tv

What the buyers of The Block homes all chose to overlook.

On Sunday night, five buyers purchased five homes in Melbourne’s suburb of Elsternwick for between $2.615m and $3.067m.

Josh and Elyse, the winning couple, sold their property to Australian comedian and radio personality Dave Hughes, and walked away with over half a million dollars.

Their house, like the others, was stunning.

Beautiful furniture. Creative interior design. Trendy bathrooms and a backyard you only ever see on TV renovation shows.

But it was a passing comment on Tuesday night’s episode of The Project that made me stop and think about what it really means to buy one of the properties from The Block. 

As the hosts chatted to Dave Hughes, Peter Helliar laughed about the fact that he’d really just bought a house built by amateurs. 

dave hughes the block mistake
Dave Hughes with Josh and Elyse. Image via Channel Nine.

"You know what I don't get?" said Peter Helliar. "You're watching people who are mostly unprofessional rush and build a house, often with cheaper materials, that gets criticised throughout the series, and then you overpay for it."

Dave Hughes responded by acknowledging that both he and Helliar have done comedy routines about the concept behind the show, and simply said, "now I am that comedy routine".

He added, however that "Josh and Elyse did a great job and it's a family home for a long time".

Of course, as a carpenter, Josh had more experience than most when it comes to renovating houses. Ronnie and Georgia had also renovated 10 properties together before appearing on The Block, making them somewhat qualified for the task ahead.

ADVERTISEMENT

But still, the reality is that the people living in the multi-million dollar homes sold on the show are in a very unique situation.

Take, for example, laundry and hallway week. At this point, it was discovered that Josh and Elyse's five-person house had a grand total of one storage cupboard. ONE.

THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE BUILDING A HOUSE FOR THE PURPOSES OF TV.

Have a look through all five houses below. Post continues...

Hannah and Clint

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Sticks and Wombat

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Josh and Elyse

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Ronnie and Georgia

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Jason and Sarah

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

During living and dining week, the following comments were made about Sticks and Womba's property.

Ahem:

On the boxy things surrounding the TV: “They look like ugly and complicated Tetris pieces which don’t really fit.”

On the furniture:  “They need to take these couches back and they need to redesign their furniture layout.”

On the full room: "This room is totally lacking in any warmth. It has no soul."

On their design skills: “I want to shake them and say stop."

... Jesus.

I mean, my living and dining area (which is one in the same) also doesn't have a 'soul', but at least I haven't had to hear anyone actually say that out loud.

That would be... rude. And awkward. And I'd probably think about the lack of 'soul' every time I entered it.

Meanwhile, during the same week, Sarah and Jason put their five-year-old daughter's drawing on the wall.

But... idk.

ADVERTISEMENT

If you're not Sarah and Jason, do you want Sarah and Jason's daughter's drawing on your wall? Is that a bit... odd?

Then there's Clint and Hannah's issues "balancing" one of their bedrooms, with judge Neil Whittaker saying he didn't feel "welcome".

"The little faults disconnect us emotionally," the judges agreed.

Oh... okay.

Apart from the very detailed and very harsh criticisms that have been leveled at the house you've just purchased, people who buy a property from The Block also have to deal with the fact that while something might be really impressive on TV, it's very weird in reality.

The most obvious example is Sticks and Wombat's TV in the ceiling above the bed which I will personally always have a problem with, because WHY?

This design decision makes me irrationally angry.

As does the use of 'vomit yellow' (as some commenters have called it) detailing in one of Josh and Elyse's bedrooms, and the 'naked' pillars out the front of Sticks and Wombat's house (sorry but they are).

The fact is, both the judges AND the entire country have spent weeks and weeks and weeks critiquing these houses, and the people who buy them have to live within (or rent out) rooms described as 'having no soul' and 'not feeling welcome' for a ridiculously expensive price. 

And a home built for TV is surely different to a house bought to live in.

But, hey, all power to them. At least they own a house.

You guys are the real winners.
FROM OUR NETWORK
00:00 / ???