Do you need some thinking music?
By KATE HUNTER
Alright, we have a challenge for you. If there’s a man in your life, ask him the following questions:
1. “What’s my bra size?”
2. “What’s my dress size?”
3. “What’s my favourite perfume?”
4. “What’s my favourite clothes shop?”
5. “Where did I go to school?”
6. “Can you describe the day we met?”
7. “What’s my favourite film?”
8. “Do I suffer from any allergies?”
So how did that go? You may not even need to actually ask him those questions to have a fair idea of how he might respond – or be unable to respond. But wait. The man who knows all the answers is rare. He may even be extinct.
According to media reports:
Anything that involves dates causes major problems, with a third of the men surveyed confessing to being unable to remember the day they met their wife or girlfriend.
20 per cent of men had no idea what their partner’s best friend is called and the same number admitted that they didn’t know whether their significant other suffered from allergies.
Shoe size, middle name and favourite song or film also baffled the majority of male respondents.
It’s such a cheesy cliché isn’t it? … The bloke in the lingerie department, gesturing to the sales assistant the approximate size of his wife’s breasts…The chill on Christmas day because he bought you the perfume his mother wears.
Cheesy, yes. Cliche, most definitely. But also true? Has it been true in relationships you’ve been in or are in now?
What basic questions could the men in your life not be able to answer about you?
Comments
63 Comments so far
Late response, but this type of article has been bothering me slightly recently so I figured I’d try to articulate why.
Anyone who says your bra size is a reflection of your personality ought to be be slapped, so why should your boyfriend knowing your cup size have anything to do with how well he knows or loves you as a human?
It seems as though the media reports on which Kate Hunter bases this article are begging for more critical deconstruction than a few rhetorical questions: “it’s such a cheesy cliche isn’t it?” and a throw to the peanut gallery. I expect more from this intelligent forum than just regurgitating hack material from other forums with a raised eyebrow for a question-mark as to whether it’s appropriate.
I don’t think many of those questions are relevant to my identity – dress size and shoe size certainly are not.
Anyone who says your bra size is a reflection of your personality ought to be be slapped, so why should your boyfriend knowing your cup size have anything to do with how well he knows or loves you as a human?
It seems as though the ‘media reports’ on which Kate Hunter bases this article are begging for more critical deconstruction than a few rhetorical questions: “it’s such a cheesy cliche isn’t it?” and a throw to the peanut gallery. I expect more from this intelligent forum than just regurgitating hack material with a question-mark.
I don’t think many of those questions are relevant to my identity – dress size and shoe size certainly are not.
The question we should be asking in response to facile relationship quizzes like this is, ‘what questions should we be asking our partners that might actually indicate anything about the strength of their love and care for us?’ How about, “do you love me?”, “Can you hold the other end of this?” “Can you tell your mum I don’t need another scarf without offending her?”, “I know it’s three am, but a friend just died and I need to go for a long walk somewhere near water, could you please come?”, “Have I mentioned recently how much I love you?”
Those are the questions we should ask our men to find out what our relationships are made of.
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I don’t remember my own shoe size. How am I meant to remember my partner’s?
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Hey, all of those bagging the article, on a Sunday night its all I can deal with. We have had a chuckle laughing about my bra size, its fun. Not every MM article has to be thought a provoking political quandary. Sometimes its OK to be silly.
There is enough in this world to be serious about, chill out & ask the questions or make up your own.
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Good for you. Yes, it’s ok to be silly.
But do it at your expense.
Stop making men the target of your so called “fun”
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So I just asked these to my husband. All nearly correct…
What am I allergic to??? Codeine and fun apparently. :/
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Kate, I usually am inspired and entertained by your writing. But this article leaves me feeling ‘meh’. I know it was a poke at fun, but these really the most important questions for your husband to know. In a similar. Ain, what if we asked wives to answer these about their man:
Golf handicap?
Rugby league team of choice?
Favourite olympic sport?
Favourite deodorant?
Best live music gig?
Job title?
OP score or state equilalent?
Shoe size?
Drink of choice?
Fave game in a casino?
Elle or Cindy?
What was the last sport he bet on?
I could answer some, but not all of these about my husband….but really….who cares?
It’s all a bit of fluff, from both sides, and perhaps a good conversation starter….in fact my husband and I had put our 3 littlies to bed, and were sitting on the back deck enjoying a cool Brissie breeze and a cold Sparkling shiraz, and ended up discussing the answers for nearly an hour!
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I’m a little vexed by this article.
