The whole ‘how to please your man’ accusation is not a new one for Cosmo. And in many ways, it’s true. Cosmo has always run a whole lot of content that covers this subject.
I will say two things about that.
Firstly? Women want to know how to be good in bed. They do. We do. I know this because sales always increased when we ran coverlines like “How to blow his mind” etc. Which we did often BECAUSE THE READERS WANTED IT. Not all women are born with the knowledge or the confidence to go for gold in the bedroom.
And like every other area of our lives – our hair, our careers, our wardrobes, our relationships, our brains – women like a bit of self-improveent. We like to get better at things. We like to do things well. Sex is no exception.
During my time at Cosmo – and I think it would be safe to say before
and after me too – there was always equal (ok maybe not EQUAL) emphasis
on encouraging and educating women on how to get more enjoyment from
sex THEMSELVES. With or without a guy, in fact. Maybe alone. Maybe with
a sex toy. Maybe with another woman. Whatever.
The point was always – way back from when Helen Gurley Brown first
launched Cosmo in the sixties in America – that a woman deserves a
satisfying sex life as much as the man she’s sleeping with.
I’m not sure if girls today share that philosophy. I’m not sure if it’s
not become all about a performance – pashing another girl to please a
guy. Swinging around a pole to please a guy. Dressing like a hooker to
please a guy.
Lord I hope not because that is sad. And any man worth his testosterone
should prefer a woman who is genuinely happy to be there than acting
out a role simply to please him.