Grace
by GRACE BELLAVUE
At the end of the day, language becomes our identity.
I remember the first time the language surrounding this broke my heart.
“Where is all this money coming from Grace? You’re only seventeen, you can’t be earning this from the bakery. What are you doing? I don’t believe you’re selling drugs, but it’s the only thing I can think of. You are saying you’re going to parties you aren’t attending, you’re not our daughter anymore, you’ve turned into something else.”
My mother paced the kitchen as I sat at the table playing with the runner, twisting its tassels between my fingers.
“No I’m not selling drugs mum, I’m a prostitute. I f*ck men for a living.”
My mother visibly retched, as my father leant against the back wall for support. I’ve never seen him grow so old in a moment since.
“Oh god, I’m going to vomit,” mum said. She steadied herself on the doorframe, half running to the toilet.
My father began to cry. I’d never seen my father cry before.
A highly successful manager, and alpha male, he always dominated and led his men. He could walk into a pub and have a bar surrounding him in a few minutes, engaging, talking. People were attracted to my father like moths to a flame. There was something strong, good and fiercely independent about him that women flirted with and men followed.
“You’re my daughter Grace. How, f*ck. How can you let them do that do you? What did I do wrong? Oh god. Why? Why the f*ck are you doing this? Oh sh*t, I need to sit down. How can you be a whore? Don’t you know how they see you? How they talk, oh god, I feel sick. Please tell me I’m dreaming, for the love of god please tell me I’m dreaming.”
“No I’m not selling drugs mum, I’m a prostitute. I fuck men for a living.”
“I’m sorry daddy,” I responded. I could hear my mother retching in the ensuite up the hallway, her convulsions only broken by her sobs.
“Oh Grace, god, I love you so much, why? Why are you doing this?”
Tears continued to roll down the face of the only man I’d ever loved at that stage. It broke my heart.
“How? How the f*ck are you doing this? How can they let you do this? You’re f*cking seventeen for God’s sake, you’re not a f*cking whore.” I had never heard him swear so much in my company.
“I just rang them up, had an interview. They didn’t ask for ID.”
“Oh god. Is this some sick nightmare? How long have you been working?”
“A few months.”
“You know you’ve broken your mother’s heart? We gave you everything, love, a home, values, a good upbringing, fuck I even worked my ass off to give you a good school. You are so intelligent, what, are you going to throw all these scholarships, all these programs, all this time, all these people who just think you can be everything you can be, and you want to be a f*cking whore?”
“Dad, it’s not like that.”
My mother emerged from the bathroom, bloodshot eyes and as old as my father. For the first time I was no longer their daughter, but a very alien stranger.
Finally my mother spoke.
“Please leave Grace, you need to move out if you are going to keep doing this. This is not what we brought you up to be. We love you, but cannot have you under our roof any longer if this is to continue. “ I looked at my father.
“Please leave, for we do not know what you have become.”
I am a sex worker, whore, prostitute, harlot, hooker, professional slut, fetishist, dominatrix at times, submissive often
I left.
I am a sex worker, whore, prostitute, harlot, hooker, professional slut, fetishist, dominatrix at times, submissive often and just a normal f*cking human being most of the time.
I’m also lucky that since the anecdote I’ve just related, I have eventually been able to live openly and honestly and lovingly with my family. Finally after six years of back and forth, they have finally understood and accepted the industry how I see and feel it. It’s not an easy road, and many sex workers never attempt nor realise it.
The language surrounding sex workers often becomes markers of our self worth in a world in which, well, the rest of the universe associates with a social stigma only attributed to terrorists, pedophiles, illegal immigrants and murderers.
Use the aforementioned language and the world of richness we foster becomes reduced to something cheap. We don’t fight, kill, or provide services to those that impede on our safety, values and mental and psychical boundaries. We give pleasure for a living.
No element of the sex industry deserves that language (although granted I will own, accept and play on it for humour). But where does it originate from?
The greatest discrimination I see which causes the most angst and upset amongst sex worker friends is the fact that we are still socially stigmatised as though we are drug dealers, drug addicts and hopeless human beings without independent thought, activity and independence.
The truth is far from the stereotype – I am none of these, although granted in my short life I may have indulged in a few. Attempting to condemn us all in a narrow minded container is like getting a rainbow and describing it as one colour – you hopelessly become stagnant in a description which cannot encapsulate the beauty of what exists.
I’ll give you my explanation that I use when conversing with people I barely know about the sex industry.
The “sex industry” as it exists in most people’s minds is what I call a “socio-economic” facet of the industry.
What I mean by this is that the sex workers people envision have entered for reasons related to poverty, drugs, force, violence, mental illness and social circumstance.
As such this media perpetuated ideology permeates the policy making, social consciousness and inter-personal relationships that affect all sex workers, whether this is the case or not.
Think about the laws that are enforced and created in the states and countries you live in. They are there to protect – and those forced into sex work in it’s myriad of forms via these channels probably aren’t there because they chose it without extenuating circumstances. They don’t feel the joy I do, nor do they have the pleasure and happiness I receive from my profession.
They are there and waiting to bail. When their financial circumstances improve, their drug addiction is beaten, their mental and physical manipulators are removed, or the pathway out of a never-ending cycle that social class enslaves on them is removed – they are out of this industry faster than superman on a rescue mission.
But does social stigma and legislation aimed at protecting these people, which also restricts, criminalises and isolates those doing it out of choice, independence and love, really help them?
Not really. Mental health funding does. As does community engagement and involvement. Targeted, driven and harm minimisation policies remove more drug users from streets than criminalisation. Domestic shelters, work placement and access to employment, counseling assists more women and men than the laws targeted at protecting them.
Sex workers’ rights.
The point of my honesty and the countless work of sex workers all over the world fighting this same point are to raise awareness that there are two types of prostitution. Your language falsely pigeonholes both in a box in which both don’t belong.
Firstly, the previously discussed “socioeconomic” sex work, and the work done by the majority which is a conscious, positive choice we make intelligently whilst removing all socioeconomic factors. What people don’t realise is that this is actually the majority of the industry.
There is an amazing depth to what I do, and I will fight tooth and nail, even at the sacrifice of my personal identity to dispel these stereotypes.
In the interim I am still running an uphill battle. Why? Because this social stigma silences a majority of the beautiful voices I hear in regards to the sex industry. I am fortunate that I can maintain a constant personality and “soul voice” between my friends and family, and I am incredibly blessed for it.
