dating

6 things that can ruin your new relationship if you just made it official.

By: Stacey for Divorced Moms.

You like him.

He likes you.

The two of you go on a few dates, and you both realise the two of you hit it off. You decide to take the dating into a more serious level. Congratulations on your new relationship!

As with any new relationships, the first few months of dating feel amazing and great. You’re inspired, motivated, and all smiles the whole day! Nothing can seem to put you in a bad mood, especially with Cupid hovering around you. But all the excitement may blind you from the small things you do that may potentially harm your new love life.

With the help of experts from Essay Scholaradvisor I’ve rounded up the six things you need to watch out for if you want to keep this new relationship.

These are the six mistakes to avoid:

1. Assuming your new partner is perfect.

He always looks clean and shaven. He can be up before you to brew your coffee and can whip up a hearty breakfast. Lastly, he never forgets to put down the toilet seat after each time he uses the bathroom. So he got that all checked off your standards of an ideal man.

While this may convince you to consider marrying (again!) soon, why don’t you give the relationship more time? You might be too caught up in the honeymoon phase of a new relationship that you picture him as perfect, and entirely different from your previous spouse. Reality check: He’s still human.

Despite appearances he is not perfect. (Image via iStock)
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2. Dropping your life for him.

The excitement of a new relationship can be satisfying for you and your self-esteem. And you’d probably want to spend most of your time with him. That’s perfectly understandable.

Go on dates frequently if you feel like it. But remember to give each other personal time. Don’t abandon the things that matter to you as an individual. Keep doing the stuff you love, and allow him to do the same. Don’t suffocate him by being too available.

3. Being too possessive.

Possessiveness is always a turn-off, whether in a new commitment or a long-time one. Just because he is your catch does not mean you own him. Make your relationship about two independent individuals who complement each other. That way, there will be no need to be too dependent or too possessive of your partner. Moreover, showing possessiveness reveals your insecurity and lack of trust in your beau.

Possessiveness can lead to fights. (Image via iStock.)

4. Overanalysing the situation.

This one may look harmless, but you don’t realise that it can actually harm your relationship. For instance, you want to see him again the next day, but you hesitate about asking because you think you might be too available or too dependent! The best thing is just to simply say it. If he agrees to see you, good. If not, it’s okay! Guys prefer being straightforward than being too dramatic or hard to figure out. Don’t let your mind think too much, and just let things happen.

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5. Lying about your needs.

Honesty will always be a good thing in any relationship. It implies openness and trust.

While communicating is significant in handling a relationship well as you get to discuss stuff with your partner, it would be better if what you communicate is truthful. Otherwise, you are only discussing things to avoid confrontations, but not to address important concerns.

Are you comfortable with your current set-up? Open up and tell him. An honest and open communication means that you trust your partner enough to understand you and your needs.

Be open about how you're feeling and what you want. (Image via iStock.)

6. Avoiding big, serious talks.

If you plan to get really serious with your current flame and consider remarrying, then you have to deal with issues and concerns that matter. What are your long-term goals as a couple? Do you share the same set of values? While these kinds of discussions need not happen right away as it might look as if you are jumping on the gun too soon, you and your beau can set the pace and find the right time to discuss these things.

With a budding relationship at the moment, it is important to look at the bigger picture while also being careful with potential relationship mistakes. This way, you can be ready to face a lifetime of bliss with your new man.

This post originally appeared on Divorced Moms. 

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