Because living with four eyes instead of two is HARD.
1. 3D movies are some sick kind of public torture
The novelty and fun of wearing 3D glasses at the movies? It’s kind of ruined when you have to layer them over your seeing glasses, which leaves you dangerously open to being called “6 eyes”. Thanks a lot for starting it, Avatar.
2. “Can I try those on?”
Every now and then, some clown with 20/20 vision will parade around in your glasses asking whether they look smart, followed by their best nerd impression. They exclaim about how blind you are, pass them back and return to their normal routine without quite grasping that THIS IS OUR LIFE.
3. Please, please, I beg you – don’t call me a “sexy librarian”
Some are called leggy blondes, others are labelled the sultry brunette, but if you’ve got prescription lenses you will ALWAYS be the sexy librarian. Are there no other sexy women in the world who wear glasses other than those who populate libraries? No one? Really?
4. That one time you tried contact lenses
“Are you ok? You look like you’ve been crying.” – said every person you came into contact with that day
5. Don’t even try to check on anything in your oven in the presence of other humans.
Me to my dinner party guests: “Hang on a sec guys, I’ll just check how my roast is doing.”
Me with foggy glasses: “Actually I can’t see any more, can someone please give me a hand?”