.
And here we are again, on the tail end of the week and taking the time to look back and see how it all went.
The bests, the worsts, the I’m-not-exactly-sure-how-to-classify-that-yets.
It’s also a Mamamia staple where you get to see our community in action. Supportive, reflective, helpful. So leave a comment if you’re so inclined and check in on our other readers. You might be pleasantly surprised.
As for me, I’ve been sinking my teeth into some splendid mediocrity this week. By that, I mean I’ve done nothing out of the ordinary which – to someone who adores routine – is a wonderful thing.
Best: Our intrepid Associate Editor and eBook publishing maestro Rebecca Sparrow had her baby! I’m totally not a baby person usually but knowing Bec and knowing how much this little fella meant to her and then seeing him right there beside her made me very happy and goosebumpy. But everyone else thinks I have a hardened heart so, in order to keep that rumour going, we will never speak of this again.
My other best is somewhat unremarkable. I finally got my writing mojo back this week. I’ve been working on my own super-happy-mega-fun-time writing project in the after hours of my, you know, day job. Which for a small part of last year went really well and then I started a chapter which I didn’t like and rather than do what a normal person would do, like FIX IT, I just stopped opening the file and left it mostly untouched for three months and then whined about how terrible my life was in coffee shops while my friends looked at their watches. But all that is GONE now because I had a little spark of inspiration after I begged for it and what do you know, I’m writing again!
Worst: I mentioned this before but it bears repeating: I have so much on in the next two months. SO much. And I shall reveal a little bit of science for us all now: things cost money. Boo. I’m about as good at budgeting as Greece is at the moment, so we’ll see how that works out.
Anyhow, enough about me. That’s not why we’re here.
How are you going? What’s on your mind, what are the bests and worsts of your week?
 on http://www.mamamia.com.au){kind=link}
Comments
359 Comments so far
loading...
omm and hoping for some advice……
our little boy (11 weeks) has been diagnosed as lactose intolerance (from birth but only recently tested and confirmed). i have been advised by the pediatrician to add lacteeze drops to his milk to help his system deal with the lactose in my breast milk. this seems to be working so far (only 2 days in!) but the process of doing this is a little inconvenient. basically before every feed i have to hand express 2-3 tablespoons worth of breast milk into a sterile bottle, add the drops, wait five minutes, feed him this and then continue with a breast feed as normal.
as you can imagine it’s okay when i’m at home (although it sucks to have to steralise all of those bottles and i have to admit i don’t rock at hand expressing!) but out and about it’s a bit of a nightmare. if there are no alternatives obviously i’ll stick it out but does anyone know of, or have experience with this issue and therefore can offer alternative solutions?
cheers
loading...
can you not just drop it directly into his mouth? not before his feed but between sides maybe? or is there a reason to wait five minutes? have you tried calling the ABA line, they might have a better idea.
good-luck
loading...
i rang the lacteeze help line because i thought the same but it has to be in the milk because of the ph level…all the benefit of it would be destroyed on the tongue and in stomach before it made it to the gut if i just drop it in directly.
someone could make a fortune inventing an easier alternative i swear!!
loading...
sorry that was rude of me, thanks heaps for your suggestion though rainbow!
x
loading...
not at all! i thought there must be some reason for it to be so fiddly. can you pre-prepare it for when you go out, or does it have to be given straight away?
i would be tempted to just miss it when you are out at the shops for example but do it every other time… but i am not sure how bad his symptoms would be if you did that.
good-luck
loading...
best: yesterday was my 24th birthday and i had a really good day, considering i had to work. to celebrate – on my way to dinner with the bf and he detours to the beach, sits me down, gets on one knee and proposes! I was not expecting it at all (even though we always talk about getting married). a birthday to remember!
worst: my ring is too big =( so have been wearing it with paper towel wedged under it :S, so i can show my friends and family tonight.
worst 2: go away rain!
loading...
Worst: Tough week at work- spent the past 2 weeks making resources, timetabling sessions , planning and making more resources…and still haven’t finished much work despite bringing work home. Felt overwhelmed and ended up going a bit hysterical on Tuesday.
Best: It’s the weekend and I can relax! Looking forward to next week when I get to work with my students again (I’m a speechie at a specialist school).
loading...
Best: my son appears to be pulling himself out of his emotional slump. He’s previously refused offers of help and has “shed” most of his dodger friends. He even helped out around the house and yard voluntarily (I nearly fell over).
We have bought a spare bed cheap and a reclining couch, so that I have somewhere else to try to sleep while sitting up. It’s so comfy.
I’ve been feeling a lot stronger and am starting to walk now.
Worst: being unable to drive for another month. I’m starting to get antsy being stuck at home now.
loading...
Best: new job/ phd off to a good start. My supervisor so lovely and making me feel good about the work we’ll do. Super nice people all around, a clean office (some of the possibilities were pretty gross), how odd to be where I want to be.
Best 2: my daughter’s so gorgeous, even in grouchiness, and so ready to laugh.
Best 3: won a prize ( and won’t put this as worst but part of prize is a public presentation. This seems like booby prize to shy me!)
No worsts, just petty problems that don’t bear a mention
OMM : lovely photos of Bec. Very happy for Bec and her family.
loading...
I love this time of week! I sit down with a cup of tea and read everyones submissions
Best: I have a job interview on Wednesday, I’ve lost 3 kgs since Jan and since going off the Pill I’ve stopped being a grumpy bitch and turned into a much nicer and happier person!
Worst: having literally no money, so having to be a hermit and spend my days looking for jobs. no going out, coffees or dinners! can’t even afford bus fares boooooo
OMM: I miss London and my teaching assistant job so much. Going through photos made me uber nostalgic. Want to fast forward to 4 years from now so I can head back over there quick smart and start teaching for real this time!
loading...
I’d like to start with the worst, seeing as it just happened, and I’m having a bit of a cry, so writing it down might help. I have worked in a volunteer capacity on a management committee on a child care centre, and have been negotiating the certified agreement for the staff. Child care workers are chronically underpaid, and we’ve done the absolute best we can to overcome that. I have personally worked really hard over months – to the point where I’ve missed spending time with my kids and have given up hobbies to try and get this to work. I was SO proud, we managed to come up with a 21% pay rise for the majority of the staff. I was so excited to take them the offer. 21% is amazing. But they basically said the offer wasn’t fair and asked how they could get more. I am beyond gutted. I now have to go back to the drawing board to come up with a different offer, with no extra money to draw on. This process has given me terrible insomnia and stress-related problems, and it just goes on and on.
Best: Bec’s baby news is awesome. My kids are awesome. My husband tried to make fructose free merange (sp?) tonight to cheer me up. It was a total flop, but he’s awesomer for trying.
OMM: how to get through this without losing the plot.
loading...
Just wanted to say good job for getting the 21% in the first place!
loading...
they must be getting advice to say they can get more?
it sounds like you would be justified in saying that you have done what you can, and that you can no longer devote the same level of time to this.
loading...
Thanks for your comments ink and rainbow, it’s nice to know someone is listening.
