Here is a sentence I never thought I’d type:

Sofia Vergara is my actual twin. But only when she’s, you know, seriously ill, overcome with phlegm, and has a fever of 38.9°C.

Yeah. Only then.

You see, the 44-year-old has snottily emerged on Instagram from her hotbed of viral plague – sans makeup andsans the will to live.

A post shared by Sofia Vergara (@sofiavergara) on

Apr 11, 2017 at 11:17am PDT

Don’t worry – her 12.2 million followers were as perplexed as you are right now.

“You look 15 years old!” one comment read. “I didn’t even recognise you!” read another. And my personal favourite, “How the actual f**k is this possible.”

Indeed.

While Vergara might look like a freakin’ supermodel who just shaved two decades off her life (same), she is literally all of us fighting off a cold.

LISTEN: The effect being chronically sick had on Sylvia Freedman. Post continues…

I don’t have any factual evidence to back this up, but I’m sure she’s wearing ratty bed socks underneath that doona. I’m positive she’s watched every rerun of Peter Everett’sReady Steady Cook, and thinks there might be sneaky favouritism towards the Tomato votes over the Capsicum ones. She’s definitely demolished a full pack of Vicks VapoDrops and is wondering if the chemist assistant will judge her if she returns to grab some more. (None of this is at all my personal experience… um. Obviously.)

She even has big ol’ bowl of ugly I-don’t-even-know-what-flavour-this-is soup to comfort her.

A post shared by Sofia Vergara (@sofiavergara) on

Apr 11, 2017 at 2:38pm PDT

Keep going, Sofia.

The end is near.

In makeup-free, oily-haired illness we trust.