Collette Dinnigan
Forty-six-year-old fashion designer Collette Dinnigan has announced she’s four and a half month’s pregnant. She’ll be 47 when she gives birth.
In an article that ran in The Daily Telegraph, Collette said she was thrilled to be pregnant (she conceived naturally) but noted her pregnancy should not necessarily be used as a benchmark for other women looking to get pregnant later in life.
“It’s no secret we wanted to (have a baby), we got married last year so we’re very happy it’s happened,” said Dinnigan, who married her 36-year-old partner Bradley last year and has a seven-year-old daughter with entertainment reporter Richard Wilkins.
“But it’s one of those things for women. I think you should never wait too late in life, but we consider ourselves really fortunate.
“I think people see so many Hollywood stars out there having babies in their 40s. It’s a message that I think women need to understand it’s very difficult to have a baby in your 40s.”
“You really need to start a lot earlier if you want to start a family and I think there are a lot so misconceptions that it’s easy to have a career and then start a family at forty.”
Some facts about fertility and how a woman’s age affects her chances of getting pregnant from yourfertility.org.au:
- Starting at about age 32, a woman’s chances of conceiving decrease gradually but significantly.
- From age 37, the decline in a woman’s ‘fertility potential’ speeds up.
- By age 40, fertility has fallen by half.
- More than 70 per cent of under-30s women conceive within three months. For women aged over 36, this drops to about 40 per cent.
- At age 25, only five per cent of women take more than a year to conceive. For women aged 35, this figure rises to 30 per cent.
Comments
180 Comments so far
I tried to have a baby from 39 to 42 with multiple ivf’s, didn’t work. I wish this lady happiness, and every other woman who wants to have a child, I hope your dream comes true. Donor egg, etc., who cares, it is her choice. Live and let live, and love to her and all those women who dream of being a mother.
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Cougar! She is older than our mums, and they are old!
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Great news..I had my last baby (3rd) at home in the water at 46 years of age….and am 50 in a couple of weeks and still breastfeeding..it does happen and is possible! Love to connect with Collette as an “older” mum and share x
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Gosh only yesterday I was asking my Gynae if I was too old for a 3rd child at the age of 36 lol! This puts it in perspective!
Anyway she said I wasn’t too old but it doesn’t matter now because after a frank discussion last night my husband and I decided against it. Raising children is bloody hard work, i’m tired as it is, I can’t imagine how tiring Colette will be but she will have heaps of help. If I could afford a night nurse for the first 6 weeks and a cleaner or housekeeper or nanny or something like that for the first 3 years, i’d probably have a 3rd.
But we can’t so we won’t. Congrats to Collette.
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Interesting debate about age.
My mum is 72 and looks after my threenager (LOVE that term) twice a week.
They play all day, go to the park and shops and generally have a ball. Mainly because of her state of mind. I don’t think it’s really occurred to her that she’s 70+! That and she can rest whenever she likes on her days off.
Moral of the story – keep your attitude fresh my friends. No judgement…
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All children deserve nothing less than a welcoming, peaceful world to arrive in to. Congratulations Collette!
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My grandmother had my mum when she was 46, a complete surprise after having her third child 10 years previously, and her father was 50 when she was born. From my mum’s experience, she hated having older parents. Sure they were loving and kind, but she said it was like being raised by grandparents instead. Her father died when she was 22, the same age i am now.
I know a lot of women meet their partners later on in life and then have a baby. However, my aunty married her partner (now my uncle) when they were 26. They decided they’d put off having a baby as they wanted to travel, have careers, live overseas etc and only when she turned 39 did they start trying. 5 years later and no baby, and i don’t think its ever going to happen. I guess they did exactly what Collette is telling women not to do lol
P.S Collette is when of my favourite girls names at the moment
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So many of these posts are personally offensive. I met my husband “late” at 36. Married at 39. We tried and tried. The losses, sadness and ultimately money spent on Ivf didn’t bring us the baby we wanted with all our hearts. So we decided to try via egg donation. We now have an 18 month old who we love and treasure more than words can describe. I had our little guy at 44 and in 7 days will hopefully be up the duff with number 2.
We are healthy, active, engaged parents with the best motivation in the world to stay this way. Do I wish I was a younger Parent? Yes. But that Is not what life dealt us. We are good parents. We love our child. We will do everything we can to remain healthy, active and young at heart. And don’t you dare pity us in the school yard because there is absolutely nothing to pity!
