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Goodness.
It's time for another week on SAS Australia.
We open on a rocky cliff face where the celebrities are preparing to crawl across a single rope... over the ocean.
"I hate heights," Eden admits.
"I had a traumatic experience with the ocean. That's why I wanted to do this course because it's a big challenge for me and it'll help me overcome my fears."
This is not going to end well.
As the recruits wait their turn to jump on the rope, Shayna admits to the group that despite being a professional swimmer, she's also "s**tting herself" over the challenge.
"But you've got the ocean below you, anyway," Firass chimes in and SIR. THAT'S NOT HELPFUL.
The challenge begins and several of the celebrities succeed, including Merrick, who discovers an unfortunate side effect of crawling along the rope.
Goodness.
"That's it. Keep making them faces," an angry British man says as Merrick crawls along the rope.
"It's my balls, staff," Merrick responds.
"It's absolutely shredding my nuts."
Sir, pls. We... didn't need to know that.
After Merrick finishes sharing far too much information, Eden prepares to face his fears.
As he heads to the rope, he recalls a drowning incident he previously witnessed.
"I was at a beach and I was hearing these screams from these two guys. They were going under. I grabbed my board and charged into the water and as I got there, he just sunk," he says.
"I jumped off my board and I started to drown. I was trying to stay afloat but there were these big waves coming in. It was like a dishwasher, it was so rough and rocky.
"The guy that I was trying to save... they brought him in. They were trying to revive him for about 40 minutes but he passed away."
After opening up about his fears, Eden successfully gets on the rope. But within seconds, he asks to be pulled back. He's too scared to go on.
He takes off his armband and withdraws from the show.
"I can't do it."
The challenge continues, and the remaining celebrities struggle to get across the rope.
After Erin, Candice, and Sabrina fail to complete the challenge, Molly becomes the first woman to make it across the ocean.
"It's something to be extremely proud of. Outstanding effort," Angry James Bond says and maybe he isn't so angry after all. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Back at the base camp, the men discuss the performance of the recruits.
After being disappointed by Shayna's efforts, they bring her in for an interrogation.
They want all the gossip about her doping ban, pls.
"They gave me a four-year ban from swimming, which would be the end of my career," Shayna shares.
"My whole life I've been an honest athlete. The purpose of my swimming was the fact that I could impact somebody else's life and be a role model to them because that's how I fell in love with the sport."
After Shayna shares her story, things get heavy.
"What if you can't ever swim again?" Angry James Bond asks.
"That's probably the hardest question that anyone could ask me," she says, tearing up.
"I've never thought of anything else but swimming.
"I can't go see my coach. I can't go swim with my squad. I can't go play another sport just for fun. I just want to be able to go back to go swimming and love swimming again."
"My whole life I've been an honest athlete."
It's the next day and the celebrities are emptying their... giant s**t toilet bucket.
As Firass, Shannan, Candice and Ali lift the bucket into a larger s**t bucket, it explodes.
Oh... no.
NO.
HOLY S**T.
THERE IS LITERAL POO EVERYWHERE.
E V E R Y W H E R E.
After the daily chores are wrapped up, the celebrities head to an undisclosed location.
Yep, it's time for another f**ked up challenge.
This time, the celebrities will complete a Special Forces exercise known as 'Surf Immersion'.
Sounds like a weird ~wellness~ practice, but okay.
The challenge involves the celebrities completely immersing themselves in the freezing cold ocean and GUYS. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS. JUST TAKE OFF YOUR ARMBANDS AND LEAVE.
THIS IS LITERAL HELL.
WHAT.
THE.
HELL.
After spending an hour in the water, the celebrities are put through a gruelling beasting.
The recruits are reaching breaking point, and we don't blame them.
"I can't do this s**t," Shayna tells Angry James Bond.
"I'm done," she says, before ripping off her armband. She quits the competition.
Back at the base camp, the temperature has dropped to just two degrees.
But despite this, the Honey Badger decides to enter the outdoor communal shower... butt naked. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Sir.
It's literally two degrees outside.
Elsewhere, the British men are havin' a b*tch about the recruits.
They agree that while Merrick and Sabrina performed well during the challenge, others, like Ali, struggled.
Oh. It's time for another interrogation.
The British men pull Ali into the interrogation room to ask her about The Bachelorette, etc.
She tells them that she's been struggling with anxiety from "being in the spotlight" in the last few years.
"Why were you in the spotlight?" one British man asks her and sir, you're not fooling us. We know you devoured every single second of Ali's journey.
"I was on a show where I'm a woman dating a few men," she says. (Is she not allowed to use the name, or?)
"It went really well. I met an amazing man, and we spent two amazing years together. But he didn't want the same things that I wanted," she adds.
"I still think he's my soul mate."
"I still think he's my soul mate. But our timelines are different. I feel a bit empty."
Oh s**t. She isn't over Taite. WHERE IS OSHER WHEN WE NEED HIM?
"You need to park that s**t," an angry British man responds.
"It isn't going to help you going forward in the rest of your life. You need to make a concerted effort to commit to this 100 per cent."
The guards place a hood over Ali's head. She's taken back to the camp.
UNTIL TUESDAY NIGHT.
Catch up on the rest of our SAS Australia recaps here:
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 1: THESE BRITISH MEN ARE REALLY ANGRY.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 2: Dammit. 50 per cent of the gossip just walked off the show.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 3: The celebrities are starting to look utterly... broken.
Mamamia recaps SAS Australia Episode 4: EVERY SINGLE PERSON WANTS FIRASS TO LEAVE.
Feature Image: Channel Seven.