I was so happy with the 21%. Sigh. It’s highly possible they’ve had advice as they’re in a highly unionised workplace. However we are offering 30% above award rate, so they can hardly complain that they’re poorly off!!! I am hoping to get some quick resolution. I’ve just stayed up until 1am working on a counteroffer as I knew I’d never sleep tonight with it hanging over my head. I’m off to bed – fingers crossed for sleep.
loading...
Hi, I have been in a similar position and it is extremely difficult trying to find the right balance for all. Especially when there isnt an endless pit of money to draw from.
Is there a high staff turnover? Is there a culture amongst the staff of leaving as soon as they dont get their own way or are they dedicated? Are you prepared to stand your ground or is it worth trying to find a bit more (from God knows where) just to keep that status quo? Perhaps if they are long term staff worth keeping happy you might have to consider putting fees up? Parents are never happy about that, and support from committee is often tricky if they dont fully understand the finances and cant put their personal position aside, but sometimes its an evil necessity to keep the staff who are caring for their kids to be rewarded at a rate they feel is fair. Or you could resign if its all too hard, which I fully understand.
Good luck. x
loading...
hi anon for same reason
The balance is really challenging! There is a fair staff turnover, but that is common in the industry. There is not a culture of leaving if they don’t get their own way, luckily. We already put the fees up $8-10 this year for parents, which is quite a bit. I’ve finessed the budget a bit and have hopefully come up with an option that gives slightly less salary increase but extra leave, which is something they wanted. We’ll wait and see which one they go for. My husband has been encouraging me to resign from the committee but I’m determined to see this through. Hopefully it wont be much longer now!
loading...
Best: Started teaching swimming this week (on prac) and it was amazing and a bit hilarious as well- watching my four students splash down the lane like little washing machines I had to think, did I *really* look like that in Stage Three?
Worst: I’m not sure if I have one! It’s tough to think of a Worst when one hears of Bec’s little bub
OMM: The tingly feeling in my legs… I sat on a friend’s bed a few weeks ago and it collapsed (it was already broken!!) and I shot straight downwards and jolted the shit out of my lower back… I couldn’t walk, couldn’t move and it hurt for days. Now it’s back and my legs are tingly which probably means there’s nerve damage. YAY. I’M SO EXCITED.
loading...
Best: finally getting the guts up to join mamamia community. love reading / browsing this site.
Worst: having to look for a part time job when I don’t want to return to paid work til by 2nd child is 2. always said would be at home til she was 2 but lack of money has ruined that.
constant battle with depression always around. 20 years now and on medication which helps and see great psychiatrist but it is a daily struggle. have 2 gorgeous girls, lovely husband, but it is hard to get thru each day keep telling myself it will pass….not sure when. wonder how much is in the genes. i need to start to exercise for my mental health. i know that will help. just not got the energy to do so. 2nd child not a great sleeper.
loading...
Maybe getting some part-time work will help with the exercise too; if not a physically demanding job at least walking from train etc…
Sounds like you are doing the best you can under difficult circumstances.
Take care xx
loading...
I make myself have to go to the shops every day or something so I HAVE to go out. It helps not having a car too. If you live a reasonable distance for things like that, it’s good. I am not a “go for a walk” type of person – I find it boring, but if I have to walk to the shops/post office/childcare, I don’t mind doing it. And I feel better afterwards!
loading...
Best: being 10 weeks pregnant
Worst: being 10 weeks pregnant and being way to sick to cope with anything. I’m soooo nauseous that I’m not able to look after my oldest very well and am increasing her days at childcare, I haven’t done any housework,my to do list is enormous and not getting done, I had to get my partner to take a day off work when my daughter was too sick for daycare one day. I had a great first pregnancy with minimal morning sickness but I feel so guilty and useless and like billions of women have coped with pregnancy, why can’t I do anything. I’ve tried all the morning sickness remedies but nothing works.
loading...
Hang in there Wendy! With my third pregnancy I was so unwell that for four months I piled all clean washing into our spare room. It became the closet. We dressed in there! If I knew how, I would find the picture I have of the pile (imagine all the clothes four people own on the floor in one room) and post it here, it would make you feel better. Do what you can do and don’t worry about the rest. Nobody died from a messy house! If you can afford it, get a cleaner to help you through! Good luck!
loading...
Congratulations! Sure its not twins?
loading...
I’m hearing you – it’s horrible! The only thing that temporarily helped my nausea and vomiting was copious amounts of Coca Cola – not healthy for me or baby but it was desperate times…
Have you tried the acupressure sea sickness wrist bands? They did help me a little. Just a thought.
Yes, no one dies from a messy house, just take care of yourself.
loading...
Oh big hugs to you. I know how that feels. if nothing is working you may have hyperemis gravidarum (bad morning sickness). Being told I had that was a huge weight lifted because it wasn’t me being lazy or not coping – it is an illness. Unfortunately it doesn’t go away until the baby comes out but still
Go and see your doctor and see if you can get some maxalon, or better still zofran (it’s just very expensive).
And be kind to yourself. Not everyone glows during pregnancy. Alot of us find it tough going and just awful. It’s just that no-one really talks about that yucky side of it.
loading...
Best #1: Hung out friends a lot this week (which is rare for me), had a really good time on each and every occasion; went to a festival, concert in a park, spontaneously visited the zoo, brunch …. Really made me realise the importance of having friends and maintaining friendships, I am really going to make an effort at uni this year to meet people and hopefully build new friendships while maintaining old ones.
Best #2: Baby Fin, I have never met Bec but am just so elated for her and her family!!
Worst: Weight-loss is still stagnant, am going to carry-on though and not give up! Just wish you can go from beginning weight to goal weight by waving a magic wand, unfortunately can’t!
loading...
Worst : being very disorganised trying to juggle part time job that is becoming nearly full time, children, husband who works long hours, being on various school/community committees etc.
Best: I love doing all of the above things but my lack of organisation means that I end up running myself ragged and forgetting stuff.
I would LOVE LOVE LOVE MM to do a post asking people for their tried and true strategies/tips/tricks to getting organised and not forgetting to do stuff.
loading...
Best: I put myself first this week so i could exercise. It was fun. House is a mess, few groceries in the house, but I achieved what I wanted. Yay me.
Worst: Gastro hit me last night. Now wiped out. Typical response to any exercise. Over coping with the family when I’m sick.
OMM: Would anyone have any suggestion regarding a book about multiculturalism for a four year old?
I’d like to work on this with her. She’s having trouble understanding why asian-looking people (for example) aren’t necessarily from asia (even though she has an asian aunt). And at this age they seem to notice how different people are from themselves (eg tall men suddenly become scary, obese people are scary, small statured people are still kids etc). Anyway, she said yesterday ” I don’t want to make black skin friends, I only want to make white skinned friends” . So I want to work on that with her. I did have a couple such books for my eldest, but I can’t find them or remember what they were called. Any suggestions?
loading...