Next time sex work comes up in discussion, use myself, use us all as an example of what does exist, what truly should be battled. Take a check of your language, if you object to the objectification and don’t know what this work entails, curtail your viewpoint.
If you are fighting sex trafficking, the apparent drug affected streetwalkers or those driven by mental illness, histories of abuse and needless self-respect then please challenge your state and country’s policies regarding mental health, housing, drugs and community support.
You’ll stop the cause, not the symptom. Then at least I, with the majority of other workers can continue to do our work safely, healthily and professionally by bringing pleasure to the masses without discrimination.
Grace Bellavue is an Australian escort passionate about industry advocacy who used to be a digital monkey chained at a desk. Unchained, she know spends too much time indulging in unmentionable sexual acts, scotch & relishing owning her own business. Find her website here (NSFW) and her Twitter here.
Comments
103 Comments so far
Pingback: Would I want my daughters to be hookers? No, but that doesn’t mean I hate prostitutes. I wouldn’t want them to be lawyers, either. « judgybitch
How on earth would you expect parents to react to the news their daughter is working as a child prostitute? For a teenager to enter such an industry at that age for starters just speaks to some serious issues going on. Grace, could you imagine having a daughter one day – would you honestly imagine cheering her on to enter this industry?
I’m sorry but this piece of writing is just filled with self-delusion and justification. Very sad!
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And the comments about STDs of sex workers are just abominable. Do you not think sex workers protect their bodies like the assets they are? Do you know what the condom usage rate amongst sex workers is compared to the general population? About 98% compared to barely 20% of the general population. And sex workers are heavily medicalised – forced to take MONTHLY health checks, as though they don’t have the autonomy to protect their own bodies – because of course, it isn’t about protecting them, it’s about protecting *society* from them. That’s stigma, and it’s dirty and demeaning. More so than the work is, for many.
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In my personal life I know a certain prostitute who is also a drug addict. To pay off drug debts and to buy more drugs, she prostitutes herself. You really think she’s the one calling the shots on whether customers wear condoms, or the sex acts they do? She also got pregnant from her job, and subsequently had a miscarriage.
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Your single anecdote of course completely defeats all first-hand accounts which say different….
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According to her website, Grace has unprotected oral sex with clients, and if her reviews are to be believed, also participates in unprotected anal sex followed by oral sex (see the review posted for July 2012 under ‘What they’re saying’). How is this protecting her health, and the health of her clients
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This is the truth. Sex workers have the lowest rates of STI in any adult group.
The odd anecdote about a streetwalker prostituting herself to pay for a drug addiction doesn’t speak for the whole industry (I doubt she would be a registered sex worker, btw) and really it says more about people who AREN’T sex workers and their lax standards for protection.
How many women or men have used a condom in every single one of their sexual encounters – intercourse, oral and anal? Being in a monogamous relationship does not protect you against contracting an STI. It only takes one time!
It is illegal for sex workers to work knowing they have an STI. They can be prosecuted.
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We have to acknowledge prostitution IS a real job whether you like it or not, with real people who deserve proper rights. We cannot deny and refuse them their rights simply because we are too ignorant.
People can argue “having sex for money is shameful, disgraceful” etc, but maybe those people should understand – there are girls living in extreme conditions, who are helpless and hopeless.
Then there are girls whose happily and willingly enter the sex industry. Yes, I would never chose to work in the sex industry, and would be honestly disappointed if my daughter did without a legitimate reason. But it is their personal choice, and who are we in this world of prejudice and intolerance and bigotry to frown upon them, and worse yet deny them safety and fairness in their workplace?
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If this is supposed to be an honest account of Grace’s experiences as a prostitute, how is it possible she left out being attacked and almost raped by a john over a debt?
She wrote a piece on it that was published here just two months ago. Surely that was worth a mention- that violence and the threat of being sexually assaulted are very much a part of prostitution? Or would that have taken away from her glowing report on the sex industry?
http://www.mamamia.com.au/health-wellbeing/sex-workers-rights-is-this-part-of-the-job/
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So what? It could happen to a anyone. I’ve been physically threatened in my lineof work as a journo – are you going to protect women from being journalists?
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Sorry there other many other causes in the world I would much rather support. Why should we push the selling of sex to be legalised? When same sex marriages are not legalised? Seriously prostitution is a choice. This topic is ridiculous.
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Yes of course it should be legalised! Prostitution is a job, if they are assaulted at work or something happened that would normally need to be reported well usually they don’t have that option. Everyone else does, why shouldn’t they? Also marriage is a choice too, so I don’t understand the point you’re trying to make sandwiching in same sex marriage into your comment.
I think it’s really a shame people are missing the point of this article, as usual whenever prostitution is brought up. It’s always about how it brutally affects women blah blah blah. It’s estimated a 1/4 of prostitutes in Australia are male, what about them? Hmm.
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Does anyone really believe this to be an accurate portrayal of the prostitution industry? I know I don’t and never will. It even comes with the token glamorous image. I feel it’s very irresponsible to glamourise this job, another naive 17 year old might be reading this and think that this is what it’s really like, when in reality in most cases, it couldn’t be further from the truth.
I feel for Grace’s parents, there are few things worse than my daughter becoming a prostitute. I would feel like the biggest failure in this world. I am truly devastated for her parents.
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Wow ‘Jess’, I’m not a prostitute (work 75 hours a week in two jobs and earn about half as much) and don’t neccessarily agree with everything in this post, although none of it really offended me (except that I think she could have beena lot more gently and mroe considerate of her parents feelings in the way she ‘came out’as a prostitute to them), but to say ‘There are few things worse than my daughter becoming a prostitute’ is just awful! What about if she was raped?Or attacked? Or suffered from some sort of injury or illness? WHat if she became a drug addict? Or an abusive or neglectfull mother? Or a bully? Or a racist?
Prostitution (in the ‘safe and regulated’ job sense described in this article) is just a job, it’s not who you are.
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While I don’t necessarily think it would be the worst thing in the world my child could do, it’s still not what I would want for them. I knew a few sex workers in my younger years and no matter where they were on the scale (streetwalker to escort) there was some mental toll. I’m sure there are those that are comfortable with their choice, but I don’t think most would choose it first.
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‘What about if she was raped?Or attacked? Or suffered from some sort of injury or illness? WHat if she became a drug addict? Or an abusive or neglectfull mother? Or a bully? Or a racist?’
Sophie, a lot of the ‘worse’ things that made it onto your list are often part of the life of a prostituted woman. Being raped, attacked, STIs, addiction. That is the reality for many women.
