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NO. There is photographic evidence that Ciarran is NOT in Angie's final four.

To catch up on all the Bachelorette Australia 2019 recaps and gossip, check out Mamamia’s recaps and visit our Bachelorette hub page.

Fridays are supposed to be fun, but I’m about to ruin your whole goddamn day and I’m really sorry about it.

I have… terrible news.

Paparazzi photos of The Bachelorette final four have been released and it’s not what we wanted (There are spoilers below, so proceed with caution… But if you’re brave enough, there’s also some truly spectacular artwork that makes it worth it).

Mamamia’s super fan meets the bachelorette Angie Kent. Post continues below video.

Video by Mamamia

The Daily Mail have published photos of Angie Kent’s final four standing bachelors, and there’s only one long-haired man among them.

It’s… not Ciarran, the man I described as the “love child of Lucius Malfoy and Austin Powers” before the series began, but now exclusively call “angel”.

Let us take a moment to grieve.

barnaby joyce


According to the photos, we'll be visiting the hometowns of dog guy Ryan, sunflower king Timm, Carlin (and his face) and hot penguin Jackson.

The photos from August 5 show the four men filming scenes at the Bachelorette mansion. They're all casually dressed, probably on a group date, before other photos show them in their cocktail party suits.

Mamamia does not publish paparazzi photos, but who really needs to when I'm willing to put the time and effort into recreating them as pieces of literal art?

The below drawings are just as great, if not better, than the actual pics and I'll be setting up an Etsy page to sell them as prints ASAP, promise.

First, I present the men leaning against a fence (though I forgot to... draw... the fence):

It's really hard to draw a bald man looking down.

Then they shuffle to behind a flowery fence so Timm can also put his arm around Ryan:

They're behind a... fence.

A quick costume change for Jackson...

Yes hello this is a shirtless Jackson behind a nondescript bush/shrub/plant

Gotta keep hydrated:

Pensive Ryan enjoys his cuppa

Ciarran may be gone, but this may just be best dressed cocktail party yet:

Timm dapper in his suit
Carlin dapper in his suit
Ryan dapper in his suit (and some newly acquired stubble)
Jackson dapper in his suit

And finally, it was important to include this cameo from Super Osh™ himself:

It's an O not a donut :(

Angie was also captured, wrapped up with a blanket in her cocktail party dress but... I know my limits.

(I don't know why you would, after such detailed artistic impressions, but if you want to see the real photos you can do so here).

So, there we have it. The final four revealed. Is anyone else still crying?

Catch up on the full story on our daily entertainment podcast The Spill.