A couple of suggestions: “I love my hair”, by Natasha Anastasia Tarpley
“Grandfather Counts”, by Andrea Cheng
“Shades of Black” by Sandra Pinkney
“God’s Dream” Desmond Tutu
“Fair Skin Black Fella” Renee Fogorty
“We are One” Jennifer Black
Hope this is of use!
loading...
Brilliant! Thank you.
loading...
My kids have got ‘The little refugee’ by Anh and Suzanne Do. It is a seriously fantastic book. Its a kids version of the adult book ‘The Happiest Refugee’
loading...
Does your daughter like dolls? Would it be worth getting her a doll from a different ethnicity? You can get ones of all appearances – and often they are, um, anatomically correct – so maybe a new dark-skinned doll (with Afro hair if you want!) could help?
I am a big fan of learning through books – definitely go down that path – but I also kinda like the two-pronged approach
loading...
best: me. venting.
worst: on this madness! http://youtu.be/kl1ujzRidmU
mamamia..you should really post this story..
loading...
Ok, I just watched the entire thing, and I’m feeling….grossed out.
Horrible. He just did a really crappy thing to his child. Aren’t teenagers allowed to be bratty, spoilt little buggers occasionally and vent to their friends?? And her Dad’s just put a massive unfillable wedge between her relationship with him. I think he’s a misguided fool. To be honest. And I have a teenage daughter..I understand his hurt and disappointment in what she wrote, but I think he’s just backfired bigtime.
loading...
Best – Bec’s news – the arrival of Finlay.
Best 2 – Going away for the weekend, just an overnighter at the Coast but so looking forward to it.
Worse – Went in for what’s called an “egg pick up” (Part of the IVF process) and didn’t get very far. Eggs couldn’t be picked up because my doctor was a bit out with the timing for the “trigger shot”. Very frustrating and puts me back a couple of weeks. On the plus side it becomes a “cancelled cycle” so my $7000 gets credited for my next go which will be next week.
OMM – At nurses suggestion, went home after supposed “egg pick up” and had ahem, some action with husband – we knew there were some eggs floating around – well you just never know and miracles do happen!
loading...
How frustrating.
It would be great indeed if you had a suprise in the next few weeks!
loading...
Good luck with those floating eggs Gypsy – crossing fingers for good news for you!
loading...
thank you. I quite like the notion of floating eggs so I’m sending them some good energy.
loading...
Oh dear that is really not good at all. I would be furious. I have been thinking about you all week hoping for some good news. Here’s to floating eggs. Hope you have a nice weekend away.
loading...
I am in such a bad mood at the moment i cant even think of bests and worsts!
Its just all going wrong today
none of my clothes fit right, i’m having a bad hair day, I have no one to go see Taylor Swift with, work is being sucky and I’m super scared im gonna fail at doing the 12WBT.
Sorry for my rant but i had to get it out!
loading...
If it is any consolation kristalilly, I did the fitness test for 12WBT this morning, it took me 15 minutes to walk 1k. We can only do our best.
loading...
oh I’m super scared about 12WBT too. Really.
Fact is, I don’t get scared easily, but this has me nervous as hell.
So I’m telling myself over and over, to just keep going and not give up.
It’s going to have benefits no matter what I think.
loading...
I am another scared person doing the 12wbt and I am worried I am going to buggar it up and get sick of it. (low attention span).
Hoping that I push through and stick with it like everyone doing it.
Good luck to you!
loading...
Best: daughter is having an extra long afternoon sleep after we had a fun morning together at playgroup, the house is moderatey clean and I’m actually doing some of the ‘i’ll get to it eventually’ jobs in between catching up on MM
Worst turned Best: Was under a black cloud at the start of the week. Have been coping pretty well with recent losses but it kind of built up the last couple weeks. Fortunately i was able to ask for and get time off work with one days notice and on wednesday the massive weight of the cloud lifted.
I was so scared of falling into depression having been there before and could hear my thoughts heading that way so now I am just so so so relieved to be ok that I am just really happy.
loading...
Best: I started my teaching job today with two students…oh, how I have MISSED it! Now I know what I was meant to do. I also did some testing for a job in marking (for the US equiv of NAPLAN), and the tests were all logic sequences and matching correct names/numbers quickly and accurately, something I can do very well, my brain just works that way. Yay!
Worst: Still have un-baby blues. Although after talking with the husband the other night (after breaking down about it!!) we thought that maybe we could try now since I’m not working full time anyway, and that will prevent the need to take time off when we return to Australia, so possibly it might be three years earlier than thought. So that’s kind of a tentative best.
OMM: In the instance we decide to go ahead, I thought I might start taking pre natal vitamins now, but I am the world’s most pathetic pill taker. As in, I just can’t. Even my Pill gets swished around before I can swallow it! It’s all in my head, I could do it years ago no problems, but then choked on a massive iron tablet and threw up all over a friend’s kitchen, haven’t been able to do it since. Does anyone know if hypnotherapy can help something like this? It is such an embarrassing problem, and I just want to get over it already!
loading...
Have you tried taking pills with something other than water? Not very healthy, but I find taking big pills with softdrink helps them go down easier. Something to do with the bubbles I guess!
loading...
Or pills with yoghurt…sounds strange but I learnt it from my clinician!
loading...
hypnotherapy can definitely help with something like this. I’m a hypnotherapist and have helped clients with similar problems (eg gagging on toothbrushes etc).
loading...
Best: taking myself to the movies tonight. Hot date with myself and I can’t wait!
Worst: I’m having the worst hair day ever!!
loading...
I’m sure your date won’t mind about your hair, so just go with it and have fun
loading...
Ha! thanks Odette… my hot date didn’t care about my hair at all! She is however feeling very sick now from too much popcorn and frozen coke!
loading...
Glad you had a good time. I love going to the movies alone
loading...
I don’t think your other best is unremarkable whatsoever! If your “super-happy-mega-fun-time writing project” is a book (books have chapters, right?) then I am super happy and excited myself!!
I would love to read a book written by you, Rick, I bet it (or whatever it is!) will be awesome!
No pressure though. haha
loading...
I shall bottle you and keep you as my muse then! Thank you! x
loading...
“Yes, Master, whatever you wish, Master”
*folds arms, blinks twice*
loading...
Best: after stalking the MM community I have signed up! Big step for me, coz Im not really a sharer, but you guys are so incredibly funny and some posts have touched me, and I wanted in!
Extremely happy for Bec and her beautiful lil boy
Worst:Last week I spontaneously resigned from my job. Big thing as i am NEVER spontaneous, always plan 3 years in advance! I was great at my job, loved the company I worked for, but my manager was HARD work, and I copped the brunt. First day back after 3 weeks holidays and she pushed me too far, and I up and left. I have now been invoiced for nearly 2 grand, as they are saying I needed to give 6 weeks leave, not the 4 which I was led to believe. So now I have no job and a 1700 bill from an employer that makes 8 bill in profit
But i still have my ethics, moral and dignity in tact….just never knew it came with such a high price tag….
OMM: Considering if i REALLY want to jump straight into another full time job, or should I just temp for awhile and consider my options?!?
loading...
