I have some news and it is a matter of urgency.
We all know Zac Efron. He has… he has the face.
And also the body. And he is also a sexy dancer and sexy singer and sexy actor and seems genuinely funny which is very rare.
Recently, I interviewed him (I'm still suspicious of why anyone trusted me with that opportunity), and was profoundly disappointed when he didn't appear to fall in love with me and want to start our life together.
But guys, it's okay.
Because now, it turns out he has a brother. Technically he's had a brother for 25 years, but the Daily Mail only told me yesterday which makes this new information.
"E-Zactly like his big brother!" read the headline, because a story isn't really a story without a pun. "Dylan Efron rivals the hunky Baywatch actor as he showcases his chiseled abs and buff arms in shirtless sailboat snap."
I didn't need to read the story. Because I'm not just here for Zac Efron's brother's abs. I'm also here for his face and various other physical features, as well as any indication his Instagram can give me of his personality.
He seems patient, as evidenced by this very nice image of him being violently attacked by his older brother: