True colours, shining through.
We’ve reached the third week of Celebrity Apprentice, and we’ve already lost arguably the most entertaining of our celeb-preneurs, Gabi and Blake. I like to imagine they’re watching the show together, he grasping his ever-present red rose and she with her state-ordered ankle bracelet.
This week opens with another busy city montage, overlaid with the dulcet tones of Sophie Monk reading the weather on the esteemed Kyle and Jackie O Show.
En route to this week’s mystery destination, Richard Reid is still crowing over the demise of his nemesis/tender lover Blake last week.
The fleet of 4WDs carrying their precious celebrity cargo arrive at a boxing gym. Who should be in the ring? None other than Daddy Warbucks himself, Mark Bouris. He is eventually allowed by his opponent to win.
Geoffrey is dressed in a red tracksuit and a gold rope chain and resembles Ben Stiller’s character in The Royal Tenenbaums, if he’d aged terribly and added some hip-hop flava.
Bouris is pissed Monk’s on the radio doing her job and not admiring him as he boxes like a middle-aged upper-class Rocky Balboa.
stupid pointless task designed to create maximum humiliation challenge is to take over a gym, build a fitness programme, put it on a DVD and market it. Whoever sells the most DVDs wins or something. I would pay so much money to see Geoffrey Edelsten do Aerobics OZ-style.
James is having his usual moment of self-flagellation for agreeing to this caper. Soon, he’ll take himself off to a corner and remind himself of his family’s empty stew pot and the fact that they’ll all end up in the workhouse if he doesn’t apprentice the hell out of this show.
Alleged actress Esther tells us that as a model/actress with gym experience, she’s uniquely equipped to deal with this challenge.
Warbs explains that someone will be fired from the losing team after this challenge, which seems a little redundant at this point, but terrified expressions are edited in to give it gravitas.
Sophie arrives after the pep-talk. “I’m gonna get foired!” she says, gleefully.
Meanwhile, Richard tells Sideshow Dormer and Geoffrey that he loves going to the gym and doing what sounds like jazzercise. “So I really think we should cater to that audience,” he says. “Young Sydneysiders who go to the gym.”
“Fifty-year-old gay men,” contradicts Dormer, which I don’t believe is a burn but merely a stated fact.