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oh rubbish, none of those things are any more likely for a prostitute than anyone else of course there is a HUGE difference between someone who chooses the job and someone who has been forced into it say through sex trafficking etc but that is a whole other topic.
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Oh wow nessa – Whether or not you think prostitution should be legal, it’s a known fact proven again and again by studies and polls that prostituted women have a far, far greater rate of sexual and physical violence – as well has a higher and younger mortality rate – than non-prostituted women. Just do some googling – WHO, CATW – there are many organisations that can give you many detailed studies.
Anon (and Jess), I completely agree with you.
I don’t want to support or legitimise an industry that makes money off degrading and dehumanising humans. It’s not “empowering women through their sexuality”, it’s making women rapable for a fee. I don’t want to be in a society that legitimises that.
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Look I would totally agree that in some sectors of prostitution that this would be true but what we are talking about is women that choose to work in legal brothels as I said there is a world of difference between women that CHOOSE to work in the industry and women that are pushed into it or who work in it because they feel they don’t have any other choice. It needs to be legalised in all states so that the illegal brothels can be shut down and the women that may of been forced into prostitution protected. Irrespective of how any individual person views prostitution there are plenty of women who choose it because it suits them and they enjoy it and there is plenty of money to be made. Regardless of it being legal or illegal it is the worlds oldest profession and will always continue to exist because there will always be a demand.
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graces experience of her parents reactions sounds remarkably similar to my parents reaction to me being a lesbian.
after over a year they still find it hard to swallow. If I were writing the same piece it would seethe heartache for my loss of them.
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“And for the record, no one in my private life knows what I do. Not my boyfriend, not my parents, not anyone….. I don’t feel its anyone’s business but my own. It is, afterall, MY body and MY mind.”
I have a couple of questions about this paragraph, I am genuinely interested in your answers if you wanted to elaborate further -
1) How do you maintain the fiction without getting completely exhausted by it? A great income working only 2 nights a week would raise the odd question surely?
2) I don’t know any person who doesn’t derive some of thier identity from what they do. How do you reconcile this in your home life and the fact that people who pay you to have sex with them know more about the real you than those who are apparently closest to you?
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1) I’m very lucky in that my partner is very trusting and he believes I work in the adult entertainment industry (not “sex” industry.) He also knows no different as I was doing this well before I met him. If I make over a certain amount that seems realistic I just put the money away somewhere.
2) During the week I appear to the outside world as a pampered “housewife”. I stay at home with my daughter throughout the week and we partake in normal suburban activities. Then on the weekends I go to work. I get to engage in a fantasy and become whoever I want to be. (A struggling university student, a sexually liberated nympho, a single girl who loves sex and shopping, whatever I feel the client wants to hear.) It can be a lot of fun. My regular clients barely know about my life at home. I like to ask them lots of questions because believe it or not I find many of them very interesting. We also spend the majority of our time talking joking around and chatting about our interests (sport, usually.) What I do find hard is being around people in my real life and having to omit so much. It’s very hard coming home and not being able to share a funny story about work or discuss something that bothered you, or something interesting you discovered. So really it’s just best to leave it at the door.
The flexibility of this line of work is fantastic for someone who has a child. Especially if that child has a bad day and decides she needs you or gets sick. I can simply call and say “sorry, can’t come in tonight!” with no repercussions whatsoever. This line of work IS empowering in the sense that I can work when I want, see who I want, make the money I want, come and go as I please. Unlike say working in a call centre for example where even toilet breaks are monitored. I also enjoy the fact I didn’t have to study for 4 years and work my way up the corporate ladder in order to make the money I make.
Sexual slavery, human sex trafficking, etc DOES exist (mostly in illegal unregulated suburban brothels with a large amount of foreigners) but in the legit sex industry there is a lot of freedom to be had and indulge in! We wouldn’t be doing it otherwise.
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… you are outright deceiving your “very trusting partner”.
I am sad for him. He should be with someone of equal integrity – who is honest. He either takes you as you are or not at all. And if you are so ok with what you do, why do you feel the need to llve a lie?
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Couldn’t agree more and there is so much more I could say but would probably be kicked out of the dinner party.
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Yes, I am. And I don’t deny this. But he has different views to this line of work than I do and I was doing it well before I met him. I just don’t see how it affects him I guess. Sorry.
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good on you Natalie. I don’t know how you have the patience with people who are so desperately caught up in how other people live their lives. Seriously, there is so much more in the world to harp on about than this.
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There’s really no difference between you and your johns who are cheating on their wives. You’re all liars.
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I feel really sad for your partner…if you are OK with what you do, why do you hide it from him? That’s the ultimate in betrayal. Not sure how you can so comfortably live a lie?
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Thanks “Natalie” for clarifying. Whilst my initial reaction to your first post was similar to those below, I realised that I am coming from working 20 years, 50 hours a week, for half the money you make – as an accountant so your world is completely foreign to me. Funnily enough, the thing I enjoy most about my job is chatting to clients and finding more out about them too. Weird how we have that in common.
Whilst I envy your lifestyle, I recognise that it is definitely not for me – the subterfuge would do my head in. – That is no reason why it cannot be right for someone else . There is a need in the world for someone to do your job, just as there is a need for someone to do mine (mind you, I have never done a sex workers tax return, do they really pay tax?).
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Some girls pay tax. It depends what their financial goals are. For those who put their money into buying a house or investment properties then it is a must!!
We mostly just use the accountants we know who specialise in that sort of thing. It’s a bit tricky and fiddly. Be glad you’re not doing their tax! LOL.
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I have to say as a mother to a daughter, I have some sympathy for your parents. I propably wouldn’t have used the same language. But I would feel I had failed in all of my parenting aims & duties if my seventeen year old was working ( illegally) in a brothel. I would have moved heaven & earth to have the place shut down & the owner & manager in jail, for child prostitution offences. I have seen first hand the other side of your tale, the vulnerable, the addicted the mentally ill,and women & girls who have been trafficked into this country i have seen the grief of parents of a seventeen year old girl who died of a drug overdose whilst working in a licenced suburban brothel and I can tell you it is not an environment or life I would ever choose for someone I loved. With respect You are not the majority. I believe that sex workers ( like everyone else) are entitled to safe working conditions, and the full protection of the law, but I can’t accept that selling your body is what we should want for our daughters, that their worth is only found in their sexual appeal to men, then price their worth by the hour for men’s sexual pleasure.