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I am 42, and have just started the roller coster of IVF… as Job expat said so elequently, that life does not always deals fairly!! I have always wanted to be a mother, just not with some half wit,,, so i had to wait until my prince charming arrived. Just failed my first cycle,, but want to keep on trying,,, and your comment Job expat, has given me hope,,So thank you.
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None of my or our business, sure, but if she’s putting it out there…..through my own IVF journey, i have discovered that overwhelmingly many women of that age who have children actually do via egg donation. If that works for you, fine, but lets not kid ourselves, it is a serious minority that can have kids, naturally, at her age. To continue peddling this is doing a disservice to women.
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That’s exactly what Collette is saying “noted her pregnancy should not necessarily be used as a benchmark for other women looking to get pregnant later in life.”
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Yes she did state that which I thought was a really good thing that she did. I admire here for making that statement.
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Two naturally conceived healthy and beautiful babies born to me at 39 and 44. It does happen. Maybe we won the baby lottery, I would have loved to have started earlier but we didn’t meet till I was older. All I can say, is don’t judge – and don’t give up – and as our gorgeous little munchkins wreak chaos, love and mayhem in our lives…luckily it happened for us. We are forever grateful for our little ones.
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We want our fertility to change with our lifestyle. Of course we can feel young at 30, 40, 50 but doesn’t mean our insides agree.
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Congratulations to Collette Dinnigan and all the other over-40 commenters who have uneventfully had babies, but younger women shouldn’t rely on this happening to them.
What those statistics don’t mention is that, although the average age of menopause is 52, “average” means that it can happen younger as well as older. Menopause under 45 is called Early, which means that 45+ it’s merely normal. I’m 44 and well into the process, as is my 41 year old sister. A 37 year old friend is also having symptoms as “they go early in her family”.
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I work in the fashion industry and I say congrats to Colette , to have found love again and to have the chance to give Estella a sibling is a gift . 2 of my fashion clients in their mid forties are are having their first babies ( both conceived naturally during breaks from ivf )and they will be wonderful mothers .I had my first daughter at 30 and my second at 40 , falling pregnant in the second month of trying with both ! As for being pitied at school for being an older Mum , give me a break ! Women now look amazing at an older age the fact is there are heaps of older Mums now and age is a number ! I am friends with other Mums that are 20 years younger than me and I have never felt the pity ! If anything I am comfortable in my own skin and parent with confidence . Young or older mothers ? We have babies and are mothers – Lets just get on with it ! I would love to have Colette Dinangin as a Mum esp if you are a girl !!
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Is it just me or does anyone think. It’s a bit dangerous tohave a baby at 46?
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Dangerous in what way?
Dangerous for the mother or child?
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Actually dangerous for both mum and bubs.. Plenty more risks associated with being pregnant and delivering a healthy baby over the age of 40. Speak to any gyno
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Risks don’t equal danger. Every pregnancy carries risks, some more than others.
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Age plays a major part. Dont be delusional.
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It’s her risk, not yours.
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Some specialists may consider it dangerous but many don’t.
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Go Collette, you good thing!
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I wonder about the truth of that statistic saying that only 5% of women aged 25 take more than 12 months to conceive. I conceived my first baby at age 27 after 18 months of trying. After 13 months of trying I went to a doctor and due to my age and no obvious problems she urged me to give it another 6 months before I went down the testing road. I was just about to book that appointment to take things further whenI found out I was pregnant. And I know several women in the 25-28 age group (without fertility problems) to conceive their first child.
It took 11 months to conceive my second bub at age 29 and believe it or not my first go for baby number 3 at 33.
Of course it’s different for everyone, but fertility is such a number game I think, the luck of the draw.
I
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I don’t see older parents as a major issue. It all depends on the person. Not everyone can fall into the magic age of not too young not too old which seems to be 28 – 35.
My dad and step mum are older parents and it seems mostly good. They are more financially stable than my parents were, as are many older parents. They are still fit and reasonably energetic. The downside is a little out of touch – I have tried repeatedly to explain the dangers of Facebook but they don’t get it.
The benefits of older parents I have seen tend to outweigh the negatives.
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Just one more thing, Mia remind ‘anonymous’ about etiquette and dinner party rules, his or her comments are just inflammatory, offensive and rude. Nice to hide behind the moniker ‘anonymous’ as well, says it all really. Sorry if I ‘clogged’ up the health system as well, do pay for my private health, and work caring for others as a health professional in a hospital full time. Yes I am a huge burden, very offensive.
