by REBECCA SPARROW
This video freaks me out as much as it makes my heart burst with happiness.
You see, there’s ONE golden rule of parenting. And it’s not about how love is enough. Or the importance of routines. Or how this too shall pass. Or the fact that once you become a parent you develop this weird habit of referring to yourself in the third person (Mummy needs to wee!). Nope. It’s this: Never ever give your child a comfort toy that cannot be easily replaced.
I’m not entirely sure that’s sinking in to the non-parents reading this post so let me repeat it with a bit of bold and leaning on the caps lock key: NEVER EVER give your child a comfort toy that cannot be easily replaced. Are you with me? Are you listening?
Just trust me as I learned this lesson the hard way.
Ava’s bunny … talk about smug.
When I had my daughter Ava, a friend returned from France with a soft, squishy adorable brown bunny for her. And instead of saying, “Merci friend. But I’m going to stick this obscure French bunny that is clearly one-of-a-kind at the back of the cupboard and re-gift it the moment you leave the room”…I said, “Yay! This bunny will be the prefect cuddle toy for Ava!!!”
This is because I am le stupide.
Four years later my daughter cannot sleep without that damn bunny. He’s her friend, her confident, and her comforter. In turn, that bunny has become a smug bastard. I swear he knows we cannot live without him. That our very existence hinges on his presence. He’s a bit like Simon Cowell on X Factor.
After a few close calls, (me screaming: “WE HAVEN’T GOT BUNNY!” in a variety of cafes, taxis and airport lounges across the country) I have been on a global hunt for a replacement bunny. Let me just say that trying to use French Google at 1am is about as fun as sitting through your obnoxious sister-in-law’s law graduation.
Anyway, this post isn’t about me. It’s about Ah-ah the blue monkey. Watch. Laugh. Cry. But just remember, this is a cautionary tale. You have been warned …
Did you or does your child have a special toy? Any close calls or disasters?
Comments
129 Comments so far
Can SOMEONE pls tell me what the video is called as the link does not work from iPads. It’s not (ah ah’s back) as mentioned below? What is it called
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lk34j3HUJbE&feature=player_embedded
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One day when I was pregnant with my now 4 year old, I decided to buy a little white stuffed penguin. SOMETHING told me he’d love it to pieces, so I impulsively bought two of them and stashed one away.. Just in case.
I was right, one of his very first 5-week-old smiles was at this stuffed penguin, and over time, he became quite emotionally attached to it, and it came EVERYWHERE with us. And I mean everywhere.
My moment of hard-core-self-praise came approximately 2 years later – On our way home one day, we lost his precious Penguin at a train station…..
He was DEVASTATED – I could never bear to see that heartbroken look in his eyes again.
We got home, and I pulled out the second Penguin.
I will NEVER, EVER forget that moment, my little man looked at me in such wonder and amazement…
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I had a doll that I adored called “Negrita”. When I had eye surgery when I was 4, my dad put an eye patch on her on the same eye I had surgery on.
I’m 37 and every now and then I think of her and wonder where she might be…
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Whilst this was a lovely video and a wonderful reunion. I have one question – why did someone pick up an old blue monkey from the forest and think “I can sell this”?? (lucky they did)
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‘Niagara Falls’ after watching this!
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my son has tiggers, which cost around $8 at Big W. The advice given to me was not to get something unique. So my son has “stripey tiggie” who is the original, as well as “other tiggies”, 2 of them, since Disney changed the design of the Tiggers slightly, so that the newer ones had faint stripes that wore off. They get washed often and he identifies “stripey” as special. We have lost some of the ringers, but he seems non-plussed when a new one comes along.
Also I gave him muslins – white cotton as his blankie. He has many on rotation and seems ok with the large number in circulation, and they are easily replaced or can have ring-ins bought if it is forgotten.
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I just got a bit teary watching that video! I still have my old favourite teddy bear – his name was Growler and he had a little box inside his chest that made him growl when you tipped him upside down.