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Another thing to add: A prostitute is not a prostitute is a prostitute. Just as women we are all different, all into different things, find different things a turn on, some working girls have different degrees of … what they would allow than others.
For example: A 17 year old becoming a prostitute? Horrifying to me. As is coming across a prostitute who openly offers “natural oral” to clients. That is “oral without a condom”. Especially since gonorrhea can be harboured in the back of the throat and transmitted to the penis – and vice versa.
Just something to think about …
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your choices, your business, it clearly is not to everyone’s taste but i applaud you for standing up for what you believe in.
and for the record, all your website made me think was ‘damn, she was in town a few months ago…’ !
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Look, I don’t really know how to start this so i’ll just begin by saying I too am a prostitute.
This is not a happy hooker story nor is it a tale of woe, this is just my story.
I work in one of Melbourne’s most expensive, well managed brothels. I never thought I could do what I do but once I started I discovered just how much I loved it.
My nights include getting to dress up and look amazing, getting to meet a variety of men many whom are quite interesting, funny, incredibly goodlooking, sexy, rich and some who are seedy, scary, ugly, dirty, poor. The thing that a lot of people don’t realise is we get to choose our clients. We get to choose who we have sex with for money. Some girls like myself arent all that concerned with making huge wads of cash. We’re happy to go home with merely $750-$1250 a weekend night snickering with the knowledge we had sex with 2, 3 or 4 awesome men we would have happily bonked for free if we’d met them in a bar.
Some girls don’t care. A penis is a penis, a man is a man. They have different standards, different taste, different financial and life goals. Some girls want to get in and out as quick as possible. The bottom line is: THEY get to decide.
A brothel, in my experience, is just like any other workplace. You have the girls whose parents are still blissfully together, from a middle income private school background, you have the girls who grew up on struggle street with a single parent, you have the girls who are happily married with kids, the girls who are single and hoping to meet mr right and settle down one day, you have the girls recovering or in full throws of a drug addiction but seem to manage it, the girls who wouldn’t touch drugs if their life dependent on it. You get all types. It’s impossible to pigeonhole.
What all these girls have in common though is they like money. They enjoy making a lot of cash quickly. They enjoy the thrill of the opportunity of making $2.5K in a night for very little effort. Some of it gets squandered. Some of it gets declared, goes through an accountant, a financial planner and can set the girl up for life.
I myself have a beautiful boyfriend, a gorgeous daughter, I work only one or two nights a week and once I hit my $2K target I am happy. I have great regular clients at the moment – most of whom work in finance and business and don’t have much free time to pursue a relationship or social life at the present.
I’m lucky. I have my shit together. I’m satisfied and happy with myself that I took the risk to do something many people in society look down upon instead of droning away in a middling average wage paying job somewhere unsatisfying that I would hate almost every moment of 5 days a week.
For all the people who gasp in horror that a woman can have sex with a strange man and receive money as compensation for her time and effort well, what I have to say to you is: the only difference between you and me is that you fuck him happily for free because you’re married to him/with him, I do it only because I get paid to do it.
Don’t think for a second your husbands and boyfriends haven’t at the very least dabbled at some point. We get our clients from somewhere, you know.
And for the record, no one in my private life knows what I do. Not my boyfriend, not my parents, not anyone. And so long as I am safe (always safe! Sex workers are safer than any other group in the community) I don’t feel its anyone’s business but my own. It is, afterall, MY body and MY mind.
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I think your voice is a bit more realistic then Graces. Thank you
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I agree with amandarose, thank you for a balanced portrayal.
I don’t understand why men wanting to have sex, or women willing to have sex with them for (quite a lot of) money is so morally wrong.
Sex is a basic driver of human existence – denying that is fighting a lot of very basic biological urges. Besides that, consensual sex hurts nobody and gives people pleasure (as long as there’s no lying involved, which is the one choice of your I wouldn’t make for myself). Seriously, I wish people would get out of other people’s pants! Same issue as abortion, same as gay marriage. What people do with their own bodies is not anyone else’s business.
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Thanks for your story. The only bit that bugs me is the “don’t think your husband hasn’t dabbled bit”. With respect, you only are meeting men who are dabbling, so you can’t speak for the population. One of my best friends is a man, who does use prostitutes occassionally, and I know that within his circle of friends at least, he is in the minority. Some men just cant get there head around it, or are too shy or whatever. Personally I couldn’t care one way of the other, but men are as diverse as we are, so please don’t generalise.
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“what I have to say to you is: the only difference between you and me is that you fuck him happily for free because you’re married to him/with him, I do it only because I get paid to do it.”
Oh this is where you have it totally wrong, that’s so not the only differene between you and me, believe me.
Also, I don’t like you speaking on behalf of everyone else’s husband, you can only speak on behalf of those you’ve met in your line of work i.e. the ones who see prostitutes. Just because the only married men you meet are the ones who visit prostitutes doesn’t lead to the conclusion that every married man does it.
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What is also different between us is that I don’t have to (or feel I have to) hide a significant part of my life-work from my husband. If you’re that happy with your life, open up to your partner about it.
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And ruin everything I have that’s wonderful in my life? For what? No thank you. Do you think he’s been 100% honest about everything in his life with me? Doubtful.
The difference between men and women is that women feel the need to be honest about everything aaaaall the time. Not only do they feel the need to be honest they get upset when people aren’t 100% supportive of their choices.
Men do what they want to do and keep their mouths shut. They’re smart. They don’t try to seek others approval all the time.
(Yes I’m generalising but you get what I’m getting at.)
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I support a legal industry. I understand some women enjoy their work. However I sigh at yet another pro industry piece from this kind of voice. Educated middle class drug free women dominate the current sex industry discourse yet make up a minority of the industry. You are not the majority, not by a long shot. I say that having studied the industry.
Your evidence is most likely anecdotal – we surround ourselves with like minded people. I don’t see you working alongside a sex slave. There are two kinds of prostituion and one is minor. Yours. In many states such as nsw and vic you can easily practice your kind of work so I am not sure why criminalisation bothers as it only criminalises certain unsafe aspects.
It’s true we need to fight the causes and no one disagrees there so this is about stigma. Stigma does protect the majority vulnerable women as it makes women think twice before entering an industry the eats the vulnerable. It inhibits the recruitment efforts by pimps and slavers. We need more policing of the illegal industry and assistance of causes not less stigma. Stigma keeps the numbers down a fact that balances the fear of coming forward due to stigma.
