Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen have a coffee table book. Yes, I know it's exciting. And no I'm not sure how they decided which of them would go on the front cover. Rock, paper, scissors?
But take a breath, OK, because the excitement climaxes with the news that your favourite nutbag designer and mine, Mr Karl Lagerfeld is in it too. According to NY mag:
Influence consists only of interviews conducted by the Olsens
(with editor Derek Blasberg in tow) with the world's most famous
designers, photographers, artists, and tastemakers alongside pictures
of them, their work, and the Olsens. We're talking long, involved, revealing interviews that are, you know, entertaining. With people like John Galliano,
Christian Louboutin, Terry Richardson, Richard Prince, and more. Yes, a
coffee-table book that's more than worth a read! Here are a few gems
from one of our favorite interviews, with Karl Lagerfeld….
He hates tall, chatty models.
KL: [N]owadays you start to model because you're young.
Now the girls are sixteen, seventeen, fifteen, and Russian. They are
like from another planet
AO: They can look very bizarre!
KL: I hate all these tall women. They are all giants!
MKO: If only I were a little taller — that would make me happy!
KL: You are one meter fifty-one. You are taller than that?
AO: We're five feet and one inch.
KL: Oh, I thought my office told me that you were four-foot eight or
something. Not that it matters. What you need is a face. If you have a
face you don't need height or a voice. Models know this; that's why the
good ones don't need to talk much.
And he hates working with male models.
KL: I like to work with models for a long time.
Sometimes the girls change, but some girls I work with for years and
years. With male models it is different. I hate working with male
AO: Ah, well boys come and go!
KL: And I hate doing castings and things like this. "oh no you're not
right" — that's horrible to say to someone. I never do castings. Other
people do them, and then I see the result of the casting. It's
humiliating for the models.
Nor does he like to hear a man's opinion.
KL: I don't have people I don't like around me ever.
MKO: You don't have to.
KL: …I don't work with many men. I don't want to ask the men about the fashion. Their opinion doesn't interest me.
He gives the girls family-planning advice!
KL: I like more classic [shapes] now. Best thing to do
for skinny people to wear tight dresses. Although jeans are becoming
AO: Ah! Yes, it's becoming a problem. It's the worst.
KL: You can kill yourself in these jeans.
MKO: Ha, I'd rather stay inside with my friends than limp out in tight trousers.
KL: Maybe you'll stay inside with a baby. Do you want to get married? Children? Two perfect mums, yes?
[Mary-Kate and Ashley look at each other]
KL: Ah! Don't worry, you have time. You're young. Don't you want to get married?
MKO: I don't feel the need to get married. But Ashley wants children. I'll be a great aunt or godmother.
AO: To my child.
KL: [To Ashley] Are you planning?
AO: No. I don't even have a boyfriend. You have to plan that first, right? Figure that out first?
KL: If you get a boyfriend it doesn't mean that! Today you can have a
baby first. If you want. I never liked the idea of a family at all. If
it's a woman — it's more fun for a woman.