By REBECCA SPARROW
Oh Jennifer Garner, I love you.
Yesterday the actress went on Ellen to clear up those ‘baby bump’ rumours that have been hounding her for the past few months.
Here’s how it went down according to People:
“I get congratulated all the time by people I know. This one woman who had babysat for us said, ‘Oh, my gosh! I can’t wait for No. 4,’ and I thought, ‘What is going on?’ ” Garner said. “So I asked around and apparently I have a baby bump, and I’m here to tell you that I do!”
After much applause Garner pointed out that she wasn’t actually PREGNANT.
It’s called THE SHAPE OF A WOMAN’S STOMACH AFTER SHE’S HAD THREE KIDS.
“I am not pregnant, but I have had three kids and there is a bump,” said Garner, shooting down speculation that she and husband Ben Affleck were expecting baby No. 4 after paparazzi photos over the summer showed her with a bit of a rounded tummy.
“From now on, ladies, I will have a bump, and it will be my baby bump. It’s not going anywhere,” she said. “Its name is Violet, Sam and Sera.”
Take a look:
Jennifer, I hear you sister.
Last week I made the grave error of going to a yoga class. I don’t know why. I think I was drunk. Anyway, off I went with my yoga mat and my fine self ready to downward dog my way to better flexibility and a more Zen attitude.
But things didn’t go well.
Top Comments
I'm actually considering abdominoplasty because - wait for it - I have in fact now (FINALLY AND WITH INSANE EFFORT, MY GOD BUT IT'S BEEN HELL) lost 99% of my baby weight and imagine my horror when I realised that my poor, 3 x stretched by 10 and 11lb babies stomach is just... a slack flabby mess. The muscles are actually fairly strong underneath, but there is literally no exercise in the world that will get rid of the very strange and unsightly lumps and flab. So for many of us it's surgery or live with it as best you can! Anyone who asks is damn rude and impertinent. There is a lady at my son's school who I thought must be pregnant for a while, really big tummy, but I wasn't 100% sure so you know what? I never said a single word in respect of pregnancy until one day she said ''well of course I'll be on maternity leave in 2 months'' at which point I said 'wow, how wonderful, how are you feeling?'' I have been on the receiving end of ''when are you due'' (3 months ago, eff off thanks!) and it is nasty.
I lost my baby weight really easily when my Little Mister (now almost 3) was born. But it was when I started to get time to myself and two hands to eat with, that I started to reward myself with food - oops! I weigh about 7 kg more now & it mostly accumulates on my belly. People are constantly asking me when we're having another (apparently my son is obviously too old to be on his own and I've obviously missed some magical deadline that everyone else knew about), if we're trying and sometimes even subtly asking questions that make it clear they are hoping/thinking I already am pregnant again. It's getting a little annoying now! It's nobody's business when we decide to give our child a sibling and it's not nice to ask people those questions because what if they're having trouble conceiving or have even just lost a pregnancy? You never know! I can tell you now that if I was trying I wouldn't tell a soul, because no-one needs every woman and their dog counting your monthly cycles along with you and watching your belly and all your eating/drinking habits like a hawk! Back off, sisters! I've become really self conscious before I catch up with certain people now, because I think they'll start getting excited for my non existent pregnancy upon seeing me wearing that tightish top. How about we all just keep it to ourselves?? x