If those walls could talk…

They’d probably ask for the rough side of a sponge and a fresh coat of paint.

The revelations keep coming from deep within the Playboy Mansion, this time from Playboy model Carla Howe, 25.

Once it was a monument to debauchery and hedonism; now the 22-room mansion is apparently a little more retiring, much like its aging owner Hugh Hefner, 89.

Carla Howe with Hugh Hefner. Image via Instagram.

Howe, a British model from exotic Slough, told The Sun that the house is full of women in nurses’ outfits — but that the women are, in actual fact medical professionals.

“Hef is so frail he goes everywhere with a group of nurses,” she said.

Howe isn’t the first Playboy model to speak out about the Mansion… Post continues after gallery.

Holly Madison

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Holly Madison

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Holly Madison

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Carla and Melissa Howe

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Carla and Melissa Howe

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The Howe Twins, Carla and Melissa

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Holly, Hugh & Izabella

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Hugh Hefner with girlfriends

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Karissa Shannon

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Kendra, Hugh and Crystal

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kendra with her family and Hugh and Crystal

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Kendra Wilkinson Baskett

@kendra_wilkinson_baskett

Selfie, Kendra

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“Most of the time all he wants is to play chess with his friends and watch old films.”

Just like any octogenarian Hef likes to eat early, with dinner that “tastes like hospital food” served promptly at 6:30pm.

Melissa and Carla Howe with movie-lover Hugh Hefner. Image via Instagram.

Then, it’s a movie (preferably 1950s) and off to bed by 9pm.

Personally, I’ve always wondered where Hef found the energy to entertain his youthful bunnies, even when he himself was in his prime.

The house itself has seen better days, too, Howe reckons.

There are old phones hanging off the walls, worn-out decor and a damp problem.

Brave sisters Melissa and Carla: God knows what lurks in the fetid waters of the Grotto. Image via Instagram.

Howe, who’s been going to the mansion for three years with her twin sister Melissa, describes a sort of oppressive boarding-school atmosphere.

Hef does not have sex with his remaining bunnies, she said. Like his magazine, nude women are no longer the focus for him.

He does, however, pore over press clippings, reading everything that’s written about him and his Playboy empire.

So presumably Howe won’t be subjected to life in the Playboy Retirement Village for too much longer.

Howe probably won’t make the front… Check out some iconic Playboy covers.

Celebrity Playboy covers

First ever Playboy issue - Marilyn Monroe, December 1953

Celebrity Playboy covers

Dolly Parton, October 1978

Celebrity Playboy covers

Bo Derek, March 1980

Celebrity Playboy covers

Madonna, September 1985

Celebrity Playboy covers

Pamela Anderson, February 1991

Celebrity Playboy covers

Stephanie Seymour, March 1991 on cover of celebrity Playboy

Celebrity Playboy covers

Sharon Stone, December 1992

Celebrity Playboy covers

Drew Barrymore, January 1995

Celebrity Playboy covers

Jenny McCarthy, July 1996

Celebrity Playboy covers

Marilyn Monroe, January 1997

Celebrity Playboy covers

Lisa Rinna, September 1998