I remember the Christmas I got him. We drove to my Grandma’s house on Christmas Eve and he was all wrapped up in his box int he boot of the car. Every time we went over a bump he’s make the growling noise and I was convinced there was a sheep in the boot. When I picked up the box on Christmas morning to unwrap it I was too scared to open it because it made the noise and I thought there was a sheep in it!
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Growler. Excellent.
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I had one that growled too – got it for my third birthday and named her Tedina. My cousin remarked at the time that she’d like to see that bear in a year or so. As an only child, that bear was my friend and companion and I dressed it in my old baby clothes. Well, fifty-five years later, Tedina’s still around. Admittedly she’s a bit thin on top when I experimented with my father’s razor and gave her a buzz cut, and one of the glass eyes is missing, but apart from that, she’s still gorgeous.
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I had a teddy just like this! I lost him somewhere camping, but luckily he had our address tied around his neck (Mum always did this when we went away- I lost him all the time). Some nice anonymous person posted him back!
Now if I find a lost toy anywhere, I always make a point to turn it in somewhere, you just never know what it could mean to someone!
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Gorgeous!
After a couple of close calls, I am currently on a global search for a back-up Teddy, before major disaster strikes! (A pink velour Kaloo flat teddy with a hat….anyone……please?!!!!)
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Oh yes, our youngest has a minkplush dog, affectionally named “woofa”. Last year his aunt took him to the city for a day out and had a Mcdonald’s lunch, which is 2 hour drive from our house. Upon bedtime we couldn’t find “Woofer” anywhere, Ahhh. I finally rang my sister to ask his where a bouts only to hear the deafening silence on the other end. Finally, she replied, ‘he is at Mcdonald’s with a balloon tied to his paw”. Luckily my husband didn’t mind getting away from the screaming during his four hour drive to fetch “woofa”.
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For this of us with iPads, what is the actual video called on tube, as I can’t find it? And can’t load directly via this link. I’ve typed in various things “child reunion/blue money” etc no luck
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I think it is ‘ah-ah’s back’
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Awwww!!! Ah-ah!! Such a beautiful video!! What a lovely start to my day
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Thankfully my daughter has never played favourites with her soft toys. They all take turns each night and rarely does she bring one to the shops ect. But my Godson is surgically attatched to a bunny and my poor friend has had many desperate searches through shopping centres and put alerts on Facebook for people to keep an eye out for the same bunny as a replacement. So I feel your pain Bec.
P.S “about as fun as sitting through your obnoxious sister-in-law’s law graduation.”…this line made me nearly wet myself as I have one of these in my family.
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My kids have special toys that they cuddle at bed time but the golden rule in our house is that these special sleep toys DO NOT leave the house!! Furthermore with the benefit of hindsight I would say an even better rule would be for special sleep toys to not even leave the bed – then there would be no desperate scramble searching the house at bed time when everyone (including the parents) are tired and grumpy!!
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This is our rule too. My now 4 year old is a stuffer so she stuffs her teddy in any place she can which can turn the household upside down at bedtime. It is comforting to know that it HAS to be there somewhere. We have had many near disasters which led to the rule! Our two main teddy loving kids chose our older daughter’s teddies to fall in love with and they were presents when she was a baby so there is no easy replacement. I found one such replacement in France one time when I was thinking a backup would be a good idea.
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My husband brought home a tiny lamb for our firstborn. That lamb was a prototype. It went everywhere with her. It got lost or left many times. Could not be ever replaced. We had to return to many locations to pick it back up again. Today she is 27. She still has Lamb. Have faith. Trust the process.
Other daughter had a pound puppy. She would hook the hind legs over her shoulders at the front to carry it. It became disgusting and one day no amount of washing and stitching back together would revive it. Today we have a selection of pound puppies, all bought on eBay, none really resembling the demised pet!