Welcome! (PS: Am I funny? You should tell Mia, Lana, Nicky, Nat and Lucy if so. They don’t believe me).
Anyhow, I once spontaneously resigned from a job and it was the BEST thing I ever did. They were awful and I didn’t enjoy it. Have never looked back. Well done!
loading...
6 weeks is rubbish! The Fair Work Act lays out how much notice you have to give:
http://www.fairwork.gov.au/termination/notice-periods/pages/default.aspx
In short, the most you need to give is 4 weeks if you have been employed for over 5 years.
I recommend contacting the Fair Work Ombudsman on 13 13 94 to get them to help you if you are worried.
PS are you under a contract? Fair Work Act usually prevails when you have concerns…..
Good luck, and do not let them walk over you that is ridiculous!
loading...
Thanks Laura! I have just emailed them with my info. Heres hoping some common sense can prevail! I wouldnt mind so much except I was pushed into having 3 weeks leave just prior as I had too much accrued! Day 1 of return to work, and it happened…..
And yes Rick, i find you most amusing
Thanks Lucy!
loading...
Hi There,
Sucks about the invoice but they could be right! 4 weeks is the standard but some companies can do longer if they have it put into their employee contracts. I recommend digging out a copy of the contract to see what the notice period is and if you don’t have a copy you are well within your rights to request one from the HR team.
If doesn’t state any notice period take it to fair work but if they have it in writing then you may have to pay that invoice
Long notice periods suck— I had a 12 week one for one role I was in!!!!
loading...
Welcome to the dinner table!!
loading...
Best: had my radiosurgery this week for my brain tumour. It went really well. I seemed to have avoided any serious side effects (seizures, brain swelling etc). I even think some of my symptoms are slightly reduced already.
Worst: my immune system is shot. A head cold that has been lurking all week is now a full blown sinus infection. I haven’t stopped coughing since last night (I didn’t get to sleep until 4am). I so tired but I can’t sleep because I can’t stop coughing. I’m now on antibiotics so hopefully they work soon.
Worst: found out earlier in the week that I have to pay the radiation bill in full to get the money back from medicare. Thats $15,500 I have to pay. ouch. (and then claim the safety net from medicare).
Best: all the words of support I’ve been getting. It means so much.
loading...
Always in our thoughts. Glad the radiosurgery went so well.xxxx
loading...
Thanks Lana
loading...
owwwww the medicare system is really not user friendly sometimes!
Glad it went well xx
loading...
Can you put it on your credit card? We did this with IVF bill, and got points!
loading...
Oh definitley, sadly not the one with points though – the one with rewards doesn’t have a big enough limit
maybe we should juggle a few things. hmmm.
It works just like all the IVF stuff, I just got a bit of a shock at the actual amount.
loading...
Yay, fabulous news about the radiosurgery, not so good about the cost! Hope you get some sleep soon xx
loading...
Thanks so much for thinking of me. I saw your other comment just then.
loading...
glad it went well.
have you thought about asking the radiology place if they can bulk bill?
they might consider it.
have you tried a vapouriser for your cough? not sure if it would be contraindicated with the radiotherapy, also get a zillion pillows and sleep as upright if you can if you aren’t already.
loading...
Thanks. There is no point in bulk billing because – wait for it – the medicare schedule is only $1800! That is all. So I could get them to put it through medicare first, then I have to pay the gap of $13,000, then take that to medicare to claim the safety net so it is alot easier to just pay it all. I am shocked that that is all medicare covers for something so huge. Yes it was only about an hour of treatment all up but there were 4 staff there the whole time, plus the specialist, plus the machine itself which had two whole large rooms just to house it. Anyway, we’ll make do, we always find a way
Oh and today the cough has moved into my chest. My ribs hurt from coughing but I did get a bit more sleep last night. I’m coming to the realisation that these next few weeks are going to be hard. Really hard.
loading...
On my mind – the floods. The waters are finally receding so hopefully I will be able to get of the farm on Monday, for the first time in 14days.
Best – appreciating that things could have been a lot worse for us, our house is safe, our family are safe. Does the rest really matter?
Worst – my poor friends down the road who were choppered from their place by the SES before the water broke the levy bank and flooded their house. Looking at our ruined summer crops still sitting in 50 cm of water.
loading...
Gee floods are just so awful aren’t they Mel! And that is shitful about the summer crops.
We lost a lot of crop before Christmas and the rest we could get on was downgraded to the max so we just left it to rot in the paddock.
The only upside to a flood is that full profile of moisture for winter crops will be there.
Hang in there!
loading...
Thanks happymum!
We also had the floods through in December. This is our 3rd flood in 15 months but it is still significantly better than the drought.
Yes – full profiles are definately a positive and winter crops aren’t that far away!
loading...
BEST: I only have four shifts left at my job before I leave. Am trading in my stressful, full-of-bullshit, zillion hours a week job for a better-paid, no shift-work role in a similar industry. Can’t wait. Also, I have not had annual leave since June last year (worked right through Christmas, including Xmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year’s Day) and I am DYING for my two weeks off inbetween jobs. I am so tired, it’s ridiculous.
BEST 2#: My boyfriend works for himself from homeand every year during the week of Valentine’s, he has this huge deadline that makes our lives a misery for six weeks beforehand. He works all night until 4 or 5am in the morning, our house is a disaster and he basically doesn’t have any life at all for six weeks. Only a few days until it is over.
WORST: I really need to get some enthusiasm back for exercise. My weight is fairly stable but I can feel my pants getting slightly tighter. Just can’t summon up any energy at the moment. Am hoping the change in job and reduction in hours will help things.
loading...
Worst: Just read that Zoe Foster will no longer be doing videos. I loved those videos they gave me so much inspiration. I think the hair one was a standout. But she is a very clever, funny writer so still looking forward to Thursdays.
Best: Applied for a thing called JET (Jobs, employment &Training). If I get approved I will get free child care all this year while I am at uni. As a single mum that will be a HUGE help.
OMM: We whinge about our government a lot but really we are so lucky to be living where we live. I am realising this a lot as I am a newly single mum and have been relying on Centrelink a lot to get by. I can’t imagine what I would be doing if I lived in a country that doest have the assistance I am getting.
loading...
Best: Bought some new clothes I feel fabulous in, and getting ready to start Uni. I’m nervous but ready to take this next next step in my young life.
Worst: I’ve fallen hard for someone I met a little while ago. He says he likes me very much, but is scarred from a previous long relationship which ended badly. He admitted he is worried about getting hurt or hurting me by rushing into a new relationship ( he has been single for nearly a year now)and wants to take it slow and ‘see where things go’.
I’m afraid i’m going to be left waiting but I pray things fall into place.
loading...
Be very very careful, men who aren’t over past relationships are a danger sign. Good luck.
loading...
Best: Everything really. Just loving life at the moment, anxiety not withstanding.
Best #2: I started a blog! I really like writing and this is something I can show to my kids when they grow up. I was writing letters but tbh my handwriting sucks. At the moment the only people who I let read my blog are my immediate family, but maybe one day I’ll share it with the world!