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Nice to hide behind the moniker ‘anonymous’ as well, says it all really.
We might have a user ‘name’ or use some other name, but on this forum as on other Internet forums we are all ‘anonymous’. You would have to be very brave to use your own real, legal name.
Using ‘sarahinadelaide’ is still being ‘anonymous’. It doesn’t give us any idea of who you actually are (which is a good thing…the internet being what it is).
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No, but there is a sense of accountability if you are a regular user of the same name.
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OK, so on a slightly unrelated note, I just switched over to Lifestyle You and the Sex Education show is on (fab show btw, very informative for a wide demographic) and they are discussing fertility. The host is 37 and is wanting to know how fertile she is as she and her partner hadn’t seriously thought about having kids until now (or until she was told to do the segment maybe).
It appears to me that although there is a definite decline from 37+, you could be 27 and still have trouble conceiving. I think it is not for us to judge what age you have kids. My nextdoor neighbour started trying at 25 and didnt get pregnant until her umpteenth round of IVF at 37. You never know!
Also, I’m curious (slightly unrelated here), can you estimate when you will start menopause from the age your mother was? I mean, my grandmother was 39 and my mum was about 41, so they were fairly close in age. Coincidence or typical correlation? I’d be interested to know!
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No scientific info to help but my Gran had my mum at 41, first try. I struggled to conceive at 33.
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You can get a test done to check your egg reserves. And generally your maternal history is a good indicator of roughly when you will go through menopause.
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No scientific info here either, but I have heard your menopause age is related to your mum’s. (I just googled ‘menopause family history’ and got lots of results.) So yes, you might be more likely to have it early. I’m 44 and having symptoms, as is my 2 years younger sister, and our Mum was about this age.
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I think it is subjective, some women at 50 can be extremely virile, fit and healthy and others at that age the complete opposite. Collette in my opinion fits in the first category, I am sure when her child is 20 she will still be a fit, healthy and engaged 67. My mum is 68 and in fantastic shape, young and dynamic in her views, travels extensively and still runs a successful business. Why are we so ageist? I agree if you gave birth to a child at 70 it would be selfish (as well as medically impressive!). Only due to the fact you would not be around for a long enough time to see all your child’s milestones and life events (graduations, weddings, grandchildren). I guess some may say I am an older mum, I am 38 with a 4 year old. All I can say is that I am fit, happy, healthy, fantastic husband (great for smile lines) and at the ELC school pickup see lots of mums my age all looking fabulous. Anyway people say I look 28 (thanks great genes) so yay to me and all us ‘older mums’. Congratulation Collette, and to all the particularly nasty comments made by some people below,maybe you need to reflect on where this negativity is coming from, basic psychology points to unhappiness and dissatisfaction in ones own life. I am just happy when a baby is born into a loving home and is cherished and wanted, whether the mother is 23 or 43.
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Given the number of people who have commented on this thread saying their mums/grandmas were 40+ giving birth, I think there is a clear body of proof that later-in-life pregnancies are fine.
My mum had me at 46. I am 22 now, and my mum is 68. She is in amazing shape, goes running daily, works full time and doesn’t intend to retire any time soon. She has for the past 30+ yrs looked at least 15 years younger than her real age. She married my dad who is 10 years younger than her, after a failed relationship with a partner who could not have children. Why should she have decided not to have a child when she could conceive one naturally? Surely that is nature’s way of telling you you’re still okay to have a baby?
I have not once suffered any detriment from having an older mum. In fact, I can honestly say that I have benefitted from my mum’s extra 10-15 years wisdom and education. She is my advisor on everything – life and academic study. Had she had me in her twenties, I don’t think she would have been able to impart so much life experience to me. For this, I am eternally grateful to her. My mum having me at 46 has made me a smarter, wiser person than I would otherwise have been.
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good for you for sharing…why are you all so concerned with women having children late….we have them when we can….end of story.
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Good on Collette! May you have a problem free pregnancy and healthy arrival. Women are so bitchy and I am over reading mamamia at times especially when there are stories on here about misogyny blah blah blah – women judge women more than men do. Goodnight
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I love Collette Dinnigan. She has been a long term supporter of fair trade and ethical fashion. Beautiful clothes – a little out of my price range unfortunately
I wish her the very best with her baby.
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I was criticised for having a baby at 22 (gasp! too young!! your life is OVER) and poor Collette is copping it for having a baby at 46. It seems that some of you are experts on fertility, so please, tell me, when is this magical window of opportunity where you are young enough to be deemed healthy by people who haven’t got a clue, yet old enough to be considered competent as a mother by the same people who haven’t got a clue? Hmm?
