by KATE SELTH
I’m sorry. If you are ever thinking of having children then I owe you an apology. I’m the one you’ve heard describing my exasperating experiences raising babies and toddlers in fine, emotional detail. Actually I think it was me and every other mother ever to live.
We need to learn to filter. I think we’re freaking you non-mums out a little.
I’ve recently become aware of this issue.
It was about the time the phrase ‘paediatric chiropractor spinal realignment’ came up. My once confident and bubbly girlfriend looked at me as her hand slid slowly down to her tiny growing bump.
‘I can’t take it anymore,’ she said. ‘There’s just too much to worry about.’
My newly pregnant friend had been listening into our conversation. It was just a normal gathering of the girls for breakfast. Those of us with kids had started bonding. Sleep loss. Sagging bodies. Vegetable refusal. Lactose intolerance and colic may have come up. We talk about regular stuff too, but our kids are a big part of our lives.
The camaraderie gives us a boost. It’s nice to know you’re not the only one going through, or who has been through, the strange and challenging early years of raising a child. Mums need support and we give it to each other.
But only about half of us at that breakfast had children. And we were exposing the rest of the girls to the inner sanctum of early parenthood. We did it often. We’ve been doing it for years.
Top Comments
Maybe I was lucky to have just missed the mountain of info that must daunt any parent-to-be these days. We just dived in, with all the advice of our friends and family, wanted or not! Somehow, due to lack of family planning, we have 5 gorgeous sons in their teens and early twenties. Honestly,I feel that the poor buggers trying to be parents now, must live up to a template of perfection. May the force be with you. P.S. If we did it, you can too!!!
I can relate to this - being pregnant with my first, I've heard my fair share of horror birth stories, horror children stories. I think some women enjoy telling you their terrible stories and seeing what reaction they can get. Good not to be ignorant, but focussing only on the negative is depressing and pointless to worry about all the "what ifs". The point is, noone is truly ready for kids, you jump in head first. One thing I didn't like was the "just wait until" comments - let me enjoy the experience now.
Being warned that our lives are never going to be the same (when we are pregnant and clearly realise that) is also not helpful. My response is - good! We are ready for our lives to change (trying for 2 years and 3 miscarriages - clearly shows we want this)