Ok, so here’s the thing.
There is a lady in America (where else?) who, erm, lifts things with her vagina.
Yes, you read that correctly: she LIFTS things with her VAGINA.
44-year-old Kim Anami is a self-professed “Vaginal Kung Fu Master,” and has gone viral (poor choice of word) this week with her unconventional weight-lifting skills. To be specific, Kim has strengthened and trained her vaginal muscles to be able to lift everything from surfboards to mangoes. Oh honey, that’s just the TIP of the vaginally-suspended iceberg. We highly recommend you take a moment to peruse Kim’s aesthetically-beautiful-but-conceptually-confusing Instagram account, where you can see her lift the following objects with her coochie with the hashtag #thingsIliftwithmyvagina. (LOL)
The LA Series. #thingsiliftwithmyvagina And the Oscar goes to… My vagina. Best Supporting Vagina winner, for sure. I’m standing on Hollywood Boulevard, on the Walk of Fame. My vagina is hovering over the “star” of Hedy Lamarr. Some historical vagina for you: Hedy is the reason why most of you are even reading this right now. You could say she’s the most influential woman of our modern age. Not only was she touted in her day as being the “world’s most beautiful woman” by Louis B. Meyer, she had the first non-pornographic onscreen orgasm in the 1933 silent film “Ecstasy.” My kinda girl. It gets better. Tiring of acting, she took up inventing. Lamarr co-developed a frequency-hopping spread spectrum technology that is the basis for modern wifi communication. She registered the patent with her cofounder in 1942 and was inducted into the Inventor’s Hall of Fame in 2014. Beauty, brains, vagina. Even I’m impressed. #thingsiliftwithmyvagina #vaginalkungfu #vaginalsuperpowers #bestsupportingvagina #theoscargoesto #oscars A photo posted by Kim Anami (@kimanami) on