This is one of those times when you are completely justified in thinking, “Doesn’t the internet ever stop? Why do I have to keep caring about this stupid stuff on the internet? I’m so tired. Sometimes I just want to curl up on the sofa with a family size bag of microwaveable popcorn and have some goddamn peace from the cats in boxes, the man with two penises and the teenagers planking, OK?”
You may indeed be justified in thinking that but on this occasion you are not justified in looking away. Well, not just yet.
If you’ve been on said internet today, you may have noticed everyone talking about #AlexFromTarget. That’s because while you were sleeping, 449,000 teenagers became obsessed with this guy called Alex. He works at Target.
Here’s Alex. At Target. Where he works.
Perplexed? Confused? Mildly disinterested in this good looking teenage boy’s overnight fame? Let’s go through how it happened step by step, so we can fake our way through a conversation at the water cooler later this afternoon.
1. Explain to me who this human being is and why I should care. I told you, I don’t have time for this, so make it quick.
OK. A teenage girl took this photo of a cute Target employee and put it on Twitter. Hundreds of thousands of teenage girls retweeted that photo, and now this guy is famous. As you probably know by now, teenage girls are the most powerful and terrifying group of people on the planet. They choose to obsess over one dreamy checkout guy, and that dreamy checkout guy becomes a celebrity immediately. So that’s what happened.