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This is the exact question I ask! A family member is pregnant at the moment (she’s 23) and another one is 28 and recently married. Another family member asked when Ms 28 will get pregnant. I suggested she’d do it at age 30/31 (she has recently begun a new career) and this family member said “Too old!”
Really? What is the difference between 29 and 31?
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Your 30′s. Hardly magical
No, I get what you’re saying and, really, women should just do whatever works for them. I also agree with the sentiments of what Collette has said – it’s very hard to get pregnant in your forties so don’t wait if you can help it!
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It’s become a cultural thing. Medically, at 22, you were possibly over the ideal age!
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Statistically the best age in Australia to have a baby is between 25 and 35. Apparently that is the age group with the healthiest newborns and the safest pregnancies and births.
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Thanks for that. I was just guessing and thinking more biologically, not taking into account healthcare, country etc but it is good to know the correct answer.
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My grandma had my dad at age 44 in 1942 – many women had their later babies at such ages in the past. He has gone on to live a life of public service, had two marriages, children, and is generally now a productive member of society still at 70. There are risks at all ages. It’s relative. This is what we have a health system for – to support the health of people throughout a normal life – which includes things like late pregnancies. People who are judging really need to get some perspective.
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I gotta be honest, I’m pretty disgusted at the negative comments regarding Colette’s news. I really hope that she never reads them and has her joy tainted by negativity from strangers on the internet who honestly feel that because they’re behind a keyboard they can say whatever they want but I guarantee if it was a close friend or family member of theirs who was in this situation there’s no way they would say “you’re an idiot, how could you do this to a child, think of what the other mothers in the playground will say!”
A wanted baby is a blessing, don’t turn something as wonderful as a baby into a negative.
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Cannot believe how judgemental people are – I don’t think I’m mother Therese but I can honestly say all I feel when I hear about older mothers having babies is really really happy for them (if that is what they wanted). Of all the older mums I have ever known I also think the kids are really lucky as well – these are women who are usually going into parenthood with 100% commitment. Good on you older mums!!!
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Congrats to Collette! I’m sure she is going to be an amazing mother. I had/have older parents & totally get the pros & cons of each position. My dad was in his early 50s when I was born and as result I became one of his carers for much of my teenage years before his death when I was 18. However, my mum was 42 when I was born and is still healthy as an ox & a wealth of experience at 62 yrs old.
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Congratulations. My mother had my brother at 23 and my sister at 26,then me at 35. She then got divorced and remarried and after I had grown up,started foster caring. At age 50 And I think she has been a far better mother to the foster children (brothers and sisters) then what she was to us. Not that she was horrible the opposite but she has more to offer now in wisdom and everything. Etc money. Her body obviously could make a baby and carry it. Age is nothing. Needless to say she ha a younger husband who will be around. Don’t so much agree with ivf (IMO) I have my son now,complete surprise at 19 ,2 years ago. I think I’m a great mum. Who rules the law that says who should and shouldn’t have children.
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Older mothers congesting our health system…
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yeah I am sure she is going to the local public hospital!
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All I can say anon is that I hope you are joking! The clogging up the “health system” is such a convenient excuse to be judgemental. The truth is that nearly all of us in same way or another impact on other people’s lives – I can assure you if anyone took the opportunity to dissect your life they would be able to find ways that you are burdening society as well.
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Yeah, those older mothers are unbelievable. The nerve when there are so many alcohol and drug related injuries waiting to be seen. So selfish.
And in case sarcasm is not transferrable on line, I am being it. What a stupid thing to write anonymous.
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What an ignorant comment. You could, if you were so arrogant and mean, say the same thing about people who smoke, who are overweight, who drink excessively, who don’t exercise, who do dangerous sports…… I could go on but won’t.
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Just wondering – there have been so many negative comments (and a lot of positive nice ones) – but I’m confused. What does it have to do with anyone but Collette and her husband? Why are people so very, very damning??
And in response to all those saying that the teenaged child will have a mum who’s too old, it might not be ideal but many people don’t have ideal situations. As long as the child is loved, what does this situation matter to anyone else?
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A wanted baby is a gift when ever it comes. My Mother and and Aunt on my dad’s side were both born to mothers over 46 in post war times. It may not be everyone’s choice but babies don’t always come when best suits their Mums.
