  patience for the first 2 months while you settle in and a great summer wardrobe that includes 20 pairs of bathers and something to cover your shoulders.

What do you miss most about Australia ?

I miss friends and family and being in the same time zone to make a quick call…… and drive through bottle stores (what a fabulous Australian invention).

What don’t you miss about Australia ?

The drought in my home town, I’m amazed and disappointed at how dry it is when I go home.

Have you travelled to Qatar? Any Middle Eastern country?

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62 Comments so far

  1. Laura

    Hi Kirsty, I’ve recently discovered and subscribed to mamamia and I was really delighted to find you as a writer on here, as I’m a fellow Aussie that’s just moved to Bahrain. I studied journalism back home, but have begun my writing career over here working for one of the magazines. I can completely relate to this article (and the others you wrote – especially about Christmas!) as I’ve been a third culture kid most of my life too. Thanks for sharing, I will be following your posts closely from now on!

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  2. Susan

    Hi Kirsty,
    I’m on the flip-side here, as someone that spent some of their latter childhood in the Sultunate of Oman during the mid-nineties.
    You are providing your kids with the oppportunity to see the world from a different perspective. Times were not always easy for me (as a 14 year old, I remember being on a border-watch with my Dad and being questioned by guards about what tampons were… and also have my ankle whacked by a stick held by a Mullah) but I’m grateful to my folks for affording me that opportunity and for broadening my horizons. It has definately defined me as an adult… I’m now a social worker working with Aboriginal people with mental health issues.
    Great article Mia (as per usual) and Kirsty

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    • Shamozal

      Hi Susan,

      Thank you so much for posting. I always love talking to people about their expat child experiences (my husband was also an expat child but he was back in Australia for high school).

      Have you been back to Oman? We are hoping to drive there from here (going through Saudi).

      I imagine your parents are very proud of the path you have taken (I would be). Thank you so much for your comments, very much appreciated.

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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  3. mags

    I have only been to Lebanon in the Middle East but I love it there!! Hopefully I will get a chance to expand my travel to Egypt, Qatar, Dubai and a few other places. I really enjoyed reading this expat file, it makes me want to pick and take the next flight out of here!

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  4. Mies.

    hi there,

    Iloved reading about your life, especially that you’ve lived in Libya. Where did you live? I lived there with my family on a compound just outside Benghazi in the late ’80′s as my dad was working there. Must be a very different place now!( we were there when it got bombed after Lockerbie happened)

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    • Shamozal

      Hi there,

      Wow! You lived outside Benghazi in the 80′s?! That would have been incredible. We were in Libya in 2002-2003, I had my 3rd child in Malta as things were a little tricky with blood screening etc so I just flew out the night before he was due. Did you go to Malta when you were in Libya?

      We lived in Tripoli, we chose not to live on a compound and we lived in a street off Gargaresh and just back from the beach. The vegetable man used to come every day with his truck loaded up and I would stand out on the road with the local ladies while they told me the names of things in Arabic and what I could do with them. Vegetables were completely seasonal and as it got hotter that were more and more sparse. I have so many funny memories about living in that house!

      I still miss Libya. We had a very simple life eg. no McDonalds or KFC, no party venues, rock climbing walls etc. Our life was visiting friends, going to the pool, the beach, the souk. No fancy hotels.

      We went home for Christmas in 2003, the children were 2 months, 16 months and 3 and we received a phone call on Christmas eve telling us we were moving to Canada. With the logistics of flying I stayed with my parents while my husband went back and packed up the house and moved on. One of my biggest regrets as I never felt I got to say goodbye to Libya. I’ll get back there though!

      Sorry to have prattled on! You just took me back to a place I hadn’t been for awhile. Lovely memories.

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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      • Mies.

        Hi! thank you for your reply, its great to hear from others who have lived in a country where so few foreigners have travelled!
        We used to fly in the once a week flight only from Amsterdam, with then an internal flight from Tripoli to Benghazi…On old russian airplanes, with people sitting in the aisles on the floor ..( they used to give out about 50% more boarding passes than there were allocated seats..) Quite the adventure I have to say. Also there wasn’t a lot of stuff in the shops because of the international boycott, we used to stock up on things when they were available. I remember my mum once buying like what seemed a years worth of washing powder, and walking into a department store the size of David Jones and only seeing stuffed koala’s on the shelves… truly a different world!
        I wish you all the best wherever you may end up living!