If that means the minority privileged have to be discreet and trust their loved ones will still love them despite their work too bad. You are ultimately asking for social acceptance for yourself that would devastate the majority who can’t write so well or who have no voice at all.
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Grace is a smart lady, seriously.
She makes a good point in saying there is a distinct difference between those who are getting into an industry while being mentally unstable (drugs, abuse etc.) and those who are sex workers by choice. I can’t believe there are still people who post comments on here about the how horrendous sex work is. If someone is doing work by choice and they are happy with that choice, it’s actually no different than working in your chosen career. If someone is doing sex work to fill the gaps but all the while being mentally unstable- of course it will be a horrendous experience.
But as a consenting adult you must take responsibility for your body, it’s yours and once one learns to accept it the better your sexual experiences will be.
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I posted a quoted from Grace’s website earlier and raised a very significant OH&S issue related to her activities. My post was not published. I only came across this site today – it looks like it might contain some useful information and commentary, but the promotion of women like Grace as representative of the majority of sex workers is inaccurate, and perniciously so.
How about a warts and all discussion of the sex industry rather than a piece of cliched pap, complete with a romantic, stylised image of the author?
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Some readers might be interested to read a different viewpoint from a former prostituted woman. Be warned- it is graphic.
“I hate to know and say that being raped just by a penis in the vagina was a relief, if that was all a punter wanted. It was almost nothing.
No, the prostituted are drown, are strung from the ceiling, are penetrated in every hole in their body including ones too small, are burnt, are thrown out of moving cars, are sexually tortured for many days and nights.
That is just a tip of the hell we have known.
Look deep into the normal output of hard-core porn and know that every inhumane act you see there is put into the living bodies and minds of the prostituted in every city, every small town, every continent and every culture that considered prostitution as a normal outlet for men.
Torture is having your head push into bath water as you are made to kneel as the punter anally rapes you.
Torture is having a punter in the room for an all-nighter as he rapes every cell of your body, as he rubs his sperm all over you as punishment, as he put a pillow on your head a fist into your vagina and a cock in your mouth.
Torture is having a group of punters standing round watching, each taking turns – till you lose track of time or who is doing what.
Torture is being forced into a wall with legs together and a cock going so hard and fast into your anus that your heart stops.
Torture is being kept as a sex slave in his flat for weeks, and getting raped if you signs of being tired or not enthusiastic.
Torture is being read passages from de Sade, Lolita, and from sex-murders and knowing as the punters fucks you till are alive by the skin of your teeth.
All that was my norm.”
http://rmott62.wordpress.com
This is just one of many women’s stories I have come across.
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wow.
that is much more in-line with my understanding of the sex industry.
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That is a truly horrific story but again it is an entirely different scenario than someone who chooses the profession and works in a safe and legal brothel.
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I think no money is worth being exploited and used by dirty men who can’t hold a relationship… that is why they go to a prostitute, isn’t is? I really question how happy you really are when you go home at night. And I hope you never want to have a respectful husband because what man could get past the fact you have been with sooo many men? And children? How would they feel about knowing what you do for a living?
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It’s really the men being exploited. She isn’t being used, she is making a living, a good good living. And being the smart, sassy, down to earth person she is, any man would be lucky to have her as a wife. I see no reason for being an escort to impact on other parts of life. It’s just a job.
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Oh, absolutely! Those willing, paying men are so being exploited.
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“any man would be lucky to have her as a wife.”
Oh you’ve got to be joking, right? You really need to speak for yourself.
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oh for crying out loud!! ‘dirty men who can’t hold a relationship’?? that is a huge generalisation isn’t it and no thats not actually the reason most men see sex workers, there are many different and varied reasons, and as has been stated earlier the majority of prostitutes that work in legal brothels can pick and choose which clients they see or don’t see.
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Wow…. you sound… just… awful. You are aware that you come across as bigoted? I don’t like that word being used as a way to silence opinion, but seriously? You live in a world where men can’t deal with being with a woman who’s slept with a lot of men? As a sex worker who has had partners who encouraged me to express myself sexually and who loved that I was open-minded and willing to experience my desire rather than repress it in favour of preserving outdated, misogynistic ideals, I actually feel sorry for you that the men you’ve encountered are so small-minded that you think your opinion reflects reality.
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Well…..as the priest remarked, “Thank God ! For a moment I thought that you said that you are a protestant” !
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I thought she was going to say she’s a lawyer. At least she’s earning an honest living.
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Thank you Grace and MM for allowing me the opportunity to read such an intriguing and well written article!
I’m truly fascinated by the sex industry and would love to read more of Grace’s words, either here at MM or on her sensational website.
I appreciate the diversity that MM keeps delivering, please keep it coming!
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Grace, I applaud you for your stance and your voice. I fully support anyone being able to do whatever they like with their body and their lives. But honestly, if my daughter ever went into the sex industry, my heart would break.
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If your daughter went into the sex industry, you would do everything you can to make sure she is safe while doing so, or you are not her mother.
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I’m generally suspicious of this happy hooker stuff as I think most of it is written by men or female brothel owners to encourage blokes to think it’s OK to exploit vulnerable women. But I have enough respect for this site to think that they wouldn’t actually make stuff up so let’s assume it’s true and this is someone who is not a victim of sexual abuse and enjoys paid sex with many random blokes over the course of the week.
This no more proves that prostitution is good for prostitutes than my account of my great uncle Bert who smoked four packs a day and lived to be 100 shows the health benefits of smoking but I somehow suspect I’m not going to get much interest in publishing that piece.
The reality for most prostitutes is very different and I think you owe it to your readers to publish a few accounts from the other side. How about an Asian girl tricked into coming here for a waitressing job and now doing 20 punters a day just to pay off the debt to her pimp? Or a street worker in St Kilda supporting her habit and a violent pimp who beats her if she doesn’t bring in enough cash?
I always thought the most irresponsible articles in Cosmo etc were the ones glamourising prostitution. I know one girl who claimed she got started because she’d read how good it would be (it goes without saying it wasn’t for her) and I doubt this is the only case. While I appreciate that Mamamia’s audience as a group are older, wiser and better educated than Cosmo readers I still think a glimpse of the other side of this occupation would not go amiss.
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I wish I could ‘like’ this comment from my mobile. Well said.
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Agreed with all of this. Completely.
