So on Friday, I posted about Ralph Lauren here and pointed out that maybe he and his people had LOST THEIR FREAKING MARBLES. The 7pm Project called to see if I wanted to come on the show on Friday night and even though I was meant to be going out for an early dinner with a couple of friends, I took the radical decision to push my dinner back to 7:30pm so I could do it. I know. Crazy stuff.
The show often does live crosses to different cities around Australia because it’s filmed in Melbourne and that meant I had to go in to Channel 10’s studios in Sydney. No drama. Easier than jumping on a plane.
I arrive at the station at 6:30pm to allow half an hour for make-up. I had the option of arriving at 6pm if I wanted my hair done as well but I couldn’t be bothered. I thought (foolishly) that I could just whip the GHD through it myself before I left home.
The station was almost deserted and it was just me in the make-up room with the lovely Trinity working some magic. Fortunately, she was fast enough to also do my hair because my own job had been very bad. At about ten to seven, a producer came to escort me through the bowels of the building (every TV station seems to be a rabbit warren) and up to the room where you do the live cross.
Actually, ‘room’ is a lie. ‘Cupboard’ is probably closer. Let’s compromise and say it was about the size of a small bathroom. A green curtain hung at the back and in front of it was the guest’s chair. In front of that was a huge camera with a small monitor in it. An audio person came and helped me thread the radio microphone cord up under my shirt and clip the box part to my jeans (audio people are always very discreet which is good because they see more people’s underwear than you could possibly imagine) and then put an earpiece in my ear so I could hear people talking to me and left.
The camera operator told me where to look and then went to walk out of the room too. “Are you leaving me here on my own?” I said and there must have been an alarmed tone in my voice because she kind of sighed and said “I guess I can stay here if you want but I usually have to be out there with the monitors”.
Clearly, she thought I was needy and claustrophobic or scared of abandonment or something so I assured her I’d be fine. “Just didn’t realise it was like this” I said to her back as the door closed.
Right. With a few minutes before the show was due to start, different people would occasionally appear in my ear to make sure I could hear them and let me know how long until we were on air. Directors, producers, host Charlie Pickering. And then the show started and I settled in to watch it.