I’ve been married twice, the first time in 1986, and I can guarantee it’s both of my wives who couldn’t answer the equivalent questions about me. Both of them forgot anniversaries and my birthday more than once. Both would buy clothes for me that didn’t fit, and both wouldn’t have a clue what my favourite food was.
This male bashing for being “dumb” is really quite tedious and I’m wondering why women’s web communities, and particularly Mamamia, keep publishing this rubbish.
If the boot was on the other foot, where the subject was “tell us the dumb things your WAGS have done you’d all carry on like stepped on chooks.
I know you think it’s funny, but who is laughing?
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I’m sorry but although a bit humorous, I find articles like this slightly offensive, and liken it to the myriad of “male bashing” television and radio advertisements we encounter everyday.
The answer to most of the questions is ‘who cares”. I certainly don’t care that my partner doesn’t know my jocks size, my favourite deodorant or where I went to school. As long as I know these facts I’m happy and I would hope that she knows the answers to her questions as well.
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I agree, I couldn’t give a stuff if my partner doesn’t know my dress size, bra size etc. he knows that when I have a headache a neck massage generally helps, that I love his Thai curries, that a clean kitchen is great to come home to. These are the things that are important.
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Also to add to my previous comment, I think if you actually asked meaningful questions most men would get them right.
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My other half gets bonus points on just about every question, simply because he remembers my “favourite” things much longer than I do. It’s no wonder men are so confused when our favourites are usually just the flavour of the month.
Men have different priorities to women when it comes to relationships. They might not know your bra size, and let’s face it – who wants their partner choosing their bras? – but they focus on other things that are usually more beneficial than simply allowing him to buy you a lacy getup for Christmas. Oven broken? Ask him. Your car is making a funny sound? Ask him.
Whilst I know this article was meant to be semi-humorous, I can’t help but feel offended at the way the media portrays men as hopeless, bumbling fools when it comes to anything about their wives.
I literally just got off the phone to my father, who was wandering aimlessly around the shopping centre trying to find the “perfect” gift for my mum. After 30 years, I’m guessing he’s finding it hard to top last year every Christmas. Personally, I think he’s brilliant just because he tries, even if he doesn’t always get it right.
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My boyfriend got every answer right! On the other hand, I could only answer a few for him, FAIL!
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After 21 years, the only one my other half got right was the allergies. Oh we’ll, it is the one that old kill me.
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Twenty-one years together and the only one he could answer was the allergies. I guess that’s the important one really ……
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I can answer all of those in regards to my wife and I am not the only man I know who could do so.
There are a couple of things my wife couldn’t answer about me.
This constant crap asserting that all men are idiots is getting very boring. It’s not the 1950′s, most of us have actually attended the births of our children, filled in forms for our wives without having to ask their date of birth, mothers’ maiden names etc and have no issues with buying clothes and lingerie for them. Christ, we even know how to cook, can remember the middle names of our children, know our kids specific illnesses and the medication they need and have been known to pick our kids up from school.
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Agreed. While the article is meant to be funny (and is to a degree) I’m not sure how funny I’d find it if I were male. My husband knows most of this stuff too James & the ones he doesn’t I don’t know either, eg. How do I possibly choose just one clothes shop to love best?
Good on you for being one of the modern males who knows stuff & takes equal responsibility for the ones you love.
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The first thing I thought when reading through this too was … “I’m quite happy with my bf not knowing my sizes!”
I know that if he was going to buy me an article of clothing and needed to know my size he would probably go look it up and check on my other clothes. (he has done this before to buy me shoes!) But even that isn’t a real indicator these days. What with vanity sizing, I don’t even know my real dress size!
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*stands and applauds*
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I agree; there is also a high proportion of advertising that seems to ridicule men these days and portray them as idiots. Why is this?
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Haha, true that. My husband may or may not have once given the wrong date of my birthday to the bank or so. So when they called me and asked for confirmation it was quite awkward when I had to correct them…
But other than that he does actually amaze me of how many details he knows at times, then again I don’t really put a lot of meaning into those details.
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I don’t even know half of those answers!!!! lol lol
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My partner is pretty good at remembering things I like except he always forgets what the date of my birthday is. He knows it’s at the end of August but gets confused. It’s actually pretty funny watching him trying to remember.
He knows my favourite perfume because it’s the first present he ever bought me. Tommy Girl. He knows that if I wear it he is going to get lucky.
He wouldn’t know my bra size. In fact I don’t think he knows what bra sizes are! There is small, medium and large only!
He has no idea about clothes shops. He would probably say “Target or Kmart!”