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  5. Tamara

    Hi Kirsty
    I am an Australian and my husband and 2 little children have just moved to Bahrain last week from Calgary. I loved reading your story (fun and positive) and look forward to reading future stories on your blog. (Your entry on your writing course made me laugh too).

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    • Shamozal

      Hi Tamara,

      We miss Calgary, we don’t miss the snow but we really miss our friends, we were there for 4 1/2 years (our longest stint anywhere). How are you finding Bahrain? A lot of expats in Qatar do weekenders in Bahrain as you have a few things that we don’t (alcohol in restaurants and bacon). It’s amazing how far you’ll go for bacon and eggs for breaky! Thanks for the comments on the blog, if you ever need/want to come to Qatar please contact me, it sounds like we already have quite a bit in common. My email address is kirsty@shamozal.com

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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    • Michelle

      Hi Tamara. We have been Bahrain now for almost 3 years. Come along to the Aust womens group (or the american one) and meet some people here. Also, there are newcomers coffee mornings at Budaiya and Juffair. Welcome!

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  6. DMK

    Qatar is amazing! The people are terribly nice. And I’ve been to Turkey, which is like a second home.

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    • Shamozal

      I agree, Qatar has a great feeling to it. We are a very close to Turkey here so fingers crossed we can make a trip. Any suggestions? Kirsty

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      • DMK

        Istanbul has some magnificent cultural locations like the Hagia Sophia which is lovely, or for just experiencing Turkish culture the smaller cities are the best.

        Also, the old Greek ruins near Izmir are amazing too.

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        • Shamozal

          Thanks for the tips!

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  7. Sydney4Women

    Thanks for sharing! I love reading real stories from real women not only celebrities are worth sharing!

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    • Shamozal

      My pleasure. I also really enjoyed reading the other expat posts. The grand plan (once I get in to a blogging pattern) is to write a few posts on some of the amazing expat women I have met eg my lovely friend Kimberley who lives here, runs 2 Aussie nursery schools and takes a group of 10 women each year to Ethiopia to visit Dr Hamiln Fistula clinic). Thanks again,

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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  8. Jenny Louise Gregg

    i love the expat posts!

    wow kirsty, you definitely are an inspiring woman – providing a wonderful opportunity for your four children to be citizens of the world.
    for anyone with a family, wanting to live abroad but is reluctant to make the move, you definitely paint a lovely picture of the world and what someone can do if they put their mind to it.
    all the best for you and your family kirsty.

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    • Shamozal

      Hi Jenny,

      That’s a very nice thing to say, I have sometimes had to bite my tongue or found myself justifying our lifestyle to others eg. when people tell me that they could never “mess their children around and move them from place to place”. I really appreciate your comments. As parents we are always doubting our choices. Thank you so much for taking the time to write.

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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      • Jenny Louise Gregg

        thanks kirsty. will head over and check out your blog.

        i think its just so fantastic and think you have nothing to doubt.

        i grew up in the country and never believed that i could travel overseas or even live in a big city! i’ve done both of those things now but didnt get the courage to do until my late 20s. i really believe that your children will have the confidence and ability to feel that they can achieve what they want in their lives because of the experiences you and your hubby have given them.

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        • Shamozal

          snap! I also grew up in a country town (South Australia) and I didn’t have a passport until my late twenties. My children are definitely living a very different childhood to mine.

          cheers,

          Kirsty

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          • Jenny Louise Gregg

            really!? that surprises me heaps. i just assumed (wrongly!) that you were one of those jet-setting types that you see arrive in london at 17, 18 years old. oh how wrong i was!

            i’m loving your blog.

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  9. Lolli

    Kirsty, you and your husband are an inspiration to all of us that have large families!!! Thank you for sharing this post with us! Both my sisters have been global nomads since their early twenties with one currently back home for a year to finish off a dual masters degree and the other only visiting home 4 times in the last 12 years and calling Prague her home city for the last 4 years! Your post resonated deeply with me as I have always used the excuse that my large family (5 kids) have kept me grounded at home and only holidaying over seas, but your post shows the only limitations traveling with a large family are the ones we choose to put on ourselves! You are giving your children so much more than just the opportunity to experience other cultures and should be so proud of yourselves as parents! Bravo!!

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    • Shamozal

      Thanks Lolli, very kind words. The logistics of traveling with 4 has been tricky, 5 may have just tipped me over the edge! ;-)

      Thanks again,

      Kirsty

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  10. LMM

    I loved reading this Kirsty, thanks for sharing.
    I was only today reading on Wikipedia about Bahrain (across the Gulf of Bahrain from Qatar) as I met a mother today at my daughters pre-school from there.
    You sound like such a wonderful adventurer and what a wonderful gift you are giving your children.
    I love these posts.

