
By: Dr Deborah McFadden for Your Tango.
We all live busy lives, and, for most of us, there isn’t enough time to do everything that we need to do. Marriages suffer for many couples because the relationship takes a hit in order to cover the rest of the bases.
We take a lot of things for granted in our marriages because we always come back together and because we have been together and have a lot of history. We assume that our spouses know how we truly feel about them, but honestly they need to hear certain things from our spouses from time to time.
Here's a list of 12 things that your spouse needs to hear from you more often:
1. “I love you.”
Sometimes we think because we've said “I love you” a few times, we don't need to keep saying it. However, it's important to let your spouse know on a regular basis that they're loved and adored and that you want to always be by their side.
2. “I enjoy being with you.”
What a joy it is to hear your spouse say that they really enjoy being with you no matter how long you've been together.
3. “Your opinion is important to me/your feelings are important to me.”
It's so important to one’s self esteem to know that what you think and feel matters to someone else, especially the person you're closest to.
4. “You look great!”
It feels good to know that your spouse is paying attention to how you look. It makes you want to look your best.
5. “I’m so glad I married you.”
When you say this to your spouse, you're saying, "Out of everyone else in the world I choose you today and always. Our relationship was and is a choice! We choose each other in the good and the bad, in the joys and the sorrows of life."
6. “What do you want to do?”
It's important for us to not just assume we know what our spouse wants to do or where they want to go. We need to ask questions and let them respond and possibly sacrifice what we want to do for what the other wants to do. If something is important to your spouse, but not as important to you, learn to give to your spouse in that area.
7. “I can’t wait to be with you.”
This says, "I love being with you and miss you when we are not together. I think about you throughout my day and look forward to being at home with you."
8. “Our relationship is the most important one I have on this earth.”
Hearing these words is encouraging, relationship building, and can help a spouse to hang in there and not feel disheartened when life is getting in the way of spending the kind of time together we desire.
