Mamamia recaps The Bachelor: Precisely no one is impressed with Locky at the hometowns.

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We open on Locky having a breakfast think. 

It's hometowns week, and he has some big decisions to make. 

He's trying to decide how to reduce his number of girlfriends in the mansion, while also taking into account his girlfriends in and around the greater Perth area, the ones in Bali, plus all the girls' DMs he slid into just last night. 

"6 INSTAGRAM INFLUENCERS SQUARED = ?"  

First up, it's Izzy's hometown date. 

He meets her at the mansion and they do some unnecessary yoga and that's when we meet the real underdog of this season...

LOCKY'S THIRD NIPPLE. 

"SWEETIE, WHERE YA BEEN?"  

Locky starts yelling "I'M SPECIAL, MAMA SAID I WAS A SPECIAL BOY" and Izzy becomes increasingly concerned that what Locky is actually looking for in a woman is a... third nipple. 

It's just another unrealistic beauty standard women have to strive for in 2020 tbh. 

They do some awkward yoga poses and then Locky, Izzy and Locky's third nipple kiss. 

Izzy tells Locky she grew up in a commune and Locky expects that Izzy's two mums are going to rub his third nipple with a crystal and give him their blessing. 

Instead Izzy's feminist mum is a bit suss about this tall man who appears to be dating half of Australia. 

Izzy's other mum straight up asks Locky if he understands that marriage means monogamy i.e. not dating approximately 223489 women at once. 

He seems... confused. 

Izzy's mum then asks Locky how he feels about feminism and he says "it's a hard one" which was definitely not the right answer. 

Locky then lists off some feminist ideas that he definitely read on a slideshow on Instagram and he seems to win the mums over. 

Izzy's mum announces she has a question that is a "tiny bit out there" and then she asks if Izzy can have a little bit of Locky's sperm as a consolation prize if she doesn't win. 

Locky and his third nipple don't know what to do. 

"THIS IS JUST SO UNEXPECTED FOR US."  

Locky gets ready to leave and Izzy walks him outside. She tells him she can definitely see herself falling in love with him, which is awkward because she's going to be sent home in approximately 40 minutes. 

Next, it's Irena's hometown. 

Irena meets Locky in her activewear because... hikes, etc. They kiss under a waterfall because Osher is yet to meet the "waterfall kiss" quota for this year. 

They lie on a blanket, and Irena tells Locky about her scary brother Igor who could want a bit of his sperm too. 

Then Osher pops up out of the bushes. He tells Irena her family is back in lockdown in Melbourne so they won't be able to make it to Sydney for the hometown date. 

They go back to the mansion and Zoom Irena's family. Igor immediately begins yelling "get your hands off my sister". 

He then asks Locky for a private Zoom chat. No one is more excited about the potential drama than Irena's dad... 

LOVES IT. 

Igor tells Locky he likes to chase Irena's boyfriends with a pitchfork and then he asks Locky why Irena is different to his 464564 Instagram girlfriends. 

Locky says he's never met anyone like Irena before because she has a job and she's nice to him etc, etc. 

Irena and Locky walk outside and Irena tells Locky she's "crazy in love" with him. 

It's time for Bec's hometown pls. She's still... here. 

Locky meets Bec at Rose Bay Beach for some stand up paddle boarding. Locky continually attempts to drown them in the ocean.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

They meet Bec's family, and she has a protective brother too. This one is named Brad, and he and his... moustache have some questions for Locky. 

"I've seen the rumours."  

Brad asks Locky what his favourite thing is about Bec and Locky says he would have liked to have Zoom calls with her on... mute. 

THAT NOT BE THE RIGHT THING TO SAY. 

Locky and Bec walk outside to say goodbye and Bec tells Locky she's never been in love and she doesn't use that word lightly. 

Locky is confused as to why a woman he's known for three weeks won't profess her undying love to him. 

Finally, it's Bella's hometown date. 

They cook Bella's mum's favourite meal together, and then Bella's family arrives. 

Bella's dad Steve is in IT security and he's been doing his "research'" on Locky. 

After dinner, Steve takes Locky for a chat. He tells him he was a fan on him on Survivor but now he's... not. 

He's been reading about him in the media, you see, and he knows all about the girlfriends. 

"I've put together a spreadsheet."  

Locky tells him he's only ever had one girlfriend and... sir. 

Bella walks Locky out, and cries about how scary it is to tell him she loves and then finally... tells him she loves him. 

It's rose ceremony time. 

Osher arrives and whispers that two women will be leaving tonight. 

Irena receives a rose. 

Bella receives a rose. 

Bec says goodbye to Locky and doesn't seem that... concerned. 

Locky takes Izzy outside to say goodbye. He tells her she's amazing, and she brings out the best in him. 

No word yet on whether she got the... sperm. 

Only one more sleep until Locky chooses Irena, and Bella chooses... Instagram. 

UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT. 

Catch up on the rest of our recaps here: 

• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 1: One woman has an epic meltdown about the colour of her... hair.
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 2: An intruder arrives and the rest of the women COMPLETELY LOSE IT. 
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 3: A "sneaky" move at the cocktail party destroys a friendship.
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 4: This show is becoming more ridiculous by the minute.
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 5: These cocktail parties need to be... banned. 
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 6: Thank God a global pandemic is about to shut this show down. 
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 7: Locky just sent 50% of the drama home in a mass eviction.
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 8: GOOD LORD, even during lockdown Roxi manages to storm off.
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 9: An intruder causes both of Roxi's personalities to... lose it. 
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 10: Roxi just stormed off the show and precisely no one is surprised.
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 11: Dear God, Bella needs to... STOP. 
• Mamamia recaps The Bachelor Episode 12: Every single person on this show has... lost it.

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