A post about the three things men want in a partner has gone viral. And it's... messed up.

Oh. Quiet please because this is very important.

If you find yourself lying awake at night, muttering to yourself, “What exactly are men looking for?” then GO TO SLEEP IMMEDIATELY because we have the answer.

Lori Alexander, a self-described Christian mother-of-four, outlines the three very specific things men want in a marriage on her blog, The Transformed Wife

Firstly, a man does not want a woman who has gone to university, mostly because he doesn’t want your (stupid) debt. It’s inconvenient and a lil’ bit rude to bring debt into a marriage, you see.

Secondly, hymen please. Men want a woman who is a virgin for reasons that are unclear.

Speaking of unclear, thirdly, if you want a man to love you you’re not allowed to have tattoos. Alexander provides precisely no explanation as to… why… but we trust her implicitly because obviously. 

Here’s what those dating terms really mean. Post continues. 

“Sadly, most young Christian women wouldn’t listen to their husbands since they’ve not been taught to live in submission to their husband,” Alexander explains.

University is apparently also delaying women from starting a family. Alexander asks, “Is college worth having less children? I will never understand how women prefer careers over having precious babies.”

No judgement, of course. Alexander is just pointing out the clear relationship between wanting to study a degree in order to broaden career opportunities and hating babies everywhere. That’s all.

Her blog post, aptly titled “Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins Without Tattoos“, has been shared almost 26,000 times, probably mostly by men who would very much like a debt-free virgin without tattoos but for some reason are, bizarrely, struggling to find a partner.

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