No worst this week. Love to all doing it tough.
loading...
Thats primarily why I started my blog, for my children. Due to health reasons I thought it a good idea to”let it all out” just in case. One day I may share it too.
loading...
Best, kids all settled into term 1. Ticked off many jobs on my to-do list
Worst, my feelings have been trodden on by quite a few people this morning. Just trying to shake it off and enjoy the afternoon.
loading...
Best: Am a very proud aunty to a gorgeous chubby bubby courtesy of my sister in law. Mum and baby home and doing well, just hope the “issues” her and her partner have with the shared care of his daughter don’t get too stressful.
Worst: Hubby home sick with the flu for THREE DAYS this week. MY LORD can that man WHINGE! Yes I understand his nose is snotty, but BLOW IT DONT SNIFF IT. Yes, I understand his throat is itchy, BUT DONT MAKE PHLEGM SNORKING NOISES NEAR MY HEAD. It is very much like having a 3rd child to look after! And heaven forbid he takes anything to help, no no no much better to suffer and sook and complain about it than take a tablet or some vitamins and clear it up!
mmm….not very sympathetic?
OMM: my MIL’s financial separation from her soon-to-be ex husband (my soon to be ex FIL) is going to pre-trial hearing at the end of the month, after nearly 2 years of separation. I hope things can proceed to trial, and a speedy trial date, because financially things are pretty dire. My hubby and I are paying over $6000 a month for her mortgages as she is unable to pay them herself, and it is taking its toll on our savings. Would be wonderful to see the soon-to-be ex FIL get shot down in flames for being such a pig headed arse, but the justice system so far is not helping. It seems the fact that he is representing himself is allowing him to get away with all kinds of things which would not be allowed if he was represented by a lawyer.
loading...
Ive already posted under my name today but anon for this one
Best: I can jog 2.5k. Whoo! Not much of a feat for some but a huge achievement for me.
Worst: my friend text me to say it was his nephews funeral this week – he died 3 days before he was born (I dont know all the details, I’m sure he’ll tell me when hes ready) My heart aches deeply for his sister and her husband. But i feel desperately sad for my friend as he’s only 20 and was excited to have a little mate to kick around with and also for the anguish he’s feeling at not being able to ease his sisters pain. There doesnt seem to be much support for the extended family of stillborn children.
loading...
Best: The Dr Who shows with the MSO went really well last weekend! Hopefully the BBC makes a dvd, or they show it on the ABC, as I want to see what it looked and sounded like for the audience! Here’s one of the daleks that was hanging out backstage.
No real worsts this week, just plodding along really!
loading...
Best: I got my dream job offer!! I am really really lucky (and even a bit surprised) i got the job because i thought i tanked the interview. But yay i start next week!
Worst: Today is my last day at my old workplace and I’m feeling a bit sad.
So nice to hear everyone’s good news xo
loading...
Congrats! Nothing like awesome new job news to perk the day
loading...
BEST: I’ve been job hunting since November and I got a call for one this Monday, had the interview yesterday and got the job today!
WORST: During the interview I told the my now wonderful boss that I am available for the days she wanted me. But I’m not 100% sure if I am because my timetable hasn’t been released.
What do I say to her if I’m not available for some of the time she wants me? Any advice? I’m sure someone must have been there.
loading...
Disclaimer: At my current job I was constantly verbally harassed by one of the managers (she’s on leave now) and while she was reported to HR nothing has been done about it. There’s no way I would have been able to quit without another job. So when she asked me about my availabilities I think the desperation to leave my current job took over. I’ll feel terrible and I’ll feel even more guilty if my timetable doesn’t work out.
loading...
i would probably just say that some of your classes have had a last minute change of timetable that you can’t avoid. If they really want you, they will understand. Besides, I’m not sure what sort of role you’ve gotten (congrats by the way!) but if your job doesn’t really directly affect anyone else, then it shouldn’t matter what days you can work.
loading...
Best: finding out at me 12 week scan that I have a perfect baby growing inside of me and I’m low risk for complications
Worst: the pain my little boy is in from a see-saw accident. He put his teeth through his lip and bend his front 2 teeth back 15 degrees. He might loose his front teeth and have damaged his adult teeth. Poor thing
loading...
My daughter pushed her front tooth right back up to her gum. It made it’s way back down and doesn’t seem to be damaged, just a bit crooked. Fingers crossed your boy has the same luck.
loading...
Ooh I know all about tooth incidents as a 4 yr old with a broken arm I was running with a recorder in my mouth tripped and pushed one of my front teeth into my palette.. I had surgery to find this missing tooth but it was never found.. I was also told I’d have damaged my adult teeth but they were perfect
don’t stress I’m sure he will be the same
loading...
I knocked my 2 front baby teeth out in a trampolining accident at 5. My adult teeth were kind of pushed through as I hit my gums pretty hard. Although they were not as long as most other peoples 2 front teeth are (same size as the ones next to) and a little bumpy due to immaturity they are completely fine. I had them filed down to give a more even appearance in my early 20′s and my teeth look completely normal. if any thing I get compliments on them. So try not to worry too much, I know easier said than done.
loading...
One of my girls had a swing accident and one of her front teeth went grey when it stabilized. We had to g it extracted as her adult tooth grew in front of it at 7. Sometimes damaged baby teeth don’t come out by themselves, so keep an eye out for that.
loading...
My brother, sister and I were playing on the clothes line, hanging on it and swinging each other around and around. Until it was my sister’s go and she flew off and her mouth went into the path. She was down a front tooth until her adult one came through. I remember having to go to the emergency night dentist for that little effort. We weren’t popular.
loading...
Best – I found out this morning that we are pregnant! It will be my fourth pregnancy but third baby. Am feeling very happy & excited….ohh of course anxious…….and nervous after a miscarrige I just want everything to be ok….
Will announce with my usual post name in about 12 weeks!!!
Worst: None!!
loading...
Best:
Avoided a huge legal showdown last night. My boss was off sick and I suggested to my colleague that we should put a certain court story online (I work in a newsroom). Big mistake. Had a visit from chief of staff telling us to rip it down, and then a call from legal asking how it made its way online as they explicity asked news not to upload it at 10am that morning. This was 6pm at night.
I simply said we weren’t told, as we weren’t! My department is the most underrated and underappreciated in the scheme of things. We aren’t told little things, that could turn into big, expensive legal things!
My boss was very appreciative that I called and told him what happened and I in no way was to blame. THANK GOD.
Best 2:
There is no man power to put a current producer in the role, so I will work Tues-Sat, which suits me fine. I have to be quick smart before people lose interest, but I have got a rough script going and I am quite excited!
A segment we used to air on the weekend got axed, but my boss being the online king wants to keep it going for the website. Which means I am going to produce it.
Worst:
Could be missing out on my brothers newly announced wedding: it is in Thailand. I have been making all these plans to buy a home with my boyfriend, so it looks unaffordable.
And a big shout out to Bec, your baby is lovely.
loading...
Why not just put the house purchase back a bit and go to Thailand? It’s your brother, after all. Thailand’s not *that* expensive to go to.
loading...
