entertainment

What the smeg happened on The Block last night?

Was I watching the wrong show?

I’m new to the show, guys. It only took me 215 seasons to get on board. But I assumed, perhaps naively, that it was a show about building and renovation.

When I sat down to watch last night’s episode, I was all ready to see a bit of brickie bum crack, before various design choices for rooms, nice before and after makeover shots, and tips on how to choose the right eleven cushions to display on your bed.

Am I watching the wrong show?

Because the entire hour was filled with moments like this:

A full changing room outfit makeover montage. Not even loosely associated with home renovation. You might argue that this contestant is looking up close at this mirror for the master bedroom. You’d be wrong. She was shopping for a new outfit.

And then there was this bizzaro karaoke-in-the-car moment that definitely was totally spontaneous, and totally not set up by a producer hoping something goes viral.

Where is the feature wall in this scene? (via Facebook)

If I want to watch people singing pop songs in cars, I will turn the rear-view mirror slightly so I can see myself doing it, thanks. And TBH, I prefer my drivers to keep both, at LEAST one hand on the wheel.

Then, just when I thought there might be some decisions made around furniture, there was a dinner at a Greek restaurant to get to.

OPA!

I AM CONFUSED, THE BLOCK.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Do you need us to #putourbricksout for your builders?

Is it because 45 minutes of nailing things to other things is boring? Is it because your foreman, the world’s grumpiest guy, constantly brings the mood down, being a prick and reminding everyone that renovating is the least fun thing in the world?

Is it because sometimes you need to show something other than the constant mansplaining to Vonni and Suzi?

Can we please get back to the cushions?

Thanks.

Is it always like this? Educate me, people who watch The Block.

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