Science has won everything again.
The latest in environmentally-friendly products has discovered one of the greatest renewable energies of all. Not wind. Not solar power.
Masturbation.
PornHub, an adult website with over 41 million viewers every day, are the brains behind the new toy.
“Every day, millions of hours of adult content are consumed online, wasting energy in the process and hurting the environment.” says a statement from the WankBand website. “At Pornhub we decided to do something about it. Introducing The Wankband: The first wearable tech that allows you to love the planet by loving yourself.’
Other wanking news: The best words for female-fapping.
Apparently, a little ball inside the watch mechanism creates and stores energy when it is moved up and down repeteadly. Sounds hot.
Don’t worry, ladies. It’s unisex. We’re not sure how, technique-wise. But only one way to find out.
Become a tester. The site is looking for some self-loving guinea pigs. Tempted? Or perhaps you have a partner or a teenage son who might be able to power the whole neighbourhood?
Here’s a video explaining the latest in wristie wristwear.
Who knew there were such geniuses working at PornHub?
Go forth, friends. Save the planet.
Top Comments
So, could you also wear whilst running, playing Wii etc?
I reckon 'Nintendo' might be the better choice of word in this context. I dare say that all the electrical energy used to deliver, er, 'footage' to the wearer would far outdo any gains from the bracelet.
haha