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    • Shamozal

      Thank you! I remember being on a plane a few years ago with a family that was based in Bahrain and now here we are only an hour or so away. There is talk that we will soon have a bridge between the two countries which would be fantastic. Thanks for your comments. I also have a small (very amateur) blog if you’re interested.

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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      • LMM

        Hi Kirsty,
        I read about the bridge on Wiki, that would be wonderful, I am sure.
        I will take a look at your blog.
        It was so great to read your post.
        All the best to you and your family.
        xo

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      • LMM

        ps- I wanted to ask you.
        How do you cope with being in Australia for 8 weeks at a time and then coming back. I do the same, but have recently found the transition tougher and tougher?

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        • Shamozal

          So far so good. We went back to Australia in mid June and returned to Doha mid August (for the beginning of the new school year). I found as much as the children were sad to be leaving Australia they were keen to get back and see their friends at school. Most of our activities are done at the school campus after hours eg. Swimming Club, Basketball, Gymnastics etc so the children were keen to get back to those things.

          For myself, I find that I have to lay low for the first few days that I’m back as I do find it hard to say goodbye to my family and old friends. There’s always that period of adjustment over the first week where I am a little melancholy for Australia and it’s comforts and familiarities. After a few days though I’m usually happy to be back in a routine with the children and appreciating some of the things I have here that I don’t have in Oz eg. someone doing my ironing!

          Where are you living?

          Kirsty
          http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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          • LMM

            Yes I understand that feeling of melancholy but then over the past few years every time I come back to the US, I feel a sense of home here now. It’s a funny feeling having two homes. My last trip home was for 7 weeks, without my husband. I missed him alot but I had no idea my 4 year old daughter would be so blue without him around. I think she thought she’d never see him again, she was almost in mourning. It was sad and made me realise we cannot go home again for that long without Daddy. Easy fix I guess is to move back!!

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  11. Clare M

    Really enjoy these expat posts…Thanks

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  12. Anna

    Hi Kirsty,
    Loved to hear your story. I have just come back from Jordan last weekend, where we celebrated our daughter’s engagement and “sort of” marriage to a Jordanian. They are currently living in Dubai and plan to settle mostly in Aus.

    We had a most wonderful experience meeting our new extended family and learning the cultural differences.
    We have also traveled and lived in different countries earlier in our married life. It is such a great opportunity and experience to live in other cultures.
    And what a wonderful way for your children to grow up with such wider experiences.

    Hope you enjoy your grand final fun at the Hyatt.

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    • Shamozal

      Helen,

      I am green with envy on your trip to Jordan, we have it on our wish list of travel destinations. It must have been amazing (and a tad emotional I imagine) watching your daughter get “sort of” married in those surroundings. How lucky they are to be based in Dubai, what a great place. We spent a bit of time in Dubai when we were living in Libya, loved it.

      Thanks for your lovely comments,

      Kirsty
      http://shamozal.blogspot.com/

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      • Anna

        Kirsty,

        Lovely to hear back from you, and I think that Qatar must be such an interesting place to me, although quite different to Jordan.

        If you go to Jordan, you must go down to Wadi Rum (near Petra) and sleep under the stars with the Bedouins. I can just imagine that your children would love it.

        We are heading back there in April for the wedding, and hope to travel much more in the area.

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  13. Leah Dwyer

    Love the expat files.
    I lived in Israel for about 3 and a half years. On 3 different kibbutzim for two and a half years and then in Haifa at the University there for one year. It was a very exciting time for me. I learned Hebrew and Arabic. I travelled from the top to the bottom and somehow managed to survive the first Gulf war as well. That was strange and a bit scarey.

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  14. CanberraMel

    I love these articles, thanks for sharing.

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    • CB

      same, i really enjoy hearing how others find new cultures and the whole expat experience. we live in the states for 13 years, and it was a bit of a culture shock when we returned to oz after so long

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  15. anon

    I absolutely loved Dubai. I could live there tomorrow. The people are amazing and it is a wonderful respectful peaceful gorgeous place.