Best: I had a nice haircut and am loving the change.
Best 2: I attended a casting today for an ad and I so hope I get chosen. It was my first casting but I didn’t have time to be nervous and the brand manager was really nice. Fingers crossed!
Worst: I was at work on Sunday night and a lady felt unwell and I called an ambulance. A lot of people were walking past and pointing and being quite intrusive when the ambos (who were wonderful) were doing their work. I just find it quite rude and there was no compassion for the lady who was ill.
loading...
TGIF!!!! its been a busy week at work!! but now to best and worst!:
Best: its friday and im going to see Cat Empire and Tijuana Cartel in freo tonight (bday present from my aunty) and staying over at her house as well so im having a little getaway weekend away from the hubby il miss him since we are still newlyweds however will nice to spend time with my family
plan is just to dance and dance tonight and then have a lazy morning breakfast and go to the markets and return home later saturay evening.
Started yoga this week and forgotten how good it makes me feel and will be going twice a week starting next week its a nice change of pace too from just working and coming home each night .
Other best is all my gfs are so happy in love atm and it makes me so happy so see them fulfilled in life and love.
No worsts! have a great weekend all!
loading...
Best: I made lor bak from SBS Feast mag and blogged it during the week (it’s really delicious, btw), and the editor of Feast retweeted it. I know that’s not much to everyone else, but for a food blogger, it’s like having your rock star hero tell you they’re liking your tunes. I. Die.
Worst: I’m off to a funeral today, to say goodbye to my cousin who died at the age of 23 after being diagnosed with throat cancer 2 weeks ago.
OMM: Hoping you all have lovely weekends
loading...
PerthBri, I’m sorry to hear about your cousin. That’s just terrible news.
Would you mind telling me your blog address? I love looking at local foodie blogs and I’m always keen to try new recipes.
loading...
Thank you, Bunny. We’re just happy he’s in a better place now.
I’m at eatmeetswest.wordpress.com – I love new visitors, let me know what you think
loading...
Is wordpress better than blogspot? I have been using blogger but am looking to move the blog over to wordpress.
loading...
I haven’t tried blogspot, but WordPress is really user friendly, especially since I’m a noob.
loading...
Best 1#: Bought a wonderful second hand car on Monday. So nice to have my own wheels again after not having a car since June last year!
Best 2#: Going to Brisbane for a wedding next week, where my BF is groomsman! Cant wait to see him in a suite/tux/dressed up. He actually doesn’t know what he is wearing yet….
Best 3#: A wonderful Canadian friend of mine I made on Contiki in 2007 now lives in Brisbane and I CANNOT wait to see her again!
Worst: The owner of the home we bought, hasn’t actually released the titles to the property yet, so we cant get our loan!
Depending when it goes through it may be after the 21 days of finance settlement, then it gets messy! Even though it wont be our fault, I just want it sorted and over and done with!
OMM: The fight I had with my best friend earlier this week, and the things she told me when we were trying to work it out.
I feel a little confused and sad at the circumstances, and it may be awhile before I think I can feel normal about our friendship again.
loading...
Best: Exercise! Started the C25K last week and doing really well so far! And really enjoying riding to work each day.
Worst/OMM: I’m terribly bored with my unskilled job and have hatched a plan to go to uni next year to try to become a radiographer. It is the first thing that I’ve looked into studying that really interests and excites me, which is my mood about it nearly all the time. After working this useless robot job for a couple of years, I really have a strong feeling of wanting to help people, get a real skill and play a part in making people’s lives better.
Now it goes on a bit of a tangent, sorry:
But, I was out to dinner and we were seated next to some girls, who I guessed were graduates of some sort of medical field, talking about getting jobs. They were saying how it didn’t matter what qualification you had, it was personality that mattered when it came to being hired. Which makes me worry a little, considering I have what most people consider a ‘shy’ personality. Am I going to lead myself down a dead end if no one likes me enough to give me a job anyway?
Mostly my problem is endless self-doubt. I think I’m incapable of believing I can do anything. :-/
loading...
I was looking at a site yesterday about skills shortages, and I think radiographer may have been on it. So don’t worry too much!
If you’re good, it’ll show. And shy people often open up when talking about something they like, so you may find your personality shines in interviews anyway. Go for it, I say. xx
loading...
Where is this site!? I read something awhile ago about how there is in the next 5 or so years, a predicted huge gap and shortage in librarians because the average aged demographic currently, for librarians, is nearly retirement age!
I was like “I’m so there, except I’m fairly noisy, is that a problem?!”.
loading...
http://www.deewr.gov.au/Employment/LMI/SkillShortages/Pages/Overview.aspx
I would love to be a librarian. Although I think you have to go to uni for years to do it!
loading...
Its a standard degree in infor tech/management or you can do it as a postgraduate degree even if it’s an unrelated field. I did part of it, but dropped out because I ended up being just too busy. I found out heaps about Internet searches etc.
loading...
A friend of mine is a radiographer – you’re in good company!
She was one of 7 people in her graduating class, they had 37 job offers available.
Good luck studying, it’s a great calling to go into medicine!
loading...
Sorry to be a downer but my friend just finished her radiographer degree and she cannot find a job anywhere in Australia to do her intern year, and she went to a really good uni and got a Distinction average. Apparently it is the worst year for job offers in 6 years. Just something to keep in mind as I’d hate for that to happen to you
loading...
What kind of dumbarse tells people that qualifications don’t matter?
I think it’s true that if you’re applying for a job where you need to communicate with the general public you need good communication/people skills, but that’s not the same as personality. You need the qualification, technical skills AND people skills. I have a radiographer friend and he’s just gorgeous. I know he would be lovely with his patients.
Get studying. You sound motivated and caring. You will be just fine. No, you won’t be fine. You’ll be fabulous!
loading...
I think it says more about their personalities and expectations if that is what they were saying. Mum works for a radiology practice, the rads have a great job! I tried to convince her to study to be one, but she’s “too old”. I thought she’d be great at it.
loading...
Best: Bec’s beautiful baby boy. So happy for her and her family.
Best: Finally being able to move! I did my first pilates class in nearly a year and a half on Monday and today, I walked 10 kms! It feels so good! It is a long way off from where I was but its a super good start! I just can’t overdo it before my trip!
I am looking forward to next week. I am going to do lots of cooking! I am going to make mini lemon meringue pies, choc chip cookies, hedgehog slice and mum choice of dessert for her birthday.
Have a lovely weekend all! xx
loading...
Best: Can’t go past beautiful Bec Sparrow’s beautiful baby Fin. It’s been all smiles in the MM office this week. So happy for Bec, Brad and Ava, he’s gorgeous.
Worst: none. I just wrote a few and then deleted them. Everything else seems insignificant
loading...
Best: Back to school this week, back right into the swimming, cricket, bus run and routine stuff. The boys are really looking forward to their swimming carnival, and I am too. They have been going to training all summer and have come a long way. They are really happy with their teachers and I could not be more happy with the school for making it a happy place.
