Why did Tyrone Unsworth think his school didn't care?

By Lesley Podesta

At the end of a year that saw so much high-profile discussion about children’s rights to feel safe, how tragic it is that we find ourselves mourning the suicide of young Queenslander Tyrone Unsworth, and asking how his death could have been prevented.

Tyrone’s loss is a devastating reminder about the urgent need to change the way we manage bullying in our schools.

Tyrone was a 13-year-old Brisbane boy who tragically saw no other choice but to take his life after years of incessant homophobic bullying.

I was shocked to read that only a month prior to his death, he was assaulted by another student with a fence paling, outside school hours.

But what made my heart sink even further was reading that the day before he took his own life, he told a friend that his school did not care.

Why did Tyrone think his school didn’t care?

The school has since admitted it was aware of the assault but was unaware of the consistent bullying suffered by Tyrone. And, if the school genuinely didn’t know about the bullying, why didn’t it know?

The resulting tragedy highlights that Tyrone’s school community was ill-equipped to identify and address the abuse which ultimately lead to his tragic suicide.

This incident highlights the need to support our hard-working teachers so that they can support children who are traumatised by violence and bullying, both after hours and in the schoolyard. It highlights the need to talk about respect, tolerance and friendship.

The truth is we all played a role in the death of this young man, and we all have a burden to bear.

We all play a role. Our schoolyards mirror the values of our community, our children reflect the world around them. We need to understand the consequences of the discussions we have, at the kitchen table, in the staff room and in the office.

Many people say that “bullying is just part of growing up”. This is wrong.

Bullying is not testing boundaries or healthy competition between peers.

Bullying is an ongoing misuse of power in relationships through repeated aggressive verbal, physical and/or social behaviour on or offline that intends to cause physical and/or psychological harm, distress or fear. It can involve an individual or a group misusing their power over one or more persons. Bullying can happen in person or online, and it can be obvious (overt) or hidden (covert).

We know that adults who were bullied at school experience negative mental health outcomes as a result; in the short term, high rates of suicide and suicidal ideation, self-harm, and in the longer term, alcohol abuse and drug use. And in the most devastating of cases, a young person takes his or her own life.

Education is key. Not just stern words from a school principal or a teacher. We need a holistic approach to education that teaches children respectful and inclusive behaviours, from the beginning.

We need our lawmakers and decision-makers to deliver education policies that not only prepare children for their future profession, we also need children to understand the impact their actions can have on each other – for a lifetime.

Through the National Centre Against Bullying (NCAB), we know that one in five Australian children is bullied and we know one in seven is cyber-bullied.

We know that 61 per cent of young people who identify as LGBTIQ report verbal abuse, according to a 2010 La Trobe University study

The study also found that 18 per cent experienced physical abuse and 69 per cent reported other forms of harassment because of their sexuality, like exclusion and rumours. Tragically, their school was identified as the most likely place of abuse. They did not feel safe in their school.

We know there is a clear disconnect between what we know is happening through research, what we know works to stop it and what is occurring in our classrooms and playgrounds. And we know that we need a more effective way so that children like Tyrone have a safe way to seek help and support. We need a national framework to prevent bullying with clear pathways for support and intervention.

No child should feel as isolated and alone as Tyrone ever again.

As we continue to mourn Tyrone’s death, please let us look at bullying through new lenses. Let’s be proud to live in a community that supports all of its children.

Lesley Podesta is CEO of the Alannah and Madeline Foundation.

This post originally appeared on ABC News.