“The ins and outs of labour – Why the outward physical journey is just as important as the inward emotional journey when it comes to mapping your birth story.” By Melbourne doula and birth photographer, Angela Gallo.
In the last few years I have been privy to some deep conversations with a wide array of perinatal professionals. I have read more inspiring (and educational!) birth books than I can count and joined groups where I have been able to tap into the knowledge of 1000 of the best doulas & midwives I have ever come across. My journey has only just begun and I am particularly grateful because they cumulatively continue to gift me with fresh perspective and a ton of relevant information or resources that I can then take back to my own business.
And seeing as I am in the business of being the best doula I can possibly be, I take my learning experiences very seriously. Especially the kind that come directly from working with different kinds of people from different walks of life, from all corners of this globe.
I have got to be honest though.
Sometimes what I see and feel first hand conflicts with the information I am given by the most brilliant birth educators on this planet.
Sometimes I walk away from my reading material thinking, ‘This is all good in theory but…’
Top Comments
I think i'm very old-school because I tend to think that so long as you and your baby are born safe and healthily, then that's all you need....
I think that because we're in a first world country and we have just about the best statistics when it comes to the safe delivery of mother and baby that it's not unfair to want to move past that and have a birth that leaves you with a feeling of being strong and empowered and not, 'Whew, that could have gone a lot worse!'
I'd say that an equal analogy might be that people who have to scrape and scrounge for food and water don't give a toss about whether or not their bowls are made out of porcelain or plastic. But once they do have adequate food and water, then perhaps their circle of things that would make them happy widens a little. Perhaps they would like some nicer bowls and glasses to eat and drink out of.
Having a baby and mother be safe and healthy after a delivery has in the past (and still now) given a hell of a lot of leeway for really awful things to happen. Okay, so your baby was born healthy and you are feeling tired and sore, but are equally healthy. Doesn't mean that you should have had to put up with bullying, scare tactics and outright lies from people who have taken care of you, does it? My younger sister was born healthy, and my Mum was healthy after her birth. But that doesn't excuse the doctor who came in and yelled, 'She's not even close to delivering!' at the midwives and then swiping an entire tray of sterile instruments across the room and scaring the hell out of everyone and making my mother buest into tears.
The 'safe and healthy' line is one that is trotted out to women and can completely and totally invalidate every single negative feeling they might have had during their birth. 'So what if you had an unnecessary internal exam, without your consent [which if I may say so constitutes digital rape]? Your baby is healthy, that's all that matters.' Well, no it doesn't.
Safe and healthy is the absolute bare minimum in a first world country. We can, and should be doing a hell of a lot better than that.
Hear hear! I work in healthcare and the arrogance that runs through my industry (fuelled by a lack of competition, the source of all poor customer service) is shocking. "But you and bubb are healthy!" is rolled out as an excuse for terrible customer service and patient experiences. Medicine should be about continuous improvement - who knows, maybe we could do slightly better than "well, we didn't kill you or your baby - be grateful wench!'
I agree - I think it's because I've spent so much time in least-developed countries. I've developed a "it could be worse!" attitude to a lot of things. Rudeness and being a crap professional have no role in maternal health and could certainly ruin the experience for most people, let alone vulnerable women.
Wow, I couldn't agree more with this article, especially about whether or not your values are in accordance with that of your care provider. I also think that women should know, or at least be given access, to the hospital's protocols and procedures. I've seen heaps and heaps of women who are really keen on labouring in water, only to be told that they're not allowed to do that when they're having an induction. One hospital I worked at went one worse than that: even though their protocols said that women whose waters had broken were allowed to labour in a bath, there wasn't a single doctor who would actually agree to that. So even though our 'rule book' said it was fine, if the doctor didn't like that rule they could just overule it, and that was that.
All one of the many, many reasons that I suggest that women take external antenatal classes. Hospitals tell you what they want you to know, they're not going to tell you anything that they don't!
For example, if I ever had to have an induction, I know which hospital I'd be going to. That hospital gets you going very slowly (at a rate of 6mls of synthetic oxytocin per hour going through your IV to produce contractions, and this doubles every hour), and it's only once labour is established do you have to have continuous monitoring. They also have telemetry, which is monitoring without being physically attached to a CTG with wires. This is opposed to another hospital that requires continuous monitoring from the very get go, with wires, and gives you 30mls per hour that is doubled every hour through your IV. Now, of those two rates of hormone being pumped into you to produce contractions, which of the two do you think might result in the mother immediately having contractions that are so strong that she feels like she's been hit by a freight truck? Hint: it's not the first one. And guess which hospital has a way higher rate of women wanting epidurals, and higher rates of caesareans due to foetal distress? You guessed it - the second one.
But women aren't told those protocols and procedures, not unless they specifically ask, and why would a woman know to ask what the rate of syntocinon going into the IV is going to be?
It's this sort of passive hiding of information that makes it almost impossible for women to know what they're getting into, and then to feel so powerless once they discover that it's a heck of a lot more than they'd bargained or wished for.