Worst: Floods again. We aren’t too badly affected this time so that is a blessing. We are used to the river flooding out now all over our paddocks and thank god it isn’t a fast moving destructive one. The worst bit would be that we have decided not to put in as much crop this year due to the lack of good harvests with rain and floods. Not worth our time and money putting it in now. Hopefully the arse doesn’t fall out of the cattle market, or we are in trouble. I am feeling for those west of us who are airlifting sheep and have lost a hell of a lot of crops too. Isolation for weeks is tough. More rain coming too! We might get another big one (flood) in that case.
Floods are better than droughts though!
OMM: unpacking (still), procrastinating, Mozzies and sandflies that threaten to carry us away. Michelle Bridges WBT – I am scared as a rabbit about how I will do this as well.
Bec: I am so excited that you have had your beautiful baby boy. He is such a snuffy papoose! I know what it is like to be a family member holding their breath until baby after a loss is born, and I am sighing a breath of relief that all is good in the world now. xx
loading...
Also I forgot to put in there that toilet training is the pits. If I could outsource one job within the realms of raising children, this would be it!
Really traumatic for everyone involved.
loading...
Worst: Starting to get incredibly frustrated living at home. My step father charges me enough board to rent a small house, and I struggle to pay it on my student wages, when I asked about a reduction in the board, because I have other expenses to meet, I got asked “what am I? a charity?”. I was devastated, I feel like i’m spiralling deeper into a circle of debt, and he doesn’t care. Mind you, my 18 year old step brother won’t get a job, and continues to live in the exact same life scenario (study) and has been told he doesn’t need to pay board. Am I missing something in this?
Best: My gorgeus puppy and the joy she brings me.
loading...
Surely you can find somewhere cheaper to move out to, then, ladysarah? This sounds like a very bad situation for you, and your mental health is worth a lot. Your stepfather’s double standards are poor and clearly they won’t improve any time soon.
Wishing you well, let us know if we can help. xx
loading...
It might be better to move out; a room in a sharehouse may not cost much more than your board. Do do your research before moving out though, bills can be sky high and it is a big committment. Ask friends who live out of home for an estimate of what you might spend.
If you move out you may also be able to get Centrelink payments including rent assistance. See the Student Services or Representative Union, or a student counsellor, at your educational instituation for advice.
Good luck dear!
loading...
Where is your mum in all this? Talk to her
loading...
She may not have a mother anymore. Just a thought.
Ladysarah, I know what it’s like to be on the receiving end of unfair treatment with step siblings. I could write a book on it, actually.
Ellie’s advice is spot on.
Good luck. Remember that one day this will all be in the past.
loading...
Best – The other night Miss 3 was walking round the block with DF and I, she grabbed our hands and kissed us both and said “Aww, we best friends!!” it totally melted my heart!
Other best – kicking morning sickness’s butt with those wafer things – soooo glad something has stopped the vomitting (even if I am still feeling queasy)!
Worst – watching my Mum look frailer and sicker every time I see her, and also feeling guilty for not being able to pluck a baby sitter out of thin air so DF and I can go out just the two of us for a few hours.
OMM – Sounds dumb but how do you decide who to invite to your wedding? We’re having a smallish one, so far it’s about 70 people but as I was addressing the invites it occured to me that a lot of the people invited are relatives we rarely see and people you more have to invite, or can’t not invite… How does someone ‘qualify’ for a wedding invite? We have friends coming too of course but I’m wondering if it’s weird to invite the likes of church friends who we’ve only known for a maximum of 12 months? There are some lovely families & couples we’re getting to know, and I’ve gotten to know moreso than my fiance, as we do playdates and stuff during the week etc, but I kind of feel weird inviting people we haven’t know for years… but then I think it’s a nice gesture to invite people. A friend of mine suggested we try and invite people who (as much as you can predict) WILL be in our lives, moreso than people who HAVE been in our lives, if that makes sense…. our big day is creeping up (I’ve posted about 80% of the invites this week) but it’s not too late to invite a few more people & we have room to with numbers and the venue etc…. I’d love opinions on the matter and how other people decided who gets an invite or not!!
loading...
Maybe think about who is going to still be around (ie still friends or relatives that are actually involved) in 10 years?
So you are not looking back at your album thinking who are they again?
And because those people who are with you for the long haul matter.
Have a lovely wedding!
loading...
Only invite people you want to have there!
loading...
We had 46 guests at our wedding.
The rule was: Invite the people we can’t imagine getting married without
loading...
Worst: My mum is dying. Has a doctor’s appointment today for more symptoms that I know are just going to get worse. It’s a strange limbo to be in knowing and waiting. I am numb.
Worst: Having the most horrendous prolonged PMS this week. Cranky, anxious, edgy… Sucks.
Best: Loving all the lovely comments for Bec Sparrow and hew new boy. Also very happy for her.
Best: Loving reading everyone’s comments. It is cheering me up no end.
loading...
As someone who has experienced the Mum thing – if you need someone to talk to, let me know!
loading...
Thanks Monique. Will keep that in mind. It’s so strange.
loading...
It really is. I remember when it happened to me. It’s very strange knowing that she will die and just waiting for it to happen. It somehow doesn’t feel natural. Enjoy the time you have left with your Mum, no matter how sad it is, and try and think of any questions you haven’t asked her but always wanted to. Being only 13 when mine passed, there is so much I wish I had known but hadn’t thought to ask, and it’s a big regret of mine!
loading...
Thinking of you. It must be so hard
loading...
I am so very sorry to hear that Me. I lost my mum nearly ten years ago, it was the hardest thing I have ever been through. I miss her every day. Like others have said, spend as much as you can with her, and ask as many questions as you can. I didn’t have kids when my mum passed, but now I have there are heaps of things I would love to know about her as a child and her childhood, as well as myslef as a child. I wish you lots of tender moments with your mum for as long as possible xx .
loading...
worst: still not sure what will happen with my marriage, but trying to stay positive. Not ready to give up, and somehow I don’t think my husband is either, so we’ll try and work out what is going on and what we can do. I just want my husband to be happy to be with me (and vice versa) and enjoy being my partner. I deserve to be with someone who really loves being with me. He is a great dad and a nice guy overall, so I hope it works out. I can’t stop thinking about it though, and feel like I’m just floating around..
best: some sunshine this week
OMM: I’ve got a treadmill and some light weights at home. I use them regularly. I’d like to get some heavier weights and maybe a fit ball. I’m just wondering if anyone has any suggestions on the most useful/versatile things to get for home exercise. Also, are the things sold in Big W as effective as those in Workout World or Rebel Sport? I’m hoping to have a few things at home that would allow me to workout reasonably well (i don’t want any more large pieces of equipment, just accessories like a fit ball etc). Thanks..
loading...
Hi Bird – have been wondering how you have been going this week. The first step in all of this working out for you is both of you wanting it. Take one day at a time.
loading...
I wouldn’t go overboard on equipment, you can exercise all muscle groups with a fit ball, mat and some dumbells or strap on weights, especially of you have a DVD/book/app for guidance.
