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Mamamia recaps SAS Australia: Two celebrities are brutally culled from the competition.

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We've reached the final episodes of SAS Australia and precisely everyone (including... myself) has lost it. 

We open on base camp, where the celebrities are facing Angry James Bond in the yard.

As usual, he's angry. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"Some of you are here by the skin of your teeth. Some of you have just given it all, but your all is not enough. Some of you are just falling further and further behind," he tells the group.

"This evening, I will be cutting this group down."


After a lecture from Angry James Bond, the celebrities travel to their first challenge.

This time, the celebrities will swim through freezing cold water under ice.

Before the challenge begins, Shannan raises his hand to ask a question, but before he can even ask it, Angry James Bond interrupts him.


"SHUT THE F**K UP," he yells.

"I've given you simple f**king commands. I'm not giving you anymore."

Mate. You need to calm down.

WHY ARE YOU SO ANGRY ALL THE TIME??? The challenge begins, and Candice immerses herself in the freezing cold water.

After swimming under the ice, she emerges through an ice hole.

"When you come out of your accommodation, there's a wagon straight in front of you. What's the registration plate of that vehicle?" Angry James Bond asks her.

She doesn't know, obviously. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 


After getting out of the freezing cold water, the angry British men force Candice to roll around in the snow, which seems pointless, but okay.



Just... no. 

Later on, the Honey Badger takes on the ice water challenge.

"Who is the best looking man that you've ever set eyes on?" Angry James Bond asks him as he emerges from the water.

"Sean Connery, staff," he responds.

After forcing him to emerge himself in the water again, Angry James Bond asks again: "Who is the best looking man that you've ever set eyes on?"

"Ant Middleton, staff," he says.


"CORRECT," he yells.

Sir, pls. You can't just force the recruits to give you compliments.

Oh... no.

Firass is talking s**t again.

"Give me 50 press ups," Angry James Bond says after Firass makes an unwarranted comment.

"Press ups?" he responds.

"Shut the f**k up. I cannot afford to be repeating myself in conditions like this," he yells.


Back at the base camp, the angry British men are b*tching about the celebrities.


"We need to make a cull. We need to get rid of some of these people," Angry James Bond says.

As expected, the men are campaigning for Firass to be sent home.

After claiming that Firass "consumes all his energy on being a twat", the angry British men summon Firass for an interrogation.

"Do yourself a favour and keep your mouth shut. Show everyone through your actions what you're capable of, rather than through your mouth," Angry James Bond tells him.

"We're at a brick wall now. If you don't take on the information that we've given you, then we're at a dead end. And you know what happens there."

Yep, Firass is not making it through this episode...


It's time for the next challenge.

This time, the celebrities will race up a snow-covered mountain while dragging a heavy sled.

"LET'S GO YOU MAGGOTS," an angry British man yells.

As the celebrities move up the mountain, Candice and Erin fall behind the group, while Sabrina gets stuck in the snow.

Meanwhile, Merrick and the Honey Badger lead the pack. 

The pair make it to the top of the mountain first, while Firass, Candice, Molly, and Erin are the final celebrities to cross the finish line.

Oh s**t.

It's time for the final rose ceremony cull.

As they await their fate, the celebrities share a group hug which is... nice?

But their happiness doesn't last long.

It's time for Angry James Bond to tell some celebrities to f**k off, pls.

"Some of you have fallen so far behind, we cannot let you carry on this course. Some of you simply do not fit the mould. Some of you just haven't got the attitude. Some of you just haven't got the determination," he tells the group.

"Some of you will be leaving right now. We are not f**king around. We will not take the weak forward."


In the end, Firass and Candice are sent to pack their bags and leave. 

Honestly though, is anyone surprised? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯



Catch up on the rest of our SAS Australia recaps here:

Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 1: THESE BRITISH MEN ARE REALLY ANGRY.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 2: Dammit. 50 per cent of the gossip just walked off the show.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 3: The celebrities are starting to look utterly... broken.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 4: EVERY SINGLE PERSON WANTS FIRASS TO LEAVE.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 5: Oh. This just turned into an episode of The Bachelorette.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 6: This show just got completely out of control.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 7: These challenges are getting... out of hand.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 8: NO. THEY’RE GOING TO MURDER FIRASS.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 9: The celebrities share their deepest, darkest secrets in a literal truth circle.

Feature Image: Channel Seven.