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My mum, who, incidentally wasn’t an “older mum”, taught me that if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.
How in the world can people be negative about the miracle of pregnancy and having a baby? I am dumbfounded.
Congrats to Collette Dinnigan and her family. A new baby is the absolute best thing ever.
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I had older parents, and honestly I don’t think it’s a good idea. My parents just didn’t have the same energy levels as younger parents, so I missed out on a lot as a young kid (never played any sports, took any music classes etc. because they didn’t have the energy). By the time I was a teenager they had health issues related to their age (arthritis and knee/hip issues primarily), and I was always very aware of their limitations and didn’t do a lot of things because I knew it would be difficult for them (eg. I didn’t get a job until I could drive, because I knew it would be hard for them to drop me off/pick me up all the time). I also felt the need to move out of home ASAP so they could save for their retirement.
There was a real generation gap. They didn’t understand why computers were important, or why I needed the internet. Any new technology really. The education system had changed greatly since they were in school, so their help was almost always wrong. I was way, way behind my peers because of this, and in some ways still am.
Probably one of the worst things was going through puberty whilst my mum went through menopause. That was when I needed her the most, but she was wrapped up in her own craziness and was a nightmare to be around.
Their financial situation wasn’t great. They were very comfortable when I came along, but having a kid basically ate up all their money, and unlike younger parents they didn’t have another few decades to work and save for retirement after I’d left home. They retired with very little and died with almost nothing left (due to the cost of aged care and various medical expenses).
They both died when I was in my early 20′s. Apart from the obvious emotional impact, there was also long-lasting financial effects, as I had to use all my savings plus take out a loan in order to pay for their funerals. I missed my chance to buy property, and I’ve only just been able to afford to travel a little, about a decade after all my friends.
I always said I’d never have a child past 35, and now that I’m there, I believe more than ever that that’s the right thing for me. I’m still fit and healthy right now, but I’m starting to see the beginnings of what will one day be serious health issues. Every year that passes see’s my energy levels take a nose dive. I wouldn’t want to bring a child into the world only to be a burden on them.
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Thanks for sharing. I found your comment really interesting / thought provoking
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I agree with everything you said! I think people forget that babies from older parents actually grow into teens/young adults with grandparent age parents.
My parents are slightly older than average and my boyfriend’s are considerable older than average. I would suggest avoiding it if you can. We are in our mid twenties and facing caring for his parents in the next couple of years. This is a time in our lives when we should be travelling, focusing on careers, and setting ourselves up to have our own family.
Also, it kills my partner to know there is almost no chance our kids will know his parents.
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We have a friend who is an only child, they had him when she was around 44 and the father a bit older, they would be in their late 70′s-80′s. He is now about 33. He doesn’t have much to do with them, they are too old to be able play with their grand kids. he just felt like he was raised by grand parents’. He wanted to make sure he was young having kids.
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My mother was 40 when she had me. I am now 42 and have both parents healthy and living in their own home. They were well off when they had me and continued to increase their wealth. I did well at school and finished in the top 1% of the HSC in my year. My Dad used to get up on most Saturdays at 5am to take me to horse shows. We travelled overseas every 2 years and my parents still travel every couple of years and went to Hong Kong this year.
So I had a fabulous experience as the child of older parents. People’s experiences differ.
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Your parents sound amazing – to be still travelling overseas in their 80s is pretty special.
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Whilst I do see your point of view, I think it doesn’t represent the larger picture at all, illustrated by the large number of happy commenters with older parents. Your parents must have dies relatively young, which is awful. But I don’t think complaining about supporting yourself while paying for a funeral singles you out. Lots of us have had financial difficulties, especially trying to get onto the property ladder. puberty is revolting for many of us no matter what age your parents are, some get closer to their mums, many go the other way regardless of whether their mum has their own issues.
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You have my sympathy in regard to your difficult experience growing up.
But a huge amount of teenagers will have their mums going through menopause and the mums would have been relatively young when giving birth to them (around 35)
Even mums who give birth at age 25 may begin their first signs of menopause at age 40 (when the child is 15)
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I felt very happy for Collette Dinnigan when I read this news yesterday! I hope all continues to go well for her.