Everything else he would know and he can describe the day we met better than I can. It’s been 8 years but he still knows exactly what I wore, where we went and what we did right down to the smallest detail.
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Ah, I am 100% sure my boyfriend would answer all of these correctly. I think I’m a little too easy to read… Or he’s just excellent, haha!
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Recent studies have shown that most women are wearing the wrong size/ill fitting bra so how can the man in their life know when they don’t?
This is just another example of stereotyping. Many if the comments reveal men know more than given credit for. In our house it would be me who would know the answers to such questions moe than my wife. She’s terrible with birthdays (incluuding her own) & anniversaries.
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oh this is a fun post…just came back from reading that story about loosing a child
I think my guy scores pretty high here (he probably wouldn’t score very high at other things lol) He knows:
my shoe size
my dress size
my birthday
my favourite perfume (it has been discontinued and he managed to get me 2 bottles of it for my bday)
he can describe the day we met 7 or 8 years ago now
my favourite clothes shop (ebay)
fail on my bra size i think… but then it has shrunken since I stopped breastfeeding and I don’t even bother to wear bras anymore (my boobs are enjoying their new found freedom lol)
School he could probably tell me where I went in Australia but I was in France until 16 yo so he wouldn’t have a clue there.
Yes for allergies (i have none- easy one)
I don’t have a favourite movie – probably a few that he wouldn’t be able to pick
Natural hair colour: I don’t even know what it is- I think I started colouring it around 15 yo and have been all shades since but my own.
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We havent been going out long enough for him to know all the answers (like my size!), but he’d be fine with where/when we met, my birthday (we’re the same month), and my natural hair colour (I don’t dye it!). Possibly what school I went to, but thats about it. Like most girls, I could probably know a lot more about him than he does about me!
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I knew some of them.I just call her my supermodel
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For Kate’s questions:
Bra size — spot on. He’s spent so much time studying their contents, I’m not surprised he got it right!
Dress size — “Which dress?” Fair call. Bloody clothes sizing!
Favourite perfume — “That stuff in the blue and red box I put you onto.” I’d have to give that a pass, as he did get it right, even without remembering the name.
Clothes shop — “Is there one which isn’t your favorite?” Harsh, but probably true.
School — “Where didn’t you go to school?” We moved that often I can’t even remember them all.
Day we met — Fail.
Favourite film — “Depends on what time of month it is.” This earned him a whack on the head, but is probably true (not that I’d admit it to him).
Allergies — “None that we know of.” Spot on.
For the quoted questions:
Mobile number — Yep. I had to check.
Underwear — same as bra.
D.O.B. — No problem.
Natural hair color — I’ve never colored my hair, so that was pretty easy.
Job title — Mummy. Agreed. And loving it.
One wrong, a couple of close enoughs, and some harsh truths thrown in. That’s my man!
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Re movie: “what time of month is it?” HA!! depending on hormones it jumps between High Society & Apocalypse Now!!!!!!
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“I love the smell of Napalm at school pick up time. Smells like…..victory.”
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My husband got them all right, except for the dress size, but that’s changed a bit recently. Luckily he thought I was smaller not bigger than I am.
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Well I found even I don’t know some of those things about myself. Most of those aren’t important details in my life. Husband has successfully bought my dream shoes without asking my size, He knows my date of birth, telephone number and our anniversaries. He knows what styles and colours I wear and he knows the things I enjoy doing and what I find interesting.
My job title is housewife, but he thinks it’s “beloved wife” and that’s close enough, right?
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Hubby got them all correct of course. May have to start trying to be more mysterious so I have a secret or two. And thanks Kate, he’s strutting about the house now very pleased with himself.
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LOVE, LOVE LOVE that 11% of men don’t know their partner’s natural hair colour!
My husband knows mine….pink! Lol
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The only one that I couldn’t answer was what is my wife’s bra size.
I know what size tops and skirts and so forth that she wears, because I’ve asked her. Often I’ll surprise her with a gift of a top or a skirt that I’ve seen as I’ve gone past a dress shop. I have a fairly good idea of what she’ll like or dislike, any it is very rare that any item of clothing that I’ve bought for her is returned.
I’d never try and buy her a bra.
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Years ago when our son was about 4 my partner (who at that point had been my de-facto for 5 years) and I were talking about middle names and I found out that he didn’t know what mine was.
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I got 6.5 for her. Getting married in a month, I feel secure
Can anyone give a good URL for a man-quiz i can make her do?