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Only two weeks ago what was supposed to be a quick trip to Bunnings for my husband turned into 2 1/2 hours searching the aisles and asking every enthusiastic worker for Teddy to no avail. I was not with them and I couldn’t let it go that Teddy was gone (I’ll admit I shed my own tears) so had to return to the store myself just before close where I had an embarrassing over excited reaction when I spotted Teddy sitting on the counter. We now have a blanket rule that Teddy can no longer leave the car, EVER.
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My youngest son Ryan (4) has about 6 tigers for this exact reason. I learnt my lesson with the first two kids haha
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i am sure ah ah’s much happier too… lovely story !
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Our son has a stuffed little dog aptly named “Dog” and we have had a few close calls where he has had to be posted back from hotels etc. But a surreal thing happened as I was walking home from dropping him off at school. It was general cleanup day and I took a peek in a big box of soft toys and found another “Dog” perfectly clean and new with his tag still on. I took him home and positioned him next to old “Dog” (boy there was a difference – so worn and discoloured) and waited for Charlie’s reaction when he came home. He was so amazed! Now that would have been worth videoing!
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My beautiful big ted is 40 years old and my 5yo daughter won’t let him out of her sight. I couldn’t have wished for a better custodian for him. Would it wrong for me to sneak him into my bed every now and again?
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After seeing this vid today and feeling so bad after taking my sons blankie away 10 months ago ( to stop thumb sucking association. It worked ) I gave it back to him tonight after he was having a difficult evening (dad away, not sufficient attention from me, 4 yr old emotions etc etc) reAction was similar and he was so happy to see blankie again.
Time will tell if it was a bad decision on my part!!
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My son has puppy. He is 4 1/2 years old. Puppy goes everywhere and is great comfort at times. If all he needs is a yellow rag (what puppy looks like) to help get you through those challenging times THEN SO BE IT i say!! It is not a bad decision. He will decide its not ‘cool’ in his own time.
I think time will tell you are an awesome mum
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Oh my god, that made me cry! What tremendous good luck…
We had a close call with my daughter’s toy cat, ‘Snowy’ once in a shopping centre. I realised about 45min later in Woollies that she didn’t have it and traced our steps back through 4/5 different shops till we found her still under the Thomas display in Myer. Pheeee-ew! On the way out the shopping centre that day, I passed an engravers who engraved a pet tag with my phone number and “Snowy” on it and we attached it to her ribbon collar. It did come in handy one time, too, as she dropped it in the cold section of the shops one day and a woman called me within 15mins! I’ve already scoured the internet to no avail to see if I can find her match as we bought Snowy in Ireland. Fortunately, Snowy stays home nowadays as my daughter has just started school.
Pet ID tags are the way to go!
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My son was given at least 30 soft toys when he was a baby and the only soft toy he would hug was a blue turtle that a friend bought at a chemist. He began sleeping with it at around 6 months and has never slept a night without it since. he hugs it so tight at night and it just makes my heart melt. I don’t let him take it out of the house much, but he does go on trips with us. I have since bought 2 back ups on ebay!! He has the creative name of ‘turtle’. haha
Love the video
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I was lucky my sister law warned me, she had problems with her son and his lucky blanky. So I bought 6 copies of an item, I encouraged my first child to have any one of the 6.
And still suffered the problem of forgetting to take it with us, dammmmm!!!!
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Weeping…
We had a close call with my daughter’s toy cat, ‘Snowy’ once in a shopping centre. I realised about 45min later in Woollies that she didn’t have it and traced our steps back through 4/5 different shops till we found her still under the Thomas display in Myer. Pheeee-ew! On the way out the shopping centre that day, I passed an engravers who engraved a pet tag with my phone number and “Snowy” on it and we attached it to her ribbon collar. It did come in handy one time, too, as she dropped it in the cold section of the shops one day and a woman called me within 15mins! I’ve already scoured the internet to no avail to see if I can find her match as we bought Snowy in Ireland. Fortunately, Snowy stays home nowadays as my daughter has just started school.
