friendship

"My son's BFF is moving and he is utterly devastated."

My friend moving away is hard enough. Telling my son his best friend is moving was even worse.

When my best friend told me she was moving to Darwin I thought she was joking.

When she mentioned her husband had applied for a new job, I secretly hoped it would fall through and she wouldn’t have to move half way across the country.

But it was only a few weeks before everything had been approved and he was flying up looking for a house.

Eventually, I accepted the fact one of my favourite people in the world was leaving me (I was being selfish at this point so leaving ‘ME’ is the appropriate phrase here). I met her when my eldest son was two-weeks-old. We met at a mothers’ group. Her daughter just a few weeks older than my little one. From that moment on she was, and still is, my go-to gal.

My rock.

She is the mummy friend I’d always dreamt I’d have. The friend with the same parenting philosophies.

In the years that followed we both had another child. She was like a second mum to my two boys and we were so excited when she had a boy of her own a few years later.

I love her kids like they are my own.

The kids!

OMG in my selfish hour, I’d forgotten about the kids. How was I going to tell Master C his best friend was moving?

Master C and Miss C have been inseparable since they were babies. Even when they went to different schools they constantly asked to see each other on weekends and enrolled in Nippers together on the weekend.

I approve of their future wedding.

They have, on many occasions, planned their future wedding (which, for the record, I totally support).

And now I was faced with the heart wrenching task of telling my little guy that in just a few short months his BFF would be moving 4000km away.

As a child, I moved around a lot but I was never the one to be left. I had no idea how he would take the news or how he would feel.

“Darwin?” He queried. “As in, way up the top of Australia?”

“Yes buddy. WAY up the top. A long way away.” I replied.

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“But why?” He asked with glassy eyes, “I’ll miss her.”

His younger brother, also a close friend of Miss C, was just at devastated.

“Darwin is like near the moon?” His little four-year-old brain not quite comprehending what north meant.

As the days went on, and as resilient as kids are, they took the news as best as I could have hoped.

Now with only a few weeks left before they fly out my friend and I are making plans for how we can keep the kids in touch.

At least, unlike during my childhood, we have email, Skype and Facetime.

Birthdays won't be the same over Skype.

We’ve already made a point of even more regular catch ups while they are still here and we are planning a movie night and sleep over, for all the kids and my friend and I (because I’m a big baby and probably taking the news worse than anyone).

While we are in an era of the internet and social media and my friend and I can Facebook and email and have cuppas over Skype it still won’t be the same.

And for my son and his bestie it will be even harder. To a six-year-old, your best friend moving away is still your best friend moving away.

The cuddles, the laughs and endless summer adventures playing with the backyard hose.

As the big day approaches the tears become more regular and I know there will be a big phase of adjustment as my son deals with his best friend moving away.

My friend and I are doing everything we can to make the move easier for all of us, but we know things won’t be the same.

I know that we’ll all survive, after all I did it myself as a child, but I also know they’ll be missed greatly.

On the upside it looks like I’ll be organising a holiday to Darwin.

Has your child had a friend move away? Have you moved your children? How did your family cope?

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What moving overseas with kids is really like.

It’s not a holiday, it’s just moving the children to a different location.