
This month, the long-awaited Pam & Tommy premiered in all its chaotic, outlandish rock 'n roll glory.
Starring Lily James as Pamela Anderson and Sebastian Stan as Tommy Lee, Pam & Tommy tells the story behind one of the world's most famous sex tapes. Seth Rogen stars as Rand Gauthier, a porn star-turned-tradie who, after being treated terribly while doing renovations on Tommy Lee's house, plots to steal the rockstar's safe of expensive goodies.
Among cash and guns, Rand finds a tape inside, which... well, documents the couple's now infamous honeymoon.
Watch: The Pam & Tommy teaser trailer. Post continues below video.
The series aims to re-examine this infamous moment in celebrity culture. It brought about the dawn of the gross 'celebrity sex tape' era and did irreparable damage to Anderson especially.
Somehow, the creators have managed to turn such a torrid tale into prestige television. Prestige television with a talking d*ck. It's also raised a number of questions. You simply cannot see a talking animatronic penis in a TV show and NOT have questions.
Okay, let's start with the most pressing issue. WTF was up with that talking penis?
Have you been able to stop thinking about *that* penis scene? No, me neither.
Its inclusion was already a wild decision, but the origin story of this scene makes it even weirder.
In Tommy Lee's memoir, Tommyland, the drummer writes an extended part of the book as his penis. He and his d*ck, which he treats like a separate-from-him 'person', have conversations.
At one point, his penis, uh, exclaims, "No matter what you what you write in this book of yours, I promise you, people will buy it for one reason: to find out how long I really am."
So... with all that in mind, the talking penis somehow fits the story perfectly? What a strange turn of events.
Just to make things really clear: The penis that we saw on screen... talking... was not actually Sebastian Stan's own.
It was actually a prosthetic that required FOUR puppet masters.
Director Craig Gillespie described shooting the scene as "just awkward," to Variety.