While I would like to have my family completed well before the age of 47, life doesn’t always work out the way you plan it. Of course there are many more risks in falling pregnant in your mid 40s than in your 20s or 30s, but some women are able to conceive and carry healthy babies well into their 40s. My mum had me at 38, my middle sister at 40 and my youngest sister at 42. My maternal grandmother had the last of her eight children at the age of 45, and my paternal grandmother had the last of her eleven children at the age of 46. Having said that, it is a risk to wait, and women should not look to celebrities like Collette Dinnigan for reassurance that it’s easy to fall pregnant well into your 40s. Collette may have conceived naturally, but as my gynaecologist said, most older Hollywood celebrities who have ‘miracle’ babies in their late 40s are using donor eggs.
Still, I think this is lovely news for Collette Dinnigan and her family and I wish them all the best!
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WOW, I cannot believe how nasty and judgemental some of these comments are. I am a 42 yr old first time mum with an 8 month old. I have a partner who works fifo 4 weeks on and one week off. So i am essentially doing it by myself.
I did not chose to do this and would happily have done it earlier, but i was told for many years that i would not be able to have children and that ivf would be an expensive waste of time so my 41 year old happy accident was a shock and surprise for both myself and my partner. Both of whom had come to terms with not having children.
I am surrounded by women in their 20′s and 30′s who also have their first bubs, and regardless of the age we all struggle with the same things, be it lack of sleep or teething or what solids to give and when. Age is irrelevant and a state of mind. I have as much energy as they do, and although had some complications at the birth due to the reasons i was not supposed to fall pregnant, had a blisteringly normal pregnancy.
I only hope that those who are obviously in their 20′s and so quick to judge and be critical don’t ever find themselves in a situation where all their plans go awry because they don’t meet mr right or their career takes off, they thought their baby time was done but they meet someone new they want to have a baby with or it just doesn’t happen only to find in their 40′s they are pregnant see it as the true blessing it is not as an annoyance, inconvienience or just plain wrong because of their age.
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HUGE Congrats to her and her family!
Beautiful news!
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I think it is so exciting, wonderful! I am also super impressed with Collette stating the practical in the media, good on her.
As a Gen x – we really were impressioned that we could have it all. Wrong. I focused way way too much on my career. But I also didn’t meet the right guy, or even close. Very sad for me as I always wanted to have a baby.
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Wow this article has brought out the superbitchy within the MM community and why I stopped reading MM for a few months. Good on Collette and all the best wishes for a healthy and happy baby. My sister ha a baby in her forties and looks better then most women and rocks out the older mum vibes! She looks and feel amazing and gorgeous to boot! It was meant to be.
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I agree! It seems as though people comment on here just to be nasty to each other instead of having adult conversations.
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100% it actually started to make me feel a bit down reading so much negativity that I took a self imposed MM sabbatical.
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There does seem to be a bit of a spike in fertility in the forties, due they think, to the ovaries going into overdrive, trying to get as many eggs out and fertilized before menopause. So the surprise baby for women this age is not unheard of. Personally, I think I’d want to shoot myself if it happened to me (at 44 now), but I’ve had 4 and the oldest will be 25 soon. Collette dinnigan is in a different situation to me and I’m sure will be fine.
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Agree Faybian- I have had 2 friends fall pregnant in their mid to late 40′s in what one of their doctors described as “your ovaries’ last stand”- apparently as you approach menopause it is not uncommon to release multiple eggs each month, rather than just one, thus increasing the chance of pregnancy. Mother Nature is quite canny sometimes.
(Also 44. Would also die if I fell pregnant- but all the best to Collette.)
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That’s why older mothers are more statistically likely to have twins!
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The old mums at primary schools stand out like sore thumbs & get pitied by other mums. I don’t wish to be in her shoes
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Oh come on. You see so many people who look old and they’re only 40. It’s all about how you think and if you exercise and look after yourself, eat well etc.
There are so many people who are only young, but they eat unhealthy foods, don’t exercise at all, and just don’t bother with their appearance. hence they look about 60.
I really think it’s a choice to look and feel old or not. And it’s definitely a choice to be healthy – of course many people succumb with serious illnesses and do all the right things. but so many people eat bad foods, don’t exercise, smoke, drink too much and yes they are ill.
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I’d rather be an older mum than a judgemental, small minded and dull little person. Just personally.
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Vegas – love it!!!!
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Hate to be an old mum. Would rather be a little judgemental any day.
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I’d hate to be an idiot.
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I never said you were Vegas. Dont think so low of yourself…
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I agree it’s idiotic to have a baby at such an old age.
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I agree Vegas, who would want to have a child in their late 40′s… Idiotic I say.
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Haha Anonymous/Rainbow, it’s obvious you are the same negative nasty person trolling this page and agreeing with your own comments.