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Boyfriend got all the questions right! Although he doesn’t know my mobile number after 4.5 years…
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All of these things relate to fashion and beauty as if that is the most important thing to know about someone. These things are much more important generally to women. Ask women who their husbands favourite player is in the footy, or his favourite V8 Supercar driver is, his dream car or how much he can bench press at the gym and see how you get on.
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Footy player no idea, Lowndes, Porche 911, doesn’t go to they gym. Teams – ‘pies, parra, brumbies, arsenal, 49ers, Holden, Ferrarri, Schumacher (causing some tension now that he isn’t Ferrari), Coopers Pale Ale, smoky whisky, absolute vodka frozen straight up.
Given my size changes between shops and I have no perfume preferences the first four questions are irrelevant. I wouldn’t expect him to buy me clothes any more than I buy his.
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Lets see. My husband doesn’t have a particular favourite footy player, he just generally loves collingwood. He’s not much into v8 super cars, but loves motorcycle grand pix. Can’t quite remember the guy’s name, but he’s an Aussie. Doesn’t bench press, but walks a lot. Can’t run because football ruined his knees and rides his pushy.
His dream car is an old Holden monaro, ford gto, or Chrysler Charger.
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Faybian,
Ford didn’t make a GTO…
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lol, think an “H” was lost there. Point proved.
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Mine knows all the answers… I had to check the tag on my bra to see if he was right.
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Umm sorry but I think it’s abit silly… My partner knows the answer to all these questions and probably a lot more. I would expect a lot of women’s partners would be the same, they are fairly basic questions IMO. He actually has an awesome memory unlike me lol
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Fun as always, Kate – I usually get a good giggle from your pieces. But then I got to thinking … Not sure I could answer similar questions about the man in my life!
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I can’t answer three of those questions about myself- so I could hardly expect him to!
(PS The title says 7 questions- but isn’t that 8?)
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Thanks Kylie! As you know, maths has never been my strength .. *fixed* and I don’t have answers to some of those questions, but depending on my mood, I’d like J to know
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Fun, as always, Kate – I really enjoy your pieces.
But then I got to thinking. Could I answer similar questions about the man in my life? Hmmm … there’s a reason I never buy his clothes for him.
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I tell you what, I will learn my wifes bra size when she learns how to change a car tyre, check tyre pressures and check the oil and other fluid levels. Fair deal?.
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Theres a lot of us can actually do these things. Maybe you could teach her while she’s teaching you things about herself.
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You’re comparing knowing info about your wife and who she is to maintaining a car? Major loss of brownie points
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no, I am comparing me knowing about her bra to her knowing about her car.
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Your wife doesn’t know how to do those things?
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no, I just made it up for the story, because every woman knows that stuff quite obviously. They just stand by the side of the road looking lost when they get a flat tyre to preserve their nails.
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You’re funny.
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I WISH that I was left alone to capably change my own tire after a blow out when I was just 19. But unfortunately, a lycra clad “hero” came to my “rescue” and ignored me when I told him I was fine, knew what I was doing and didn’t need help. He proceeded with snatching the tyre iron from my hand and taking over.
I was too gobsmacked to do anything but watch, all the while insisting I was fine and he could go. He was SO pleased with himself when he finally finished and I felt the only polite thing to do was to thank him. But the whole experience was uncomfortable and insulting.
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Those pesky helping type men, the world would do well to be rid of them huh. Evil do gooders, lets hope we can progress as a society to one in which people just pass you by when you are obviously having a bad day.
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I used to know how to do stuff like change a tyre, fix leaky taps etc. Embarrassed to say I’ve forgotten because at our place jobs are largely divided down old-fashioned gender lines. Not sure why. Mildly embarrassed about it, but it seems to work.
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It’s the same at my house. I’ve become embarrassingly dependent in these areas.
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I know the RAC’s phone number – and my husband got all those questions right about me!
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That’s one item for you to remember to her 4 plus new skills – so let’s balance it out, shall we?
We’ll learn the car stuff and you can learn the bra size plus a couple of the following:
- how to make the bed using hospital corners
- how to fold a fitted sheet
- the correct and most effective way to wash dishes (this includes wiping down benches and sink – always gets missed at my house…)
- how to scrub the toilet/bath/shower correctly
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Boy are you a control freak!
Do you run around and inspect the bed for correct hospital corners? What happens if they aren’t up to scratch? Chuck everything on the floor like my old instructor at recruit training?
What the hell are you doing scrubbing the bathroom for? Clean it chemically by spraying stuff everywhere then get the hose and wash it all away. Simple really, and doesn’t involve scrubbing anything.
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