More and more men are going to great lengths to pop the question – and it’s gone too far.
Choreographed flash mobs. Professional videographers. Live broadcasts. Thousands — no, millions — of YouTube hits. To me, these are the makings of an overproduced Super Bowl Halftime Show. Not a marriage proposal.
And yet, we’re seeing it more and more: men going to great lengths to pop the question, from this movie trailer to a Glee-themed flash mob to the guy who spent four years traveling to 26 countries to make his proposal video. Call me a curmudgeon, but isn’t it all a bit much?
Don’t get me wrong: I’m a romantic at heart. Before my now-husband proposed, I had grandiose ideas of what it might be like to see him get down on one knee. But that vision never included a thousand costumed strangers.
As it turned out, he asked me to marry him in bed at 6 a.m. while I was half asleep — my retainer still in place — before we went scuba diving in Belize. For me, this ended up being perfect. Because, really, it’s not about how you ask, it’s about what you’re asking.
I’ve told our low-key proposal story at least 50 times at this point, but the story isn’t the point. It’s the decision to get married that matters. Everything else is just details. Or, perhaps, a distraction.
Turning “the ask” into a performance devalues the question.
While I’m not trying to hate on men who went to great lengths to propose, I suspect these guys spent more time perfecting their dance moves than considering the decision to spend their lives with another human. (And you have to wonder: Do they make these videos in the hopes that they go viral and thus allow them to achieve Internet celebrity? Because yikes.)
The whole thing kind of reminds me of the way medieval knights used to joust in order to “win” an onlooking lady’s hand. Today, a guy shows off his skills of creativity and hard work while his girlfriend passively sits there and watches.