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As much as I’m sure this won’t be believed, as someone who has worked (and still does a bit) in the sex industry (and is a woman), this just isn’t true. It may be true in a lot of cases, but it’s quite upsetting to be told by people that you can’t possibly be happy, or must be a man spouting propaganda, when you’re genuinely a woman who enjoys her work. I was a stripper and personally I don’t think prostitution would be for me, but I know several women who do this and enjoy it. Like everyone, they have days when they don’t love their work, but it’s not horrific exploitation, just more ‘that person was annoying today’, like I have now in my office job. It may be true that even most people are unhappy in the sex industry, but don’t tar everyone with the same brush. It may be a minority, but some women do this and love it.
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“Mamamia’s audience as a group are older, wiser and better educated than Cosmo readers” …. interesting statement.
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Why do people have to justify to you whether they like their job? Would you go around asking women in any other profession whether they deep down enjoyed it every single minute of every day? No. Why do it with sex work?
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Oh dear, that was embarrassing. Wish I’d known what NSFW meant before I clicked the link!
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Yeah, not one to be clicking on if you’re at work!
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in principle i get it and i definitely stick up for sex workers when ever i get the chance to…. but anonymously i feel that it is really sad…. i would be completely devastated if you were my child…. and coming to this decision as an adult would be somewhat easier to accept than doing this as a child… that is also really devastating…. i can’t imagine how hard that was for your parents.
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My friends mother was a prostitute. Until we were about 15 we thought she was a nurse.
When the truth came out it was truly awful. My friend never accepted it and moved out of home at 16.
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This article documents a historical crime. The prostitution of a person under the age of 18 years is a crime in all Australian jurisdictions. While the victim may not wish to report the crime, this post nonetheless documents evidence of child prostitution occurring in Australia. The rhetorical framing of crime as ‘work’ or a social welfare service is both unethical and unjustifiable in this article.
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What’s worse, there are men who could have committed a crime because this person lied to them.
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“there are men who could have committed a crime because this person lied to them”? No, that is not “worse” – even if that is what happened.
Imagine that this article was written by a young man who explains his behaviour by telling his parents, “Mum. Dad. I’m a pimp. I sell girls to other men to f•ck and to f*ck over….
And now I’m going to prison because I didn’t ask the age of one of these girls.”
Really, is there any doubt what the crime is here? Or who committed it? And as carolinenorma says, the attempt to justify the prostitution of this woman (who mistakenly calls her “a prostitute”) by men is ethically bankrupt.
The worse crime is selling women.
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I think she meant the men who hired the seventeen year old prostitute.
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I understand where your parents were coming from.
I have yet to hear of a mother looking lovingly down at the face of their newborn daughter and say, ‘when she grows up, I hope she becomes a prostitute’.
I understand that you can justify your actions or your career, but the fact is that few parents would wish this lifestyle onto someone they love dearly.
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well I’ve yet to hear of a mother who wanted her daughter to grow up to be a shop assistant or a street cleaner but that doesn’t mean they aren’t fine jobs. And personally, my mother has always said she’d be rather pleased if I wrote for an erotic magazine… I think she’d find the idea of stripping interesting if it were someone else, and the only reason I wouldn’t tell her is the same reason I wouldn’t tell her all the things I do with my boyfriend. Not because she’s opposed to the idea of either, but because it’s a bit TMI!
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Errr, shop assistant, cleaner and writer are all decent jobs when compared to prostitution. Your mothers wouldn’t be changing the subject when asked ‘so what does your daughter do now’. Maybe not what they envisioned but still respectable. Prostitution, however, is not respectable, no matter how much people try to justify it.
Sex workers degrade themselves and other women and put themselves at risk. Never heard of a salesgirl contracting a STD on the job or being brutalised sexually at work.
Have you heard of the street cleaner that was so ashamed of their job that they couldn’t tell anyone, not even their family or partner? Because, you know street cleaning is morally wrong and deep down they know this. Nah, I didn’t think so.
Erotic writers write fiction (not real at all), sex workers experience the hardcore stuff in real life for a few bucks. The two occupations are on opposite ends on the sex worker spectrum.
Surely one’s dignity is worth more than the money.
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The notion that sex work is simply not respectable, end of story, no discussion will be entered into, no mind will be open to that possibility, is the whole point here. Why? Why is is not respectable? Why is it stigmatised?
That’s right: street cleaners and shop assistants and sewage workers and whatever else are not ashamed because there is relatively little stigma. Although, if you put a shop assistant in a room of merchant bankers, watch the sneers fly thick and fast behind his/her back.
“Never heard of a salesgirl contracting a STD on the job…”
Sex between senior and junior employees is common in the workplace, and of course STDs are transmitted. As has been mentioned elsewhere in this discussion, STD rates among sex workers are lower than in the general population, according to published medical research.
“Never heard of a salesgirl … being brutalised sexually at work.”
Rape and sexual assault of employees by other employees? Never heard of sexual harassment in the work place? Never heard of Brodie Panlock, who committed suicide (after already trying once), because of relentless sexually-based bullying at the Hawthorn cafe where she was a waitress?
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Context, people, context.
In the everyday role and responsibilities of a sales attendent (i.e. selling goods over a counter or in a store), STDs or rape are not an issue. It is not a risk you take each and everyday selling a pair of shoes or a frock.
Of course, any workplace relations or harrassment can result in STD or rape, but that was not the point here. I am talking about the normal course of the workday.
Context – don’t take things out of it.
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Yes, context. Let’s try some. For instance: sales assistant and sex worker are not the only two jobs in the world.
And sex work is certainly not the only job with risks of disease or violence. Needle stick injuries which transmit STDs among others are a risk for everyone in a hospital. From cleaner to kitchen-hand to nurse to surgeon and even a psychologist – hospitals are dangerous places where everyone is at risk of contracting diseases that sex workers are unlikely to ever encounter. And nurses are required to deal with pus, vomit, urine, faeces, sputum, semen, bile… all sorts of things far nastier than most sex workers will ever see. Nurses also risk violent assault daily, including sexual assault, especially in Emergency and lock-down Psych wards.
How about firefighters? They risk being burned alive in ‘the normal course of the workday’. Police risk being shot, knifed, beaten, tortured. Members of the armed forces risk stepping on landmines. Many rural workers risk mutilation by machinery. Dock workers risk being crushed to death by containers. Did you know librarians risk long-term bronchial damage from a dust-mite that favours old paper?
Different jobs have different risks. Why should that make one job stigmatised?