I feel sorry for you, such an angry, spiteful little person. I hope your life improves soon.
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the kid’s going to have a young-ish dad. that okay with you?
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I agree with Vegas! I’m a 41 year old mother of a 2 year old – and she brings me more joy than I ever imagined. My partner and I think about what it will be like for her to have older parents and so we eat well and exercise so we have energy and good health. My parents were divorcing when I was my daughter’s age (2) they were dealing with being single parents in their 20s, working, studying, and dating and remarrying ( frankly – awful step mother and step father) and I look at my daughter and think she couldn’t have two more loving, stable parents – so it’s true – people need to stop judging and instead send Collette their blessings! Ps I would have started having a family earlier if I’d known how hard it was to get pregnant in my late 30s – good on Collette for making it clear a pregnancy in one’s 40s is not a sure thing and not to put off starting a family if that is what you want – a few close friends warned me not to put it off and I think it was brave of them because at the time I thought I had all the time in the world.
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Bullshit! My children are in primary school and Mum’s stand out for lot’s of different reasons but age is not one of them! What a ridiculously untrue thing to say..
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and that’s so much more important than her having a wanted and loved child who I’m sure will love her as much as any child loves their mommy….gee, imagine all we wouldn’t do if we were still worried about what they’d say in the school yard
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Serious question Anonymous: I can understand that older mother might ‘stick out like sore thumbs’, but why are they pitied?
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What crap! I’d definitely be considered an older mum (had my second at 38) but I’m often mistaken for a ‘young mum’. One example. I was making small talk with a check out chick and she commented that it was good I was having my babies nice and early (I had both my kids with me aged about 5 and 1 at the time).
The older mums at my son’s school are fucking hot too!
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Your school is probably in a low socio economic area. I had my first baby in a hospital that mainly drew that kind of population and I stood out as being older. I was 28. Goodness knows what they would have thought when I had number 4 at 36!
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little miss negative anonymous…you might need professional help. I am 46 and could look younger than you in the schoolyard.
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My grandmother was 48 in 1961. Went along to the doctor and told him she thinks she “is with child number 6.” To which he repied “no Mrs you are going through the change.” You would never question a doctor so the next time she saw him was 9 months later and she had a perfectly healthy new born. No antenatal care, no screening, no ultrasound, no c section. Bravo!
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Bravo indeed! What an awesome story
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So I am a “freak of nature” as well! Just had my second child (first at 43 years) at age 47. Not planned at all, just lucky. What’s wrong with old mothers in the schoolyard? I am still planning on starting the mothers netball team at our school! Good on you Collette- I wore one of your dresses at my wedding (age 41) Perhaps I was too old to get married as well?
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I had my last child (now just turned seven) when I was 44; she was a total surprise, and it was the easiest pregnancy I’ve had! She is our treasure, and we were very blessed to have a healthy, beautiful, clever little girl. My mom was 40 when she gave birth to my youngest brother, and my grandmother was 47 when she gave birth to my youngest uncle (who was only 18 months old when I was born). Coming from a large Catholic family, this is the norm for us. As my mom says,”We had kids when we had energy, and then kids when we had money!” When I had my first baby at 24 I was so immature I cringe when I think of it. There are definite advantages to becoming a parent when you are financially stable and more secure with yourself. I don’t see what all the fuss is about really- there is nothing new about over-40 moms, and there is nothing wrong with it, either.
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Exactly Patte – my grandma was 40 when she had my Dad – he was the youngest of 7. My life unfolded differently and I had my baby girl when I was 40, but she’s my youngest and only. The only issue I have is with people thinking they can defer motherhood til their late 30s and 40s and then being surprised when they have fertility issues. I was amazingly lucky, but I would always say, if you know you want kids, and you have met a person with whom you want kids, don’t put it off.
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My mum had me- 100% naturally- when she was 41. My dad was 33. Look, it has it’s good parts and it’s bad. My parents were financially secure when I was born. I had lots of overseas trips, private schools, nice clothes, horses, lessons in whatever I wanted, student exchange … and my parents had lives before me, I didn’t steal their youth.
The downside is that I am 20 and my mum, who I love to bits, is 61. I’m scared that I won’t have her for more than 15-20 years. She’s scared of this too, though we never talk about it. I can’t advise it. Because of this alone. I would advise older parents to think about the welfare of their children in twenty years or more.
I plan to have children before I’m 33 or not at all.