Pet ID tags are the way to go!
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What a great idea to put pet id tags on them. thanks Katy
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THAT IS GOLD! Such a good idea!!!
Thank you!
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I bet a lot of people who watched this felt his joy but also sadness for their own toy/ human/ pet that disappeared one day…
I know I did.
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We had a close call with my daughter’s toy cat, ‘Snowy’ once in a shopping centre. I realised about 45min later in Woollies that she didn’t have it and traced our steps back through 4/5 different shops till we found her still under the Thomas display in Myer. Pheeee-ew! On the way out the shopping centre that day, I passed an engravers who engraved a pet tag with my phone number and “Snowy” on it and we attached it to her ribbon collar. It did come in handy one time, too, as she dropped it in the cold section of the shops one day and a woman called me within 15mins! I’ve already scoured the internet to no avail to see if I can find her match as we bought Snowy in Ireland. Fortunately, Snowy stays home nowadays as my daughter has just started school.
Pet ID tags are the way to go!
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Oh my god, that made me cry! What tremendous good luck…
We had a close call with my daughter’s toy cat, ‘Snowy’ once in a shopping centre. I realised about 45min later in Woollies that she didn’t have it and traced our steps back through 4/5 different shops till we found her still under the Thomas display in Myer. Pheeee-ew! On the way out the shopping centre that day, I passed an engravers who engraved a pet tag with my phone number and “Snowy” on it and we attached it to her ribbon collar. It did come in handy one time, too, as she dropped it in the cold section of the shops one day and a woman called me within 15mins! I’ve already scoured the internet to no avail to see if I can find her match as we bought Snowy in Ireland. Fortunately, Snowy stays home nowadays as my daughter has just started school.
Pet ID tags are the way to go!
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OMG, I had a monkey similar to Ah-ah when I was a kid.
I would have been devastated if he’d been lost. Thankfully, he’s stored somewhere safe in my wardrobe – forever.
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My first son had Bunny and they were inseparable – Bunny moved out with him when he left home as an adult. My second son had a hand woven wrap gifted by my godfather. We called it his “friend” When it got holes in one end from being loved I cut the end off and made two “little friends” from the pieces. Big friend lived at home in bed and the little friends had adventures in the car and got to go exciting places like the rag soaking bucket at kindy (!) I will always remember asking him “How was kindy today – do you have fiends at kindy?” and he looked at me like I was a real twit and said “Yes – my little friend it is in my bag” He is still the most literal of my four monkey boys.
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It is very unusual for me to cry at this sort of thing, as heartwarming as it is, but I have TEARS! So so beautiful, and the little boy looks JUST like my not-so-little-anymore brother did at this age! Just gorgeous. Great article Bec. xx
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Sweet & weird at the same time! This video is going to haunt him for the rest of his life (that’s a whole new article!)! Imagine the embarrassment if he is famous (sports star – oh god!) one day!
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Yep… I’m wiping away the tears too. My 6 year old son has a blanket from when he was a baby called Stinky – and my 3 year old has a stuffed worm called Wormie – if they ever go missing we call out to them by their names – the neighbours must think we’re nuts….
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Both my kids have comfort toys – and before I gave them to them for the first time, I made sure they were availble online and bought four! They were only around $11 each. Best piece of mind purchase ever!
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It doesn’t play for me either
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http://theberry.com/2012/09/11/this-is-sweet-ah-ahs-back-video/
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Hilarious! I loved this article – so true, but still so funny to read. By the way, I live in the French part of Switzerland and I’m sure I’ve seen this bunny hanging out in toy stores… I’m happy to help you get a replacement (or few)…
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Oh this is beautiful. Must find tissues.
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I am sobbing! How amazing was that video?
I still have Pooky my bear. He has a burnt eye, scratched nose and is a little ragged. I love him like the day I got him
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I must not be meant to have children, because this video just annoyed me.
