If you're single, it's time to claim Valentine's Day back for what it is really meant for.

We’d never spoken before the 14th. As we sat on the bus, he passed me a box of chocolates and a card with a handwritten poem scrawled inside – and just like that I had my first boyfriend.

We were in Year 7 and it lasted two weeks before we decided to break up (over text), just in time for the Saturday disco.

The ending might not be happily ever after, but there’s a lot we can learn from little 11 year old Isaac this Valentine’s Day.

Listen: Get all your love life advice with her newest podcast, hosted by Osher Gunsberg. Post continues….

Swallowed up by the romantic dinners, extravagant gifts and in-your-face-soppy social media posts, the real meaning of this day of love – to tell your crush you fancy them – has been forgotten. (And by ‘real meaning’ we mean what you did in high school, obviously.)

According to new research from eHarmony, 52 per cent of people who have a crush are ignoring the opportunity of Valentine’s Day to let them know for one reason only – a fear of rejection.

As a result, over a quarter of singles now regard the holiday as a day just for couples rather than a chance to spark their own new romance.

Singles, it’s time to claim it back.


The time has come. Image: Paramount Pictures.


"There has been a shift in recent years to perceiving Valentine’s Day as a day for established couples, and a day to show your partner how much you love them, rather than the idea of – often anonymously – reaching out to your crush to say you admire them. But singles should feel free to go back to basics and be a secret admirer or face up to your crush!," says Jacqui Manning, eHarmony’s relationship expert and psychologist.

While it can be scary to make that first move, there's a very strategic reason to do it on Valentine's Day.

"We used to throw out a cupid’s arrow to our crush without too much weight or heaviness attached, and although a positive response would of course be welcomed, it had a light-hearted essence so it really didn’t matter either way, as you were ‘under the cover’ of V-Day," says Manning.

"If you were rejected, chances are you were in good company, as so many people were putting their hearts out there together on the one day. ​"

It doesn't have to be anything over the top either - just a simple gesture to let them know how you feel.

"Have a light-hearted approach – find a way to express yourself that feels light and fun, there are so many options these days. For example, send a snail mail card, some flowers or utilise the online world by sending a cute e-card like these ones from eHarmony," she says. (Post continues after gallery.)


"Take a deep breath and ask yourself – what’s the worst that can happen? They might not reciprocate your feelings and that may hurt, ‘tis true, however at least then you will know and be able to move on."

You got this.

(And also we like puppies, you know. Just in case.)