I never thought I'd have to explain rape to my 9-year-old. Nobody mentioned that in the baby books. But this parenting gig is full of constant surprises.
It was bedtime. My son Philip and I were tidying up his room and making his bed. His toy 'Kitty' fell on the floor. I commented that it was looking quite tattered these days.
"It looks so raped Mum."
Now I could have freaked out, but I didn't. For some reason, when faced with ultra-important parenting moments a calmness descends upon me. I knew in a nano second that this was a formative moment in his life.
Many thoughts raced through my head as I bent to retrieved 'raped Kitty' and finish tidying up Philip's bed.
"Where did he hear that word?"
"Does he know what it means?"
"Should I explain it to him or ignore it?"
"If I do explain it, what should I say?"
"Should I wait til morning so he doesn't have to think about it all night?"
I'd had the 'sex talk' with him over a year ago after friends at school started talking about it and I decided to lift the veil and remove the mystery. I told him exactly what sex was. The jokes he and his friends used to make in ignorance are no longer funny to him, thank goodness. The sex talk with kids needs to happen much earlier these days, I think. If you don't do it, their friends will and your explanation will be better.