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I totally understand as my parents had me when they were quite old(er) as well. But the fact is that parents can be killed young, in car accidents, illness etc etc.
I have a few friends whose either both or one parent died very young, 20′s and early 30′s.
We never know how long our parents are going to live, so why stress about them being older. Treasure the time you have, cause you just never know what fate may bring.
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Real life case study – I have 6 longtime girlfriends who have mothers who are 70+ (we’re all 31). I can personally vow that none of them ever were or felt disadvantaged or were picked on because of this. My mother was 20 when she had me and everyday growing up I was made to feel like I stole her youth. Conclusion: It’s a womans behaviour that determines if she’s good mother – not age!!
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Really terrific comment Rosie.
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Perfectly said!
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I so agree. I had both my kids by the time I was 21 and felt my youth was stolen. The upside is that you get another life down the track when the kids leave home. Some maturity would have been good to have
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Energy does not seem to be a problem for this amazing, highly successful business woman.
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And how do you know??
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I think it’s fairly evident from her work output, for one thing. She travels extensively and also looks as though she’s very physically fit, so I for one, would be very surprised if she was ‘lacking in energy’!
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Ummm because you don’t become a massive success in the fashion industry without a lot of energy, dedication and effort. Fairly obvious I would have thought.
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My mother in law had her seventh child at 47, naturally. It has been a long road with lots of problems. Now 23, my sister in law has one parent in a nursing home. She feels she missed out on a lot having older parents but particularly ones who already had six older children. Of course they all love one another and wouldn’t have it any other way but she has lots of learning difficulties etc. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having children older but from this experience I wouldn’t want to personally.
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Congratulations Collette – great news! Why do people get so ‘narky’ toward older women having babies? What’s the problem? Why does being close to menopause make me a worse mother than a twenty something mother? I may have hot flushes but ‘she’ will continue to have PMS for the next 20+ years. Whats the difference? How does it effect ones ability to be a mother??? As an older Mum, I knew that I really wanted this baby and that I was also willing to give EVERYTHING I could to my baby. I had travelled, worked at a job I loved, had several failed relationships before I met mr right at 38. How can you tell me I was wrong to try for a baby at nearly 40? Why should I miss out on the one thing I had wanted all my life just because I met my husband later in life? I am far more responsible now than i was in my 20′s and 30′s! And finacially secure too! Is this wrong? New life is a gift from God and should be cherished whenever it comes your way! I think those who have children and neglect them are far more reprehensible than older mothers, who love their children and want only the best for them. Good luck Collette!
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What she said!
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I suffered dreadfully at the hands of my older Mother!
She tortured me relentlessly with awe inspiring tales of her adventures, travels and life experiences, hounded me with advice derived from years of experience, brainwashed me with her spirit and lust (not mearly love) for life, forced old fashioned values and manners onto me that have served me very well indeed throughout my life. She flaunted her ability to be the same as the other, less cruel, younger school Mums and still, absolutely refuses to act her age…
She is older, and statistically will die sooner than those kind young Mums but then again, one of my friends died at 32 and left two primary age sons behind… there goes that argument.
As for the argument about having a sixty year old Mum, myself and two very fit male friends got left behind in our late twenties by a woman in her sixties whilst mountain climbing in the Himilaya. She kicked our butts on a number of hills and was not any worse for wear (to my embarrassment, I was!!!).
… Its about the person, not the number. Judge yourself before you judge others.
So Congrats Collette! Go for it, and don’t tell anybody how old you are, it will only inspire those who think they can judge you!
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Love what you wrote!!
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Yah! Well said! xx
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Goosebumps!
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My mum had my little sister at 43 – and I’m grateful every day for it, because my sister is the best person in the whole world (she’s now 19). They’re really close, mum is fit and energetic, and all of the anxiety, insecurity or neurosis she may have had when she was younger have disappated.
When she was a young woman in her 30s, she was flat out developing a fantastic career, working out who she was and what she wanted, working through an unhappy marriage and raising a couple of demanding children. Now she’s older, she has chilled out a lot more, developed (through conscious decision) a much more positive attitude and is in a better financial position to be there emotionally and physically for us. She doesn’t stress about every tiny thing, she knows when to pick her battles, she’s better educated in life – she’s a much better parent now.
Different situations occur for everyone, but in our case it was my mum’s older birth age that made her a better mother. I’m not saying that everyone should deliberately put off motherhood because you can only be a good mum at an older age – but I think to say being an older mum is a bad thing is a very limited, unhelpful and incorrect view.
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