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It doesn’t mean you’re not meant to have children – This would have annoyed me and I probably would not have even watched this video before I had children…
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Same here. What I don’t understand is how they could learn the concept of losing something forever if you keep duplicates? If you lose it, you grieve for it, then move on. Or else how could they cope when their parents die?
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I have 3 kids and it annoyed..
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Ok I promise I’m not a weirdo with attachment problems but i’m 24 and my blankie is still tucked under my pillow…
It has been through the wars, the edges are singed from being tumble dried, a large chunk was cut off to give to our neighbours for when I stayed there and forgot to take blankie and I once had a fight with a Spanish cleaner in a hostel in Barcelona for taking it by mistake (yes, blankie went backpacking…lol… awks).
When i was little I only liked blankie when it felt cool so I would put it in the freezer, or in the freezer of whoever’s house we happened to be in. My parents were forever retrieving blankie from freezers all over the place.
If I ever have children I’m not sure if i’ll give them a comfort toy… On one hand I would hate to deny them their own blankie, but on another it can be disatrous.
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Lol! Just picturing your parents asking their friends if they can please put your blankie on ice. What do you think would happen if you threw it away now? Would you not be able to cope? I find it really interesting.
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For those of you with children who are wearing their ‘blankies’ so thin that they might disintegrate in the next wash, try this old trick: Sew it on to a new blanket or quilt.
Here’s what you do: Buy a cot blanket or ready-made small quilt, then in your best zig-zag stitch (and with your child watching you), attach the blankie to one side. Even if all you can salvage is a few squares of it, do it.
You’re not replacing your child’s blankie – you’re breathing new life into the old one. Importantly, children who are really attached seem to be fine with the new look, just as long as they can recognise their old much loved blankie in the new regeneration. Watching you or grandma sew it on the new quilt helps them understand exactly what’s happening.
Helps overcome the trauma of washing it as well.
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my older daughter had a teddy bear that turned into a favourite that we bought at Ikea of all places. One night she was up vomitting and teddy got caught up in it all and had to be washed. She had a lot of trouble getting back to sleep without him and the next day I went back and bought two more. These were on rotation without her knowledge for a while, though I always told her that he was being washed. The suspicious looks and “Teddy smells different, he feels different” were eventually met with the truth and she now has all three in her possession. There is a favourite though, just last week she was adamant that the favourite teddy has different eyes and ears – “thats how I know he’s the one”. He went to preschool with her most days and sometimes still makes the trip to school as well. To her Teddy is totally real.
My second daughter received a blabla knitted soft toy Mermaid from Santa for her first Christmas. At this stage there was no way to tell what was going to be a favourite with her but this Mermaid soon went to the top of the list. I tried to get another one online but it was going to be very expensive and I didn’t in the end. She also picked up another favourite, a Holly Hobbie pillow doll that I bought on Etsy and she sleeps on this, on top of her regular pillow every night. On a recent holiday in Thailand on the morning of departure Mermaid was nowhere to be found. Daughter seemed calm, I was distraught. My husband eventually worked out that she must have got tangled in the sheets when housekeeping changed them and maybe she would be down at reception via the laundry. She was. I cannot explain the relief when I saw her and my daughter tried to remain nonchalant but hugged her extra hard.
Little boy has two favourites for sleep – a hideous blue bear and a Gruffalo toy. He is attached but far less so than his older sisters were.
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I got a toy sheep (white with a lace pick collar around the neck and yellow hair) when I was about 7 or 8 and I called her Snowflake (because I’m clearly so creative) and throughout the various years (I’m 18 now) she has been lost in the house, put in the washer and has been to many camps with me. I’d be devastated if I lost her!
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Lucky for me my kids have not become attached to any comfort toys. My comforter is my pillow that i got my my now deceased dad when i was 2! Needless to say many years later and countless repairs and cleaning and trials with new fancy pillows I still sleep with it! It is the emotional ans sentimental attachment that wont allwo be to part with it.