Best of luck for the ongoing relationship issues.
loading...
Oh, and my stuff was from big w
loading...
I was planning on getting a fit ball and some heavier weights..so I’m glad I’m on the right track!
loading...
Hey Bird, have been thinking of you and wondering what’s happening. Did you start councelling? Either both of you or just you on your own?
loading...
My husband has had one session with a counselor and he said he felt better talking to someone. He has another one this week. I have told him that I feel like I’m just stuck in this strange place at the moment – feel like I’ve been dumped, but still hoping, but scared to hope too much. I have asked him to talk to the counselor about couples counseling but I also think it’s important for him to talk to someone first as he’s kept a lot of things bottled up. It makes me sad that he initially felt that the only solution was to call it quits. I sometimes wonder about difficult situations that may come up in the future and how easily he may give up on us then. I’m going to see my GP and talk to her about what I could do to help myself. Thanks for asking
loading...
Worst/OMM: had a few really large meltdowns this week. Was so scared for awhile there that I might have PND. My baby is 8 months – is that what it’s called now? No idea. I’ve been so struggling to get my Dad out of my head and forget that he was an abusive ass but having a baby seems to have magnified the fact that I can’t get over what he’s done. People say you need to forgive people to move on and I just can’t forgive what he’s done. He’s screwed me up in so many ways and has made so many things harder for me and I hate him for that. Though this week I actually admitted I hate him rather than pretending that I didn’t which was oddly calming and therapeutic. Have been so worried that I will hit our daughter. I am against smacking, can’t ever imagine myself doing it but the worry is still there. I am my father’s daughter after all. Keep on having vivid flashbacks to the abuse and have been remembering things that I’d mentally blocked.
Best: my Husband, despite our issues, is such an adorable man. Sometimes I feel so bad that he has to put up with someone like me but he doesn’t mind and never complains. He held me until I stopped crying, worked from home twice this week to give me some time to cool off, took me out for lunch, etc. Feel much better.
Also, even more madly in love with my daughter. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Even writing this makes me want to cry. I miss her when she’s napping.
Another best: so happy for Bec. Had a little happy cry when I heard the news. She looks so happy and just beautiful.
loading...
Having a baby brings up so much stuff so don’t be surprised that you are going through all this stuff B’s Mummy. You are so lucky to be in love with your daughter and also to have a supportive husband. That’s the great thing about building your own life – you get to make right the mistakes of the past. It will all be OK. Be kind to yourself and give yourself time to heal. Meanwhile enjoy all that love from your bub and your hubby.
loading...
Thank you for your words – they help a lot.
loading...
Similar stuff happened to me when I had my kids, having had uncaring abusive parents, there is no answer to it, just go one day at a time and remember we are not our parents.
I don’t forgive, either, I don’t think it is possible and it belittles what happened to us. Our parents were adults and chose to treat us the way they did.
I was lucky that my parents chose care as little about my kids as they did about me so I did not have to play happy families.
I know you will do well and your fears will abate as your daughter grows. It is a bit harder for us but not impossible.
loading...
Thank you, that’s nice to hear. My dad is no longer in my life so no stress there, though, I do worry that my daughter will hate that she didn’t have a grandfather {my Husband’s dad is so scarily similar to my dad and is no longer in the picture too}. Any advice on how to deal with that {if it comes up}?
loading...
There is a kid’s book by Todd Parr called ‘The Family Book’ that talks about all the different kinds of families, big, small, one parent, step etc. it might be a starting point, then talk about how not everyone has grandparents, sometimes because they have died, sometimes they live too far away, sometimes because they are just not in contact any more because they don’t get along?
I’m not an expert, but we have a complex family situation with step-parents, my father being deceased etc, so I have thought about how I will explain it to my little girl in the future.
By the time she is old enough to ask, she will probably be old enough to understand some of the concepts.
loading...
Thanks for the name of that book, I might look it up.
I can totally relate to whaty you are saying. My parents appeared to be loving and caring to the outside world, but behind closed doors they were disconnected, uncaring and disinterested. They are following the exact same pattern with their grandchildren. Additionally, my mother was verbally and emotionally abusive regularly, sometimes even inflicting bruising too. My dad was so distant that he didn’t ever notice. After the birth of my first child I found myself screaming self-abuse into the mirror and pulled up short when I realised that I was hurling my mothers words at myself. It was a moment of reckoning and soon after I was diagnosed with PND. My point is that the demons of my past were laid bare when I became a mum. It was totally unexpected and horrifically shocking to go through, but I guess that it was all a part of defing myself as a mum. All I can do is encourage others to seek professional help for the sake of yourself and your children. Childhood and motherhood is frought and fragile so do what you can to protect, nurture and embrace.
loading...
My son doesn’t have any grandparents – they all dropped off the twig at the rate of one a year over four years, my son was six when the last one went. I don’t have any older rellies apart from my brothers and my husbands elderly aunts and uncles live a fair distance so we make a point of seeing older friends and making them a part of his life. My son loves stories about ‘the olden days’ etc and enjoys their company. Not the same as his own grandparents but it has worked for us.
loading...
Its still PND in the first year. If youre worried about it, you can go to your GP and get a referral to a psychologist for some subsidized sessions, or your local child health centre can help you out.
loading...
Hi there you have a lot to deal with. You only forgive someone for the peace that it gives you. Obviously it’s very tough ask considering what he put you through. But you have to start feeling better, you deserve that. You can’t let what he did to you affect you and your family your entire life. You deserve so much better. Forgiveness makes you feel so much better but it takes work. Hopefully you have read Louise Hay’s books, they do make such a difference. I used to worry for years that I’d inherited my father’s personality, it used to scare me. But I haven’t and nor will you. You’re a completely different person. So great abt your baby girl, I am very jealous. xxx
loading...
Only a worst this week . Have been working really hard (50 + hours including lots of 10 – Midnight conference Calls ) Because I work from home hubby expects me to do all the cookking , food shopping , laundry etc . Kids had no clean tops for school this morning . Apparently this was my fault . And even more annoying he works 4 days a week . His day off is never spent doing housework . I spent all Sunday cooking as well . feeling a tad overwhemled . I can’t do it all !!!!!!!!!
loading...
Your partner might need to read this article on working from home: http://www.helium.com/items/1185818-work-home-business-office-freelance-design-partner-living.
Let him know that this is not ok – boundaries only exist when we reinforce them. Good luck xx
loading...
Thanks !
loading...
That sucks, Over It. My ex was similar. He used to expect me to do the housework and cook as well as I started work at 5am and was home by 1.30pm. I was always tired because even after I would beg him to do the dishes for me after I made us dinner, he would refuse and make me do them at 10pm at night.
I’d say sit down and tell him how overwhelmed you feel and that just because you are at home while you work, it doesn’t mean you don’t have the added pressure of the office. Or the time to cook and clean.
loading...
Is there any way you can get a cleaner to come in to give you a hand at all? Perhaps, if you mention a cleaner hubby might get it then. Good luck!
It is hard, and no-one can do it all perfectly. Be gentle on yourself.