When I woke up that morning, a part of me knew.
Something had changed. The wind appeared to be blowing in a different direction. The air around me wasn’t quite the same. The world looked an unusual colour, and it was clear something bad was going to happen.
I had met someone who I’d let myself imagine a future with, and in that very act, I’d cursed it.
To be clear, I wasn’t being ignored. This person was far too kind for that, which made it all that much harder. His tone had changed. His texts were slightly shorter, just that little bit less enthusiastic.
And I knew what was coming, as if I was in my own movie, and the ominous, tragic music had started playing loudly and suddenly.
“Hey, I’m really sorry, but there’s something I need to tell you,” he wrote in a message.
“I really like you. A lot. And at a different time, I think this could have been amazing. But my ex-girlfriend has come back into my life, and I feel like I just need to give it another go. I’m really sorry, and I wish you all the best.”
Is there anything crueller than something ending before it ever really began?
We’d been seeing each other for a few months, and I hadn’t liked someone this much in years. He was everything I’d been looking for.
I’d let myself think that it was my turn, and maybe all the awful dating experiences I’d endured, had culminated in this moment. I could speak about them now in past tense, with a little laugh, lamenting my tumultuous early twenties.
But now the heartbreak wasn’t in the past. It was awfully present.
LISTEN: I discuss my dating experiment on Mamamia Out Loud. Post continues below.
Top Comments
Been Caspered - also for a Return of the Ex. Twice. Both cases ended with the guy marrying the returned ex.
So IMO, not only is honesty the best policy for all (do you really want to continue dating a guy who is still looking elsewhere for “the one”? And should he feel guilty about leaving you in the dark?) , but it is obviously often quite warranted!
It takes a brave bloke to lay their feelings out like that, I take it as a sign of their true character.
Would I prefer that a guy with that kind of integrity see me as “the one”? Yes. Yes, and it does kinda suck to see them happy with someone else, I’ll admlt to that lol. But it means even more that they are happy. Not to mention it restores my faith in finding a top guy one day, they are out there!
I am a guy and this happened to me. An exhilarating few weeks, then a text to call before I come up to the city to see her. I call, and her first comment was “your not going to likethis”.She ackowledged there was amazing chemistry between us but her ex (from many months before) had wanted to meet for “closure “...... she went along for apparent closure and realised she still had massive feelings for him. For the next week I was in an episode of the Bachelor as she agonised over what to do. She chose him as she knew him better! I thought I had found the one after a few goes following my separation........ gutting.