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  16. lorraine

    would love to know how you get into auskick in doha? loved your story am living here too

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    • Shamozal

      Hi Lorraine,

      Auskick is on Fridays mornings at Aspire Park. They stopped in late April (because of the heat) and an email went out in the past week asking for volunteers and talking about a start date. It is run entirely by volunteers and the children receive a football and bag (all sponsored by NAB). We are heading off tomorrow morning to watch the Grand Final at the Hyatt, will I see you there? If you would like to email me kirsty@shamozal.com I can give you the current contact details for Auskick. K

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  17. lorraine

    would love to know how you get into auskick in doha? loved your story am living here top

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  18. cuz1

    My husband makes copper bracelets and we were thinking of moving to Doha also. Do you think there’s many opportunities for that sort of business?

    I loved your story. Thanks for sharing.

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  19. Pop

    This was great! Thanks so much for sharing your wonderful story. I loved Doha, too. Thr Islamic art museum is AMAZING – worth it for the architecture alone. Have you been there yet?

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    • Shamozal

      Hi Pop,

      Yes we have been to the Islamic Art Museum and you’re absolutely right, the building is just stunning isn’t it! My parents were telling me they saw a doco on the ABC recently on Pei the architect who built it. How long were you here for?

      Kirsty

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  20. Karin

    Thanks for sharing!

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  21. Anonymous

    I would have liked to know what they do for work which enables them to live in so many places. It’s not like you can just swan in, declare “here I am” and everything flows on from there.

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    • Shamozal

      Hi there,

      Thanks for reading, you’re right I probably should have included what we do. I work in HR and recruitment (although having had 4 children in the past 10 years my work has been on and off). I now write a blog http://shamozal.blogspot.com. My husband worked for a global firm for the first 11 years of our travels, he worked in software development. The company he worked for is known for moving people all over the world (sometimes with a couple of weeks notice). He now works in Marketing for a large Gas company. Most of the Aussies we know who have experienced a similar life work for larger companies in Accounting, Law, Journalism, Oil field services, Construction etc.

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    • Nora

      Woah that sounds a bit harsh to me. There a plenty of situations in which the opportunity to travel and work all over the world are accomodated! open your mind!

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      • Apples

        Agreed i don’t think anyone would assume you just ‘swan in’, obviously quite likely you would be working for a company that facilitated your move, the person writing the expat files doesn’t have to tell us everything for the piece to be insightful and enjoyable. (Although with so many people holding more than one passports these days sometimes you can just ‘swan in’ and say here i am! i did when i moved oseas using a second passport and citizenship of another country. )

        Enjoyable expat files thank you

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        • MadisonC

          Agreed! And its surprising the jobs that will take you round the world. I started as a Store Manager in a retail brand and ended up living in Dubai manaaging the Middle East region.
          Didn’t pick I’d be doing that at all!
          There was no swanning….but hey I wish there was!

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  22. Tea

    This is my favourite expat files yet :) Love it!

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    • Shamozal

      you’ve just made my day! Thank you so much.

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    • mags

      I agree!

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  23. Kathy

    Great read, very interesting and admirable that you can make a home in so many different places.

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    • Shamozal

      thanks! I’ve been trying to record a few of our travels on the blog http://shamozal.blogspot.com/ . Thanks for being so nice with your comments. Kirsty

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      • Nora

        Just read your blog and loved it! will be checking back in on your adventures, you sound like a very lovely person and great mother.

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        • tash

          Kirsty is a wonderful person and mum. The whole family is missed so much by their friends in Calgary.

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  24. Bejazzled

    This was really good to read. My partner & I are exploring the option of living overseas, he has an EU passport, but we have considered Middle East. Not sure if I could adapt to the heat though!

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    • Mary V

      I;m with you, the heat would be a deal breaker for me.

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      • MadisonC

        its surprisingly tolerable (said she who once visited dubai wearing a long sleeved wool jumper on a 44 degree day!).
        totally different kind of heat.

        and AWESOME air con!

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        • Lulu

          I’ve only been to Dubai twice (stopover, because flying Emirates to Europe), but even the few minutes between airport & shuttle bus, and shuttle bus & plane were more than hot enough.

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    • Shamozal

      I’m sure you’d be fine! It is particularly hot from about July – September but the weather is cooling off now. We arrived in November and it was stunning. We were swimming until New Years and back in the pool in about March. If you are thinking of traveling and working abroad I would highly recommend both Asia and the Middle East. Thanks for your lovely comments. Kirsty

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  25. Rara

    Interesting – I like the sound of the souks, they sound so exotic and exciting. I would love to go there and experience it. Thanks for teaching me a bit more about Qatar to add to my limited knowledge of it.

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