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People change the subject or hide what they do because other people are too closed-minded to deal with it. That doesn’t mean they’re inherently ashamed of it. Personally, most people I know know what I do/did, because they’re open minded people who think it’s interesting. If I were friends with people who couldn’t think for themselves or had bizarre pseudo-moral opinions about sex, well, I’d get new friends, but I would hide it from those people because they are prejudiced, not because I’d be ashamed. Plenty of people are sexually assaulted in the workplace, people get sick at work from other people’s germs. What’s the difference between chlamydia and the flu? both clear up with medication? Sex workers who take care of themselves are no more likely to become ill from their work than anyone else. And as a webcam stripper, I was actually at no risk of contracting diseases, being attacked or harrassed or touched or anything, whereas I was sexually assaulted twice at university and once by someone when I worked in an office job. I doubt your problem is really with the risks, but with the perceived moral issues. Just because you’d be ashamed to tell people your daughter was working in the sex industry, doesn’t imply that the work is inherently shameful.
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You’re comparing being a prostitute to being a shop assistant. REALLY?
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Um Hannah?? Perhaps you should have reread your comment before hitting that “Save” button. Prostitution is so far removed from Shop Assistant and Cleaners. And writing for an erotic magazine is completely different from actually sleeping with men for money.
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I’m well aware of what my comment said. Yes I’m comparing the two, and not by mistake. Please don’t patronise me. In what way is it so far removed? People sell services, that’s what most jobs are. I don’t see a difference. When people describe the difference, they just go ‘SEX BUT IT’S SEX’ like that explains it. If someone can present me with a well-thought-through philosophical basis for dividing different types of work the way people do, I’ll accept it, but I’m yet to see it. I know writing for an erotic magazine is different, but I use it as an example because it’s the kind of attitude that makes me think my mother wouldn’t be bothered about my being a stripper. I know she’s heard of other people doing it and thought it’s fine, too. Prostitution would be icky to talk about with my parents for the same reason talking about sex at all would be, not for any reason other than that. I wouldn’t want to sleep with men for money because sex often makes me sore for a bit so I probably couldn’t have sex that many times a day, and I’d find the social side hard, not because I see at through some archaic framework where SEX is a whole different category of action that requires some sacred barrier of shame around it.
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I don’t know. I don’t understand how a woman could feel empowered or driven to let multiple strange men have sex with her and give her some cash.
It is well and good for some people to rationalise it by saying prostitution is like a one night stand, except you are getting paid for it, but they are very different things. There is something very, very hollow about letting men you have no emotional or mutual connection with, to visit you in a building, get his satisfaction from your body, then leave.
I don’t think there will ever be a time when prostitution has no negative stigma attached to it. The whole concept makes men out to be over-sexual beings who need to purchase their physical satisfaction by using female’s bodies, like their sex drives need to be quenched. Yet there are many males who do not need to resort to this, for many reasons, most being moral.
This is all just my opinion, so I know there will be many others who think I have the wrong idea, that I am looking at it too judgementally etc etc. But it really is quite simple. Prostitutes are being used primarily for their vaginas, breasts, other body parts which physically stimulate men. I would like to think that most women in our society are alot prouder than to let themselves be used in this way.
It just doesn’t seem very gender-equality based to me. Like someone else said below, I just don’t see how women will be respected by men while prostitution is still a line of work.
It makes me very sad thinking about the individual girls who do this for work. Surely they cannot be totally at ease with themselves unless it becomes routine and the negative stigma / emotions begin to be de-sensitized. I cannot understand how having sex, such an intimate, emotional, attatching act of our humanity, can be hollowed out to make money from strangers.
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It takes two to tango. This sounds like you’re perpetuating a double standard. The man are parttaking in the act, too, only they’re handing over money. I have worked, and never felt less of a person.
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I agree 100%.
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I have to say I feel for you mother. I would be very upset if my daughter was illegally working for a brothel underage. Who wouldn’t hope their children chose safe careers and live a for filling life. You have mentioned an near rape on here previously and that is why I get your mothers concerns.
I think it is a bit disingenuous to claim you do it for love of the profession and not money- I have seen how much you charge and good on you I say for earning a decent living but seriously is not a altruistic career choice.
I think sex workers have a place in society and offer a useful service. But I wouldn’t want my daughter doing it just like i wouldn’t want my son to be a soldier. Both legitimate careers but inheridently dangerous .
I also think it is a bit much claiming all prostitutes are like you. All the ones I know including my late step sister and my best friends sister had issues to put it mildly. I am kind of glad they have a legitimate means to make money- a Herroin habit as in my step sisters is expensive and it provided money to afford her and her kids some quality of life.
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You not only write extremely well but having a person of your intelligence choose pleasure/sex work as a career choice will only be a good thing for the industry.
The thing I am most curious about is why go in to it at such an early age? Sounds as if you were extremely mature and mentally strong for your age but 17 is just so young.
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Your business model is incredible – I had a look at your site (I help clients with their digital marketing), it is very well put together. It is clear to me this is a serious business you are running. In a field I had never really associated with as having a clear business strategy and implementation of that.
I also think it’s great that you’ve found an outlet for your level and type of sex drive, and you’re doing it safely – it does seem win win. As you enjoy it and get paid for it.
Certainly the whole prostitution thing does challenge me, most probably based on my ignorance & being more affected by societal opinion than I’d like to admit to myself. So I do like getting to be exposed to a different perspective to expand my own thinking. Thank you for that.
You do sound somewhat like Belle De Jour (with the addition of being more active about the industry) who has achieved world wide fame/infamy with sharing her views of the sex industry and how she approached it.
I may well be one of many voices saying to you, it would be great to read more about your life as a sex worker. Are you writing one? Or considering it?
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I don’t know. Something inside me (probably the Mummy side) says a big fat NO to sex work. I guess maybe I do still see it as something women are driven to by desperation. If that’s not the case, wonderful, but then that has me wondering why you would want to “demean” yourself in that way. Again, I guess I really see it as something a woman would not choose to do. My own prejudices and thoughts on sex I suppose. I’ve only ever had one one-night stand and it was horrendous. I’m strictly a relationships girl.
If my daughter was a sex worker, especially if she was underage, I would not make her leave the house but I would do everything I could to stop her from doing it. As an advocate for sex workers rights and protection, I do wonder if Grace now feels that the employers she first worked for were totally irresponsible in not asking for ID?
A very thought-provoking article, made me a little sad though.
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Maybe she won’t be as judgemental as you seem to be and will love her children regardless of what they do.
Just a thought.
