Everything changes once you give birth to your first born.
Or so I’ve been told.
Your whole world perspective changes. You read headlines of lost kids and instead of taking it in as news, you worry if it will happen to yours. You hear stories of mothers and instead of judging, you feel sympathy. You go from someone confident in every decision you make, to someone who questions whether you are doing the right thing.
But all of that doesn’t compete with the change that happens in your relationship.
With your partner.
Sociologist, Janeen Baxter, studied 1,800 Australian parents on how each couple saw each other after the birth of their first baby.
Baxter says that the birth of the first child is pivotal in a relationship. She writes on Child and Family Blog, "The first birth is typically associated with deterioration in the quality of couple relationships".
More importantly, Baxter found that the views in each other's roles within the relationship did a complete one-eighty after the birth.
Before bub comes along, men and women generally see themselves as equals. Both typically earn money and both share household tasks pretty evenly (even though we know we stack the dishwasher more often).
But, once that bub comes along, things change.
Baxter says, "Both sexes changed their previous views to support more strongly the ideas that a woman’s main role is being a mother, that mothers should work only if they need the money, and that young children should not stay in childcare for prolonged periods of time."
But that is where the similarity in thinking ended.