parents

"Stop telling us we're sexualising our children."

The Bachelor “winner” Snezana Markoski has been blasted by “trolls” for sexualising her daughter Eve in an Instagram photo promoting a coffee-based scrub.

In the post, Snezana and Eve are wearing shower caps, not wearing much at all (although Eve’s body is hidden by her mum’s legs), covered in the scrub, both pouting at the camera.

She posted the photo with the caption, “Eve hates coffee but this one passes her test!!”

Within minutes Snezana was being attacked online for sexualising her 10-year-old daughter, although you’d have a hard time finding the attacks in among all the comments about how great her boobs looked.

Great job of sexualising a child.

Sorry but that is the harsh reality of it. If only you knew what goes through their mind. Encourage her to be a 10-year-old, not posing images of what should be an 18-year-old.

It’s a great photo but I feel if your going to shoot with your daughter maybe not with the boobs out on display, as she is putting on a pose could try something else with the daughter

Strike a sexual pose next to child whilst almost naked. Have child strike sexual pose. Post on ig.

Snezana and her many fans quickly defended the image.

How the hell is this sexualising a child? Only a pervert would say that. You’re gross.

This is not sexualising, you are disgusting for thinking that!”

Soo annoying that’s people are offended by this but if it was a good looking man and his son no problem.

Not sure why everyone is so constipated over this photo? Nothing wrong with it? people these days.

Snezana said: To all the haters. Stay tuned, you’re gonna have so much more to be p***** about. Then she posted this.

There are a couple of definitions of “sexualise”.

The first is “to make sexual” and the second is to “attribute sex or a sex role to”. The idea that Snezana has magically transformed her daughter into a child capable of portraying or feeling sexual thoughts is ridiculous and pretty impossible. You can’t actually make somebody sexual.

In fact it’s the people who suggested Snezana had sexualised her daughter who are doing the sexualising, by attributing sex or a sex role to something that is completely innocent. The photo is of a mother and daughter having a bit of fun, playing pretend, sharing a moment and just mucking around. I have taken countless similar photos of myself with my children where we are pouting and posing and being silly.

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Sex has nothing to do with them.

The post has had almost 800 comments since it was originally posted this week. I spent an uncomfortable few minutes scrolling through them and reading them all and what really struck me was the idea that some people honestly believe Snezana is sexualising her daughter when the fact is that the nature of images involving children shouldn’t matter.

Children are not for sex. They are just kids. The idea that someone can “sexualise” them is pretty lame.

The sad fact is that people who see a child as sexy in any circumstance is going to see that regardless of what that child is wearing or what they are doing. By suggesting a child has been sexualised or is acting sexy or anything like that eludes to the fact that children (or their parents) are somehow to blame for children being seen or treated as sexual objects or worse still, used for sex.

It’s an uncomfortable conversation, I know, but one we have to have regularly because as a parent I’m sick of the fact I am meant to be protecting my children from sickos and predators by refraining from posting photos of them in swim suits at the beach or running around in their nappies.

That’s the equivalent of me wearing turtlenecks and loose-fitting dresses for the rest of my life just in case someone looks at me and has a sexual thought.

Plus, you can’t sexualise a child. They are children and aren’t sexual regardless of what they wear or how they look in photos.

We shouldn’t ever be put in a position where we have to adjust our behaviour in order to feed the idea that we can somehow stop evil thoughts, feelings and actions by altering our behaviour. I refuse to raise my children that way.

Snezana has done nothing wrong by posting this photo and parents who post similar images of their children have done nothing wrong either. Trying to make her feel shame over the posting of this photo, of calling the pose “sexual” while well-meaning (by some) is sadly part of the problem.

If we get to a stage where we have to carefully assess each photo we want to share of our children and think, “Would a pedophile get turned on by this?” then sadly, the sickos have won.

Tags: celebrity , childhood , parenting-2
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