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Grace, I respect that what you do with your body is your decision, but I take serious issue with the fact that your decisions affect other women, not just yourself. Each time you see a male client, he is treating you (the female, your body) as a commodity. A few hours later when he is at work, interacting with his young female secretary, do you think his mind can fully separate the idea of her (a female, a professional) from the idea of you (a female, a commodity)? Or will he subconsciously be wondering how much money it would take for the secretary to sleep with him, too? I just don’t think women will ever be completely respected while this line of work is an option.
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what a low opinion of men you have and what a gendered idea you have of careers… also Grace sees a lot of Women as well…
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Sarah, I used the example of a female secretary (rather than a female CEO) because I believe it is the women who hold lower status positions in the workplace who are most vulnerable to being disrespected by men and who are most seriously affected by behaviour (like prostitution) that embeds gender inequality. I absolutely do not believe that women belong only in these positions.
In response to your second point, of course I am not talking about the majority of men, but surely you can acknowledge that when men (and it is overwhelmingly men) treat women as commodities, it does not favourably affect how they value and think of women.
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Isn’t the way men treat women the responsibility of their parents and the values that they teach their children before they become men? Why should it be Grace’s responsibility?
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Parents play a crucial role, but I think that men make judgments about women based significantly on their experiences with women. Anon, you spoke of responsibility, but do the prostitutes who are not driven by desperation have the RIGHT to demean themselves and, by extension, the entire female gender just to avoid a 9-5 job, or as Grace put it, being ‘a digital monkey chained at a desk’?
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That’s a really huge leap to make Erin, into the mind of a man? Wouldn’t it be patronising if a man tried to do that about the way women think?
Why is a man going to a sex worker any different from buying any other service? Perhaps his motive is just that, buying a service. No more, no less. But to really find out, you’d have to wait until it’s less of a stigma for a man to admit and talk about such things. Which brings you right back to what Grace is trying to do.
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The crucial difference is that no other ‘service’ treats the female body and sexual identity as a commodity. No other ‘service’ incites such disrespect towards females. No other ‘service’ has such a sickening (largely gender based, as most clients are men) power imbalance embedded in it. No other ‘service’ demeans the worker and by extension, her whole gender. I’d be interested to hear what other services you think are comparable.
I acknowledge that I used an extreme example, but do you think it’s really such a ‘huge leap’ for a man’s respect for the female gender to be lowered as a result of treating females as commodities and interacting with females who are willing to be treated as commodities? I doubt there are many men who find themselves respecting women more after having ‘bought’ one.
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I do think it’sva huge leap, yes. And all services could be spun as reductive. I find it strange that people think sex work reduces a woman to just a sexual commodity, yet I’ve never had anyone worry that I’m reduced to being only the part of me which creates digital strategy now I’m in that line of work. Is a model reduced only to an aesthetic being? A lot of film stars are pretty much only sex symbols in the eye of the public, which probably does a lot more to damage the work done by feminism than prostitution does, since it’s so much more a part of most people’s lives. Are those women doing something immoral? As a masseuse I would be selling the use of my hands… What’s the difference between me using my hands to massage someone’s back or to massage someone’s penis? The idea that selling sex demeans women to me smacks of the idea that women shoulda be ashamed of sex, or shouldn’t want it, or some equally backward idea about female sexuality.
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Lucy, look into the eyes of your (hypothetical or actual) baby daughter. Would you rather her become a prostitute or a masseuse/digital strategist/film star? I’m guessing you chose the latter. Ask yourself why, if you truly believe prostitution is not reductive or demeaning.
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I don’t think there’s any doubt that most people would prefer their actual or hypothetical daughter to be a masseuse/digital strategist/film star than a sex worker.
Is that preference because of the work involved or because of the stigma from prejudiced people?
I wouldn’t tell a fundamantalist zealot about my religious beliefs, but it isn’t because I’m ashamed of them. I wouldn’t want blond child to live in some countries where Westerners are at risk, not because I’m ashamed of their blond hair but because they will be endangered and ostracised. I would advise a child against sex work because they will be stigmatised and ostracised by narrow-minded, prejudiced people, not because there’s something inherently wrong with taking money for touching other people’s genitals or allowing them to touch yours.
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What an interesting article to read.
The rational person in me fully supports a regulated (and de-stigmatised!) sex industry with fully consenting and empowered individuals. Especially love the point about addressing the reasons why street workers are on the street and not operating from a much safer environment.
The parent in me can’t help but feel sad for a seventeen year-old girl who chose that path. I am glad your family and you are on better terms now.
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I think at least part of your parents’ reaction comes from the perceived power imbalance in sex … I’m guessing they saw you as being used and abused by the clients rather than *you using *them to earn money.
Plus the fact that you followed up “I’m a prostitute” with ” I f*ck men for a living”
If that isn’t a bit of teenage defiance I don’t know what is!
But fantastic story Grace, I also hope it helps break down some barriers.
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I was a sex worker in three countries, one of which was Australia. I started at 20, not much older than Grace and had healthy, meaningful relationships throughout my time working. Sex work did not mentally damage me at all.
I completely disagree with the assertion that the majority of sex workers are drug addicts or mentally ill. Many of them have had a decent education even! What makes girls work is varied. Some are single mothers, some are putting themselves through education, some are starting up their own business, some of them hate the career they chose.. and yes, some got involved as very young girls, some found themselves completely alone with no support and some some were supporting drug habits. It’s my experience however, that many girls, including the girls with habits, quit after only a few years.
Sex work is not the end of your life. My life has continued and I now have a regular job and a long term relationship. I’m glad for Grace that she has managed to have an open and honest relationship with her family. There is nothing worse than the constant lying and deceit many girls have to endure to avoid judgement from their loved ones.
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Hi Grace,
I love reading your work and agree the stigma around workers and their clients should lift. I do however have a genuine question. Where do the stats come from about the socio-economic backgrounds. I know there are advocacy groups but do the drug affected and desperate really join in here? The reason I ask is that two of my girlfriends were exotic dancers for approx 10 years each – all around Australia – and my experience in that time was that they were in a very small minority of women coming to it without addictions, a history of abuse, mental illness, lack of education etc.
I don’t have a problem with sex work in any of it’s forms but the fear of exploiting women coming from a challenging circumstance does impact my ability to embrace it.
Thanks very much. Hope you keep sharing here
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Very good points, Jen. I think the author has misrepresented the extent of vulnerability and exploitation ingrained on a widespread basis within this industry.
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