You know what I’m putting in the bin this year, aside from the majority of 2020 and Locky’s bad chest tattoo? I’m chucking out the phrase ‘guilty pleasure,’ or more to the point I’m throwing away the notion that pleasure should be laden with guilt.
I’m proudly owning the joy that The Bachelorette, Harry Styles’ pearls, and putting Maltesers in my popcorn bucket at the movies gives me for no other reason than they make me feel good. And I refuse to feel bad for feeling good anymore.
Watch: Mamamia Confessions: What I do when I'm home alone. Post continues below.
In 2017 I started writing a sexy, romantic comedy novel about a woman in her mid-thirties who looks around at her life and realises she isn’t happy. She’s done all of the ‘right’ things, ticked all of the boxes, and she still isn’t content. So, she begins to interrogate her life and consider the things that actually bring her joy, which results in her embarking on a pleasure quest.
When I began this thorough analysis into pleasure, I posted an anonymous survey asking women to tell me what more pleasure in their lives might look like. And I was fascinated by the answers – things like wearing a bold coloured lipstick, wearing what they wanted, being the first on the dance floor, leaving their relationship, having more orgasms, or wearing lingerie.
It wasn’t grand trips to the Maldives, or shagging Zac Efron – these women knew that pleasure was possible, that these small, actionable things were in their reach and would make them feel good… and yet, still they didn’t do them.
It’s wild to me that we mindlessly trust the oppressive systems that are built to tell us how we should look, behave, and what we should and shouldn’t enjoy.
View this post on Instagram
🌷When you heal old wounds and feel light as fuck. Let go of that shit...it is heavy.🌷 Also, black and white photos aren’t my jam...but I love anything where women support other women. I am buoyed by so many bad ass, incredible, formidable women. I nominate everyone. Share all of the photos of your joy, your gloriousness, you feeling like a babe...or not...share whatever you fucking well please. Share because your Instagram is your space and and you don’t need permission to share your face or thoughts or feelings. I want to see it all, all the bloody time. It is valid. You are valid. You giant babe. Yup. 🌷 Dress: @asos Earrings: @shibuyamoon 🌷