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Yeah, I’ve had the same pillow for years as well. Repaired, washed, new pillows trialled etc etc. Only like my own pillow. Having said that, I would NEVER let anyone see what’s underneath the fancy schmancy pillow slip, they’d have a heart attack!
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….. and THIS is why I am sure to rotate my kids’ toys and blankets, and they are generally kept in the cot and definitely NOT taken out of the house (unless for sleepovers). I cant imagine letting my kids drag blankets/toys everywhere we went, let alone spending a childhood chasing the things down!
Lol, sorry that sounds harsh but I guess Im realistic like that!
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I cried, what an amazing story!!
My just turned 2 son has a blue and white striped elephant called Wayne. He loves it to death, he sleeps with it every night, we have managed to keep him home though, if we go out Wayne stays home on the couch. He desperately needs a bath though, I am too scared to pop him in the washing machine so he has had a couple of Fabreeze sprays. I honestly do not know what we would do if we ever lost him…
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My 13 y.o. still sleeps with his ‘rag with one eye’. He received the gift from Nanna the day he was born. He used to sit under the clothes line on wash day so I decided to buy a 2nd one to rotate around. Eventually sometime later my son took a special liking to one of them & would refuse the identical one. Our special member of the family aka Lamby has been lost at shopping centres & ice-cream parlours but we always found him. The mint condition one is waiting for a 21st and the thread bare rag with only one eye left goes to all sleepovers & school camps but kept hidden & ready for a quick cuddle.
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My 13 y.o. still sleeps with his ‘rag with one eye’. He received the gift from Nanna the day he was born. He used to sit under the clothes line on wash day so I decided to buy a 2nd one to rotate around. Eventually sometime later my son took a special liking to one of them & would refuse the identical one. Our special member of the family aka Lamby has been lost at shopping centres & ice-cream parlours and still always came home after frantic searches. The mint condition one is waiting for a 21st and the thread bare rag with only one eye left goes to all sleepovers & school camps but kept hidden & ready for a quick cuddle.
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Oh I love this! My two and a half year old son has ‘bear’ who once was a beautifully soft fluffy bear and now looks like he has hard a hard life! Bear is now grey and no longer fluffy he is so worn and looks filthy even though he gets washed every week! We had 2 bears that were equally as worn until about 2 months ago we left a westfield shopping centre and realised once we got to the car that Bear was gone? I ran back inside and tried to retrace our steps which is near impossible, I asked at the information desk and in every shop we went into that day and no one had seen bear. Luckily we had the two however now it became very difficult to wash the one and only bear. I ventured back to the shop that sold bear and got another one but my son can tell the difference! He now refers to them as old bear and new bear. New bear is so nice and clean and fluffy but he will only go to bed with new bear if he has old bear too!
Lesson learnt for future children have multiple comfort toys that are equally worn! My next child will have 10 excessive I know but I would rather stick hot pins in my eyes than try to get him to sleep without Bear its just not an option!
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Bec, just like you I have spent quite a chunk of time on French Google. My search however was for a French mole named Satty – why do children always attach themselves to the most exotic toys! We first lost Satty on a trip to South Africa. Devastation and sleepless nights drove us to revisit every shop, tourist attraction & winery we had visited. Thankfully we were lucky and Satty was returned. The next disappearance happened in Ikea and we weren’t so lucky. The young Ikea staff that I harassed several times a day for months, just didn’t seem to understand my desperation and I found myself on the internet tracking down another Satty. 100 Euros later (that damn mole was expensive + postage) and many sleepless nights, she arrived in the post. We explained her absence and new, un-matted fur as a holiday in the South of France (lucky Satty). We now have a spare mole in the cupboard just in case and her new baby sister won’t be getting anything so fancy. All small soft toys will be of the common, Australian variety.
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Ha ha! So there are two of us trawling through bizarre French websites!
I was never able to find an exact replica of Ava’s bunny. I found one that was close but not the same.
If you ever see